Proverbs
Notes on Proverbs – Chapter 31
Proverbs 31:1-3
The Words of King Lemuel
Introduction:
1. Proverbs chapter 30 was written by an unknown man named Agur.
2. Proverbs chapter 31 was written by another unknown man named Lemuel.
a. All we really know about him is that he was a king.
b. We don’t know where he reigned or for how long.
3. His words of wisdom are broken up into three sections dealing with wine, women, and justice.
4. Note that his words of wisdom came to him from his mother.
a. His mother taught him these truths—and he recorded them for us—under the direction and inspiration of the Holy Spirit.
b. Notice also that Lemuel is a grown man. He is at the age where he needs to hear words of wisdom about wine and women.
c. He is a king. He also needs to hear words of wisdom about how to reign—in righteousness and justice.
d. And it is his mother who gives him this advice.
e. Mothers will always be mothers—even of grown children.
f. Mothers will always have words of wisdom to offer their children… even when they are adults and in prominent positions, like a king!
5. This is a bit out of the ordinary because one would think that this kind of wisdom would come from the father to his son.
a. Much in the early chapters of Proverbs were words of wisdom from Solomon (as a father) to his sons.
b. Prov. 1:8-9 – “My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother: 9For they shall be an ornament of grace unto thy head, and chains about thy neck.”
c. This thought is repeated by Solomon in the early chapters.
d. But in chapter 31, Lemuel receives instruction from his mother.
• Perhaps his father was dead.
• Perhaps his father did not have any words of wisdom. He may have been a fool.
• Perhaps his father was a pagan king who married a Jewish woman.
• We just don’t have any information about Lemuel’s family.
• Lemuel wrote down what his mother told him.
6. Vs. 1 states that the words of Lemuel were part of the “prophecy” (oracle) that his mother taught him.
a. Prophecy: Oracle; burden; a weighty message; often used of prophetic portions of Scripture.
b. It is the same word used in Prov. 30:1 – The words of Agur – also translated “prophecy.”
c. This was a heavy burden on Lemuel’s mother’s heart that she felt she had to share with her son.
7. Of course, what we have in our Bibles are the very words God intended for us to have.
a. God used many human sources for truth that was recorded in His Word.
b. He used many different human authors: herdsmen and fishermen; kings and prophets.
c. These human authors quoted from some unlikely sources: A pagan poet; well-known traditional truths about the weather; and (here) a king’s mother.
d. But the words that ended up recorded in our Bibles were ultimately inspired by the Spirit of God.
e. The ultimate Author of this book is the Holy Spirit. Regardless of their human source, they are “not in the words which man’s wisdom teacheth, but which the Holy Ghost teacheth” (I Cor. 2:13).
8. Vs. 2 – Here Lemuel’s mother is addressing her son… attempting to capture his attention.
a. He is called “my son” and “the son of my womb” and “the son of my vows.”
b. Evidently she made a vow concerning her son. We are not told what it was.
• Was she the wife of a pagan king who vowed to God to bring up her son to know the true and living God and to walk in his ways?
c. This kind of vow was not unheard of in the Old Testament.
d. I Sam. 1:11 – Hannah made a vow to God concerning her son Samuel.
• “And she vowed a vow, and said, O LORD of hosts, if thou wilt indeed look on the affliction of thine handmaid, and remember me, and not forget thine handmaid, but wilt give unto thine handmaid a man child, then I will give him unto the LORD all the days of his life, and there shall no razor come upon his head.”
• Lemuel’s mother may have made a similar vow concerning her son.
• She wanted Lemuel to KNOW that she had made this vow to the Lord.
• She had special plans for this son. Therefore, now that he was a young king, she wanted to warn him concerning certain pitfalls that had become the downfall of other kings.
e. She seemed to realize that when a young man is suddenly thrust into the position of great wealth and power—it can easily go to his head.
• We have countless examples of this from Hollywood. How many young actresses who became rich and famous as children turned out well? Many destroyed their lives in drugs, alcohol, and immoral living.
• This is the case with young men who become rich and famous athletes and musicians too. It often does not turn out well for them.
• Lemuel’s mother seemed to realize this and she had a heavy burden on her heart that she had to share with her son.
King Lemuel’s Mother’s First Line of Advice
A. “Give not thy strength unto women
1. Her first warning comes concerning his relationship to women.
a. Evidently he is a relatively young and inexperienced king.
b. As a young man thrust into a position of power, wealth, and fame all at once, there would be many temptations.
c. He could have any woman in the kingdom—he was the king!
d. He could live the life of a playboy… a life of pleasure… seeking to satisfy his flesh with sexual pleasure and a life dedicated to pure hedonism and debauchery.
e. Perhaps Lemuel’s mother had heard that her son was already beginning to be involved in this kind of lifestyle.
f. This may help us understand the expression: “What my son!”
• It appears to be a lament, like, “What can I say to you my son? What have I heard of you?”
• Perhaps Lemuel’s mother has a heavy burden because she has heard rumors about her son.
2. “Give not thy strength unto women.”
a. The warning was that he should not dedicate the strength of his youth towards chasing women.
b. The temptation would be there because (unlike most men in the kingdom), he had the wherewithal and opportunity as king to do so if he wanted to.
c. One wonders why his mother is giving this warning and not his father. Could it be that his father was guilty of this sin and morally disqualified from giving such a warning?
d. If that was the case, it is understandable why his mother would have such a burden on her heart to see that her son NOT follow in his father’s footsteps.
e. A man “gives his strength” unto women when he wastes his strongest years (as a youth) chasing women.
f. The songwriter urges young men to “give of your BEST to the Master; give of the strength of your youth.”
g. Our “best” and the “strength of our youth” is to be reserved for the Lord… not wasted on loose living.
h. Prov. 5:9 – “Lest thou give thine honour unto others, and thy years unto the cruel.”
• Here the warning is of giving “thy years” (the best years; one’s youth and strength) unto others.
• Prov. 5:10 – You could lose your wealth and your labors end up elsewhere.
• This is terrible when it happens to an ordinary individual; it is far worse when it happens to a king.
• Later on in history, in Daniel 5, we read of the loose living of King Belshazzar: a great feast with wine and women.
• That night he lost his kingdom to the invading armies of Media and Persia.
• Wine and women (as well as defiance against God) caused this Babylonian king to lose his kingdom.
• Lemuel’s mother did not want this sort of thing to happen to the son of her vow.
• She obviously didn’t know about Belshazzar (he hadn’t been born yet), but she must have heard of similar horror stories of other kings in other lands.
3. Deut. 17:17 – The Law of Moses forbade a king from “multiplying wives to himself.”
a. The warning came from Moses and Scripture.
b. Now it is coming from Lemuel’s mother.
c. It is good for mothers to teach and warn her children from the Scriptures… that when they grow up it will not depart from them.
4. There were many similar warnings in Proverbs.
a. Prov. 22:14 – “The mouth of strange women is a deep pit: he that is abhorred of the LORD shall fall therein.”
b. Prov. 2:16-18 – “To deliver thee from the strange woman, even from the stranger which flattereth with her words; 17Which forsaketh the guide of her youth, and forgetteth the covenant of her God. 18For her house inclineth unto death, and her paths unto the dead.”
c. Much of Proverbs chapters five and seven deal with this subject.
d. Lemuel’s mother gives her son a similar warning.
B. Nor thy ways to that which destroyeth kings
1. Vs. 3 is a synonymous parallelism.
a. We have seen dozens of these in the book of Proverbs. It is a common form of Hebrew poetry.
b. In a synonymous parallelism, both parts of the proverb are making the same statement, using different language. It is designed for effect – as well as to elaborate and add another shade of meaning to the principle.
c. The next two verses of this proverb are also synonymous parallelisms.
d. It is vital to know this in our interpretation of vs. 4 dealing with wine.
2. The parallel is as follows:
a. Lemuel’s “strength” is parallel to his “ways.”
b. And “women” is parallel to “that which destroyeth kings.”
3. Just as Lemuel’s mother advised him not to give his strength to women, in the second part of the proverb she urges him not to give his “ways” unto women.
a. Ways: Path; road; route; journey.
b. It is used metaphorically of one’s pathway in life… the road one takes in life – the direction of one’s life.
c. The admonition his mother gives is that Lemuel not make womanizing a “way of life.”
d. In other words, “Don’t go down that road! It leads to no good.”
4. The next part of the parallel is that the “women” being pursued find their parallel in the expression “that which destroyeth kings.”
a. Her point is that chasing women has been the downfall of many kings before.
b. We all know the sad story of Solomon.
c. I Kings 11:1-8 – “But king Solomon loved many strange women, together with the daughter of Pharaoh, women of the Moabites, Ammonites, Edomites, Zidonians, and Hittites; 2 Of the nations concerning which the LORD said unto the children of Israel, Ye shall not go in to them, neither shall they come in unto you: for surely they will turn away your heart after their gods: Solomon clave unto these in love. 3 And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines: and his wives turned away his heart. 4 For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the LORD his God, as was the heart of David his father. 5 For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Zidonians, and after Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites. 6 And Solomon did evil in the sight of the LORD, and went not fully after the LORD, as did David his father. 7 Then did Solomon build an high place for Chemosh, the abomination of Moab, in the hill that is before Jerusalem, and for Molech, the abomination of the children of Ammon. 8 And likewise did he for all his strange wives, which burnt incense and sacrificed unto their gods.”
d. Many wives was the destruction of Solomon.
e. Adultery was the destruction of Solomon’s father, David. It was because of his sin with Bathsheba that God said, “the sword shall not depart from your house.”
f. Yes, kings can easily succumb to the temptation of women.
5. This is certainly an appropriate and needful warning to all men—whether you are a king or just an average Joe.
a. A lifestyle dedicated to lust and loose living breeds destruction.
b. It destroys one’s health and strength; it destroys families; it ruins careers; but most importantly it ruins a believer’s walk, fellowship, and usefulness in God’s service.
Proverbs 31:4-5
Lemuel’s Mother’s Advice Concerning Alcohol
Introduction:
1. This counsel comes from the mother of King Lemuel.
2. All we know about Lemuel is that he was a king. We don’t even know where he reigned.
3. But he had a wise mother who was concerned about her son in the position of a king. She realized that that position came with its own unique set of temptations.
4. Hence, she sought to give him some motherly counsel to keep him from making some serious mistakes in his reign—mistakes that could ruin his life and the kingdom!
5. Her first topic of advice had to do with women. “Don’t give the strength of your youth unto chasing loose women. That lifestyle has destroyed many a king.”
6. Her second topic of advice has to do with alcohol. An honest reading of this text makes it clear that alcohol is NOT for the believer.
7. This wise woman continued to warn her son even after he was an adult—and a king at that! She warns him about wine and women: a dangerous combination.
1. This proverb (like vs. 3) is a synonymous parallelism.
a. That means that both parts of the verse are saying the same thing, using different words.
b. The parallels are (1) kings and princes = royal families and (2) wine and strong drink = alcohol)
c. For the purpose of the proverb, they are virtually the same.
d. You might paraphrase the thought by saying, “Alcohol is not for royal families.”
2. Wine and strong drink are seen in this passage as the same thing.
a. We like to break up alcohol use into different categories today.
b. On the one hand we have wine and beer (lower alcoholic content) and hard liquor, i.e., distilled alcohol (whiskey; bourbon; etc.) which has a much higher alcoholic content.
c. But that is NOT the distinction made in Bible times.
d. In the Bible times, the distillation process had not yet been invented. There was no “hard liquor” in those days.
e. What the Bible called strong drink was actually undiluted wine.
• Today, we consider wine (undiluted wine) to be on the low end of the alcoholic content (9-11%). That is what the Bible calls “strong drink”… and was forbidden.
• They knew nothing of alcohol such as whiskey (with 40-50% alcohol). That was off the charts.
• Did the Jews drink wine? Did Jesus and His disciples drink wine? The answer is “yes and no.”
• NO they did not drink wine the way it is drunk today – straight.
• YES they did drink wine—but they diluted it with between 3-10 parts water.
» When diluted, it had a negligible alcohol content.
» They USED wine to purify their stagnant, water which had a high alkaline content.
» If they drank their stagnant water plain, it would cause stomach problems.
» I Tim. 5:23 – That’s why Paul told Timothy to “Drink no longer water, but use a little wine for thy stomach’s sake and thine often infirmities.”
» He wasn’t telling Timothy to stop drinking water; but not to drink water exclusively (straight out of the cistern). It would hurt his stomach.
» USE a little wine to purify the water and soften the high alkaline content… this prevented the water from ruining one’s stomach lining.
• Adding 3-10 parts water diluted the alcohol content to such a low degree that you wouldn’t get drunk… or even a buzz.
• So, did Jesus drink wine? Yes—but NOT the way they drink it today. That was considered barbaric.
• Undiluted wine was what the Bible calls “strong drink” and that was forbidden. There is no way a person can read the passages in the Bible about strong drink and put a positive spin on it.
f. Thus, in our proverb (a synonymous parallelism), wine (when undiluted) is used as a synonym for strong drink. They are the same.
3. Lemuel’s mother’s advice: It is not for kings.
a. This should not be understood to mean that it’s not for kings, but it is fine for everyone else. That’s not the point.
b. The point is that it is especially not for kings.
c. Kings were leaders; others looked up to them; they were to be examples for the nation.
d. Kings were not always good examples—but they SHOULD have been. Sometimes their behavior was abominable.
e. Lemuel’s mother wants her royal son to be a GOOD example.
f. Therefore, (if you want to be a good example) wine and strong drink is not for you!
g. As believers, others are watching us. We want to be a good example—and we certainly don’t want to be a stumbling block.
5a Lest they drink, and forget the law…
1. Here, the king’s mother gives Lemuel some reasons why he (as king) should not drink wine or strong drink.
2. WHY should a king avoid alcohol?
a. Because it will make you forget God’s Law.
b. If a king is going to rule over others; he should be able to rule over his own self.
3. Does the Bible forbid EVERY use of alcohol?
a. NO! They needed it to purify their water.
b. There was a legitimate use for fermented wine.
4. But what does the Bible say about drinking undiluted wine called “strong drink” in this passage?
a. It causes a person to forget the law. For Lemuel, that meant the law of his land.
b. A king could not function as king and faithfully execute his duties as King.
c. In monarchies, often the king was all three branches of government: legislative, judicial, and executive branch.
d. The government was on the shoulders of a king.
e. If he drank strong drink, he would forget the law.
1. Here is another warning concerning wine and strong drink: it will cause a king to pervert judgment of the afflicted (oppressed).
a. A king often functioned as a judge (like Solomon having to judge who was the real mother of the living baby).
b. If you were suffering affliction (someone murdered your son; or broke into your home; etc.) and had to appear before a judge to decide the case, would it matter to you if the judge was a little woozy from drinking? You want a judge to have CLEAR thinking… not clouded and fuzzy.
c. If you were falsely accused of murder and your life was hanging in the balance, would it matter to you if the judge understood what your defense lawyer said?
d. Keep in mind that our passage tells us that alcohol causes a man to pervert “judgment” (justice – righteousness).
e. Would it matter to you if the alcohol had twisted and perverted the judge’s ability to tell right from wrong… if it affected his ability to discern “justice”?
f. Since we are told that drinking causes a person to forget the law… and to pervert justice, anyone would be outraged if a judge came to adjudicate an important case under the influence of alcohol.
g. If your life, your freedom, your property, or your family was hanging in the balance, you would want the man deciding the case to be clear in his thinking.
h. Here we are told plainly: alcohol PERVERTS that.
i. It twists a person’s sense of justice – right and wrong.
j. Isa. 28:7 – The same warning is given to priests and prophets: “But they also have erred through wine, and through strong drink are out of the way; the priest and the prophet have erred through strong drink, they are swallowed up of wine, they are out of the way through strong drink; they err in vision, they stumble in judgment.”
2. What Lemuel’s mother told him about alcohol was important wherever he reigned as king. But once this proverb was recorded in Jewish Scriptures, and applied to Jewish kings, it had a whole new meaning.
a. That was because in Israel, the law of the land was also divinely inspired Scripture and a reflection of the holiness of God… and the righteousness of God.
b. In Israel, a king drinking strong drink would forget God’s Law; He would forget the truth of God’s Word.
c. And today, strong drink causes us to forget about God’s Word in general: what the Bible says about purity, holiness, and morality.
d. It loosens a person up so that he is no longer thinking about God and God’s Word and is open to other things… sinful thoughts, words, and deeds.
e. It causes us to pervert judgment or justice. It causes us to be unable to recognize clearly the difference between right and wrong.
f. It is no wonder that people who are under the influence of alcohol do things they would NEVER do in their right mind.
3. It is true that this passage does not openly forbid alcohol.
a. That’s because fermented wine had some valuable and necessary legitimate uses.
b. Therefore the Bible never says, “don’t touch it under any circumstances.”
c. But the Bible does give us enough information about it to make a wise, sensible, and discerning decision.
d. This verse doesn’t technically say, “Alcohol is always sinful.”
e. But it does say this: If you drink it, it will cause you to forget God’s Word and it will pervert your sense of right and wrong.
f. Isn’t that enough? Isn’t God really letting us know what He wants us to do?
g. If a mother says to her little boy, “Johnny, if you play in the road you will get hit by a car,” isn’t that the same thing as saying, “Don’t play in the road?” Isn’t it clear what the will of the mother is? A little child would understand.
h. But many evangelicals today don’t understand what the Bible says about alcohol for obvious reasons: they don’t want to know… because they want to drink.
4. In many things, the Bible teaches us by using principles: principles that are universal and apply in all cultures and in all ages.
a. We want to glean a principle from this passage that applies to alcohol and even BEYOND alcohol.
b. The main point of this proverb is that when something causes us to forget God’s Word and causes us to pervert justice and causes us to be unable to discern right from wrong—we should AVOID it.
c. Prov. 3:1 – “My son, forget NOT my law!”
d. I say this because marijuana is fast becoming legalized across the country… first medicinally and then totally legal.
e. I can virtually guarantee that once it’s legal, it won’t be long before evangelicals are accepting the use of marijuana.
• It won’t happen overnight. But there will be some on the fringe who will accept it… and then gradually it gets closer and closer to mainstream.
• They will argue, Jesus drank wine; this is the wine of the 21st century.
• They will argue, I’m not getting stoned, just a little buzz.
• After all, it puts me in the mood for worship.
• Once the church band gets rocking, the marijuana really makes me feel holy.
• It calms me down. It makes me feel good… warm and loving. I find that I never lose my temper on marijuana.
• It’s legal. The Bible doesn’t forbid marijuana. Why not?
• God created it; it must be good.
• And for evangelicals who now justify the use of social drinking, they will have nothing to say. You can use the very same arguments to justify marijuana use (once it’s legal) that they use for alcohol today.
• You fundamentalists are legalists and joy killers!
f. Why should we avoid marijuana… or wine for that matter?
• Here’s one reason: it will cause you to “forget the law, and pervert the judgment.”
• That should be reason enough.
Proverbs 31:6-7
Strong Drink for the Perishing
Introduction:
1. This passage is a continuation of the advice given to King Lemuel by his mother.
2. She warns him about the potential dangers of wine and women.
3. Last week we looked at vs. 4-5.
a. Lemuel’s mother told her son that wine and strong drink are not for kings.
b. They are dangerous because they cause you to forget the law (and kings were to uphold the law), and because they cause you to pervert judgment, and the king was to uphold justice in the land for the afflicted.
c. Alcohol perverts a person’s ability to discern between right and wrong; sensible and not sensible.
d. We might use the mayor of Toronto as a sad illustration of this.
4. Previously she warned her son that wine and strong drink cause a man to “give the strength of their youth” to chasing immoral women, and it has been the destruction of many a king.
5. One is hard pressed to see in this passage a ringing endorsement of wine and strong drink.
6. However, in vs. 6-7, Lemuel’s mother does state that there is a legitimate use for wine and strong drink.
1. Some believers who are bent on justifying drinking, and are looking for a passage to justify it, have tried to see justification in this verse.
a. It says, “GIVE strong drink” to certain individuals.
b. Give it to those who are perishing, and to those with a heavy heart.
c. Their twisted view of this passage is that the Bible allows us to drink if we are sad or have a heavy heart… or if we are going through a period of misery and trials.
d. However, that is not what the passage teaches.
2. We have noted several times already in this short context, that the author has been using “synonymous parallelisms.”
a. In this very common Hebrew poetic form, the author describes the same thing in two different expressions.
b. They both mean the same thing (synonymous) but they express the thought differently for emphasis and to add a various shade of meaning.
c. We saw this poetic form in vs. 3 –
• Strength is parallel to ways
• Women is parallel to “that which destroys kings”
d. We saw this poetic form in vs. 4 –
• Kings is parallel to princes (royalty)
• Wine is parallel to strong drink (undiluted wine IS strong drink)
e. We see this same poetic form in vs. 6 –
• Strong drink is parallel to wine
• “Him that is ready to perish” is parallel to “those that be of heavy hearts”
3. Some connect the command to “give” strong drink to certain individuals as being connected with what is said in verse 4: “It is not for kings, O Lemuel to drink wine or strong drink… give it to those who are poor and miserable, but it is not for you.”
a. In this interpretation, the command to “give” strong drink to others is almost sarcastic.
b. And the main thrust of Lemuel’s mother’s argument is that “it is not for kings… not for you!”
c. I don’t take that view.
d. I believe that the situation described here is a legitimate usage for wine and strong drink. It is what the text says.
4. Lemuel’s mother is pointing out that there is a legitimate usage for strong drink.
a. It is for those who are ready to perish.
• The term “perish” means “destroyed.”
• It is often used of perishing in the sense of spiritual condemnation – perishing for all eternity in the Lake of Fire.
• However, the term is also used of “dying” – the destruction of the body – the end of a person’s earthly life.
• This is the sense in which it is used in our proverb.
• The proverb speaks of a person who is ready to perish is one who is on his deathbed.
• Try to put yourself in social setting of the day in which this was written.
» Doctors prescribe pain killers for people who are suffering on their death beds today.
» Imagine if you had an arrow stuck in your chest. They could pull it out, but there was not much they could do beyond that—then.
» Imagine on your deathbed with painful bone cancer… or you fell off your horse (or camel) and had multiple broken bones. What pain!
» They had no pain killers or anesthesia in those days.
» They used undiluted wine (strong drink) instead. It was all they had.
» That was a legitimate usage of alcohol in those days.
» Of course, today, we have much more effective pain killers for those recovering from surgery or who were in an awful accident. Thus, there is NO NEED to use alcohol today.
» This was a medical use of alcohol. Paul told Timothy to USE a little wine for his stomach. It was the best medicine they had then.
» In Luke 10:34 we are told that the good Samaritan came upon a man injured and beaten, lying on the side of the road—potentially to die. He poured “oil and wine” on the man’s wound. This was the best medicine they had to sanitize the wound.
» Mark 15:23 – They gave wine mingled with myrrh to Jesus on the cross—but He refused. It was commonly used to numb pain.
» We have better medicines today. We don’t NEED alcohol any more for medicinal purposes.
• If a person was beaten, badly wounded, agonizing in pain, and on his death bed—give him strong drink!
• That was the advice of Lemuel’s mother.
• Remember, she said, “It’s not for you Lemuel; but give it to someone who needs it for medicinal purposes.”
5. Vs. 6b – Give “wine to those that be of heavy hearts.”
a. What does this expression teach us?
b. Should we drink alcohol when we are down in the dumps and are sad and heavy about something going on in our lives?
c. If this expression appeared all by itself without any context, we might conclude that.
d. However, it does appear in a context. In vs. 3 and 4, the author has been using synonymous parallelisms.
e. That means that they are both describing the same thing – emphasizing a different aspect of the same thing.
f. In other words, the man with a heavy heart is the man who is ready to perish.
• He is physically suffering in pain.
• He is on his deathbed.
• He is obviously of a heavy heart.
• Give strong drink to him.
g. And again, this speaks of a legitimate medicinal use for wine.
1. Here we have yet another Hebrew poetic form.
a. This is either yet another synonymous parallelism or it is a synthetic parallelism… with virtually the same meaning.
b. Synonymous:
• “Let him drink and forget his poverty” is parallel to (let him drink—implied) and “remember his misery no more.”
c. Synthetic:
• (1) let him drink; (2) forget his poverty; (3) remember his misery no more.
• Under this form, the point is to lay a foundation and build upon it.
d. Either way, forgetting poverty and remembering misery no more are connected.
2. Here Lemuel’s mother is clear: LET HIM DRINK!
a. This man is allowed to drink. But what man is she speaking of? The man she just described!
b. It is the man on his deathbed who is not in good spirits—he is in agony.
c. The alcohol is given for one reason: to forget! To cause the man to stop thinking about his pain. It is used as a painkiller… medicinally.
3. Alcohol is for those living in poverty and misery.
a. In this passage, the poverty and misery are parallel too.
b. POVERTY: A condition of lacking something; a deficiency; scarcity.
• It is often used of poverty; being poor.
• However, it does not necessarily mean finances.
• It speaks of a poor, lowly condition of life.
• The man in question here—whether he is a pauper or a prince is in a lowly condition: agonizing on his death bed!
c. MISERY: Trouble; affliction; toil; grievance; pain.
• It is possible that the misery that made wine use legitimate included extreme emotional distress—such as a mother who just lost her three sons and her newborn when her house burned down and she has gone into a physical shock…
d. However, in the context, Lemuel’s mother is still speaking about the same situation: a man agonizing on his deathbed, with a heavy heart, lacking essentials of life (like a good painkiller!), and is in misery.
e. The advice of Lemuel’s mother is “Let him drink!” Strong drink is for him!
f. And again, “It is not for you O Lemuel. You don’t want to forget the law. You need your ability to reason and distinguish right from wrong. You are not on your deathbed—you are seated on a throne. Let the man agonizing on his deathbed drink it—but not you!
4. Our passage tells us who alcohol is for and who it is not for.
a. It is for those who are in need of medicine to numb their pain. It is for those who are in misery and have heavy hearts because of their poor physical condition.
b. It is NOT for those who need their faculties. It is not for those who want to be able to discern between right and wrong – between sensible and that which is not sensible. It is not for those who want to REMEMBER God’s Law.
c. You really have to twist the meaning of this passage to make it support social drinking for the Christian in the 21st century.
Proverbs 31:8
Open thy Mouth for the Dumb
Introduction:
1. We continue to consider the advice that King Lemuel’s mother gave to him.
2. So far, all of Proverbs 31 has consisted of motherly advice to a young king.
3. So far her advice has been negative: warnings concerning the dangers of wine and immoral women.
4. Tonight she gives some positive advice. She encourages her royal son to use his mouth for good. That’s good advice whether you are a king or a poor man.
A. Open Thy Mouth for the Dumb
1. Opening your mouth for the dumb is a figure of speech which means to speak up for someone who may not have a voice.
a. The term “dumb” means someone who is a mute; they are literally unable to speak.
b. The obvious usage of the term here is figurative.
c. But we take the meaning of that figure of speech literally.
d. The advice is to literally speak up for those who have no voice for various reasons.
2. Those who are poor often do not have a voice or a say in the affairs of the land. They have no voice “politically.” They don’t know the royal family. They don’t have any friends in high places in the government. The plight of the poor was usually not even considered by the aristocracy or the royals when making laws. The laws were often made to benefit the rich and the powerful.
3. Those who were poor did not have a voice “socially” either. They were the low rungs on the ladder. Nobody listened to them. The rich and the powerful ruled society and formed the society in a way that was beneficial to them… without considering the poor.
B. In the Cause of All Such As Are Appointed to Destruction
1. Here Lemuel’s mother advises her royal son to open his mouth and speak up in the cause of those who are appointed to destruction.
2. The two groups here are really one.
a. Those who are dumb and had no voice socially or politically were the same folks who were appointed to destruction.
3. Appointed to destruction:
a. This too is a figure of speech – a common Hebrew idiom.
b. Literally the Hebrew reads “sons of destruction.”
c. “Sons of” is a very common Hebrew figure of speech. It means to have the same characteristics as.
• Sons of wickedness were wicked people.
• Sons of thunder were thunderous people.
• Sons of disobedience were disobedient people; those whose lives were characterized by disobedience.
d. Thus, “sons of destruction” were people whose lives were characterized by destruction.
e. Thus, “appointed to destruction” is a good translation of this Hebrew idiom.
4. Lemuel’s mother seems to be implying that the “voiceless poor” are the ones whose lives are so often “characterized by destruction.”
a. The noun “destruction” has various shades of meaning: destruction, misfortune, destitute, etc.
b. You might translate the idiom as “sons of misfortune” or “sons of destitution.”
c. The lives of the poor are often characterized by misfortune, great needs, and lack of resources, and that often leads to destruction.
d. It is not an enviable position to be in; and evidently Lemuel’s mother understood that.
e. She wanted her royal son to speak up for those people.
f. She probably saw countless examples of the poor being trampled over and taken advantage of by the rich and powerful.
g. The poor have always been the “sons of misfortune.”
5. The voiceless have always needed someone with compassion to speak up for them.
a. Sometimes God puts people in a position where they are able to speak up for the welfare of others. That was especially so for kings.
b. David in Saul’s court was like one who was “appointed to destruction.” But Jonathan spoke up for David before his father Saul many times.
c. Esther spoke up for her people and delivered them from destruction.
d. And this isn’t restricted to royal families either.
e. We may not find ourselves in positions to speak up for others that is a life or death situation. But there will be times when we can defend someone who is being abused, mistreated, or maligned.
C. Application to a King
1. In Bible times, kings had virtually unlimited power.
a. They had the power of life and death. They were all three branches of government: executive, legislative, and judicial.
b. An evil king could make life absolutely miserable for a great number of people.
c. A good king could greatly reduce the suffering of the poor, foreigners, widows, orphans, the handicapped, and the destitute.
2. But even a good king, who wasn’t out to take advantage of the poor, could make life miserable for the poor by default – by not actively considering their plight.
a. Lemuel’s mother seemed to know that as well. She wanted her son to actively consider the plight of the poor and to speak up for them.
b. Other greedy men would naturally take advantage of the poor – because the poor had no voice and were helpless. They were easy prey.
c. But if they had the king on their side; if the king would just consider their plight, and would speak up for them, their lives could be so much better.
3. Lemuel’s mother wanted her royal son to be a compassionate and merciful king who was concerned for all segments of society.
a. Of course kings showing mercy and compassion for the poor was not always the case… in any land.
b. Politics (then and now) was often based upon the old principle: “you scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours.” You do something for me and I’ll do something for you.
c. But the poor were not in a position to really “do” much of anything for a wealthy king. They had little to contribute.
d. They didn’t then and they don’t now, have the resources to play that game of politics. They were “without a voice” – dumb.
e. A king had to step outside the norm in order to show grace and compassion to the voiceless poor – not expecting anything in return.
f. That is exactly what the Bible challenged kings (and all those in authority) to do.
g. The king was to be the advocate of the poor and needy.
h. Prov. 20:28 – “Mercy and truth preserve the king: and his throne is upholden by mercy.”
i. It was beneficial to the preservation of the king’s reign and his kingdom to be merciful. Otherwise, there could be a popular uprising and a coup.
j. Lemuel’s mother had good advice for her son.
• On the one hand, the negative side, avoid the vices of wine and immorality.
• On the positive side, speak up for the poor and needy; show mercy and compassion to them.
4. Psalm 41:1-2 – David was such a compassionate king.
a. Vs. 1a – He wrote, “Blessed is he that considereth the poor.” There is a divine blessing on all who do.
b. Vs. 1b-2 – That man could expect God’s deliverance when he himself was in trouble or destitute.
c. It is an old Biblical principle: God shows mercy to the merciful.
5. The Old Testament (which Kings were read daily) spoke often of speaking up for the voiceless poor.
a. Deut. 10:16-20 –
• Vs. 16 – This speaks of a regenerated heart – the new birth which brings us a new heart (not the old stubborn, hard heart)
• Vs. 17 – God does not judge according to appearance and does not regard persons.
• Vs. 18 – God cares for the fatherless and widow; for the foreigner; God provides for their needs.
• Vs. 19 – The Jews were commanded to love foreigners in their land because they should remember what it was like to be a stranger in a strange land. They were strangers in Egypt for over 400 years!
• Vs. 20 – The basis or foundation for all of that was to be the fear of God. Those who fear God will be concerned with the “sons of misfortune.”
b. Psalm 82:1-4 – A psalm of Asaph
• God stands in the congregation of the mighty ones.
• The “mighty ones” and “gods” refer to men in positions of political might and power.
• Vs. 2 – God is aware of injustice among the earthly judges.
• Vs. 3 – God’s counsel to these “mighty ones”: defend the poor and the fatherless; do justice to the afflicted and needy.
• God (the Judge of all the earth) is watching. Don’t you dare trample over the poor and the needy. Don’t you dare take advantage of the weak and powerless!
D. Application to Us
1. Prov. 24:11-12 – “If thou forbear to deliver them that are drawn unto death, and those that are ready to be slain; 12If thou sayest, Behold, we knew it not; doth not he that pondereth the heart consider it? and he that keepeth thy soul, doth not he know it? and shall not he render to every man according to his works?”
2. Job 29:15-16 – “I was eyes to the blind, and feet was I to the lame. 16I was a father to the poor: and the cause which I knew not I searched out.
3. I John 3:17-18 – “But whoso hath this world’s good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him? 18My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.”
4. Prov. 14:31 – “He that oppresseth the poor reproacheth his Maker: but he that honoureth him hath mercy on the poor.”
5. Prov. 19:17 – “He that hath pity upon the poor lendeth unto the LORD; and that which he hath given will he pay him again.”
6. Prov. 21:13 – “Whoso stoppeth his ears at the cry of the poor, he also shall cry himself, but shall not be heard.”
7. Prov. 22:22-23 – “Rob not the poor, because he is poor: neither oppress the afflicted in the gate: 23For the LORD will plead their cause, and spoil the soul of those that spoiled them.”
Proverbs 31:9
Plead the Cause of the Poor and Needy
Introduction:
1. Once again, we have before us words of wise advice that Lemuel’s mother is giving to her son, the king.
2. So far she has warned him to avoid immoral women and wine.
3. She has also encouraged him (as king) to open his mouth in defense of the voiceless poor who are appointed to destruction.
4. In verse 9, she encourages her son to “plead the cause of the poor and needy” in the land.
1. This is the second time King Lemuel’s mother encouraged her son to “open his mouth.”
a. She is encouraging him to speak up for others.
b. Vs. 8 – She told him to speak up for the “dumb,” a figure of speech to refer to those who had no voice in society.
c. Vs. 9 is a continuation of the same thought.
2. Judge Righteously
a. As a king, Lemuel also had to function as a judge for the more difficult cases in the land.
b. This kind of power (executive and judicial) in the hands of one man could easily be corrupted for personal gain.
c. The old saying is true: Power corrupts; absolute power corrupts absolutely.
d. Kings had absolute power; hence, they had the ongoing temptation to corruption… using their power to benefit themselves and their cronies, regardless of the hardships it caused for others—like the poor and needy.
e. This fact has been known for many centuries. Lemuel’s mother understood this danger and therefore warned her son.
f. She reminds her son to judge RIGHTEOUSLY.
• Righteous: Justice; right; proper according to the standard; the act of fairly deciding what is right in a legal case, without prejudice.
g. Keep in mind that Lemuel was not a Jewish king.
• It is likely that his mother was a Jewess who was taken as a wife of a foreign king in a political marriage.
• This was very common in those days. It was not in line with the Mosaic Law, but it was a common practice. (consider Solomon)
• Lemuel’s father would have been a pagan, but his mother Jewish. She wanted to safeguard her son against the corruption and evil she saw in her new homeland.
• Judging righteously was not the norm in many lands.
• But Lemuel’s mother evidently knew the Scriptures and wanted her son’s reign to be as righteous as possible… according to God’s standard, not pagan law.
3. Righteous judgment was based on God’s judgments
a. Psalm 7:9 – God Himself judged fairly and justly. He is the Standard.
b. Isaiah 32:1 – “Behold, a king shall reign in righteousness, and princes shall rule in judgment.” This was how Messiah will reign. He is to be the Standard for other kings.
4. Righteous judgment was required by all judges in Israel.
a. Deut. 1:16-17 – “And I charged your judges at that time, saying, Hear the causes between your brethren, and judge righteously between every man and his brother, and the stranger that is with him. 17Ye shall not respect persons in judgment; but ye shall hear the small as well as the great; ye shall not be afraid of the face of man; for the judgment is God’s: and the cause that is too hard for you, bring it unto me, and I will hear it.”
b. Deut. 16:18-20 – Rules for judges and officers in the land.
c. Lev. 19:15 – “Ye shall do no unrighteousness in judgment: thou shalt not respect the person of the poor, nor honour the person of the mighty: but in righteousness shalt thou judge thy neighbor.”
d. II Sam. 8:15 – “And David reigned over all Israel; and David executed judgment and justice unto all his people.” King David exemplified righteous judgment.
5. We are not kings or judges. However, we too are to “judge righteous judgment.”
a. John 7:24 – “Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment.”
b. Most folks know that we are not to judge according to appearance. But most stop there and assume that we are not to judge.
c. However, the Lord COMMANDS us to judge in this passage—as long as it is righteous judgment.
d. It would be unrighteous of us to judge on the basis of appearance only, for appearances can be deceiving.
e. It would be unrighteous of us to attempt to judge a person’s motives, for we do not know a person’s heart.
f. However, we can and should judge words of works… doctrine and practice.
g. Isaiah 8:20 – “To the law and to the testimony: if they speak not according to this word, it is because there is no light in them.”
h. When we judge according to God’s Word, we are not the judge: God is. We are simply pointing out God’s truth.
1. The cause of the poor and needy
a. The “cause of the poor” is one word in Hebrew.
• The term is broader than “poor,” which usually implies poverty in the sense of financial need.
• This term refers to any who are afflicted, oppressed, poor, being in a lowly condition.
b. The “needy” refers to persons who are in “want”; those of a low status and little political power; they have meager means. They are people with needs – and again, the needs could cover a broad range of needs.
c. These two terms are virtually synonyms.
2. Men often forgot the cause of the poor and needy.
a. Ex. 23:6 – “Thou shalt not wrest the judgment of thy poor in his cause.” God had to remind His people NOT to abuse them.
b. Psalm 40:17 – “But I am poor and needy; yet the Lord thinketh upon me: thou art my help and my deliverer; make no tarrying, O my God.”
c. David knew that while men might forsake him in his time of affliction and need, God would not. God is faithful. God THINKS upon the poor and needy.
d. Prov. 30:14 – “There is a generation, whose teeth are as swords, and their jaw teeth as knives, to devour the poor from off the earth, and the needy from among men.”
e. The poor and needy NEEDED someone to defend them against such oppressors. It has always been a sad part of human nature for those in power to oppress the weak.
3. In the second part of our proverb, Lemuel’s mother encourages her son not only to be righteous and just, but that he should aggressively plead the cause of the poor.
a. PLEAD: Bring justice, to go to court, to pass sentence, to contend, to act as judge, to govern, to plead a cause; provide justice for.
b. He was to speak up for them because they couldn’t and no one else would. They did not have friends in high places.
4. The judges in Israel did NOT always plead the cause of the poor and needy.
a. Amos 5:12 – “For I know your manifold transgressions and your mighty sins: they afflict the just, they take a bribe, and they turn aside the poor in the gate from their right.”
b. Jer. 5:28-29 – “They are waxen fat, they shine: yea, they overpass the deeds of the wicked: they judge not the cause, the cause of the fatherless, yet they prosper; and the right of the needy do they not judge. 29Shall I not visit for these things? saith the LORD: shall not my soul be avenged on such a nation as this?”
• In Israel, God took notice; and God took vengeance out on those judges who do not plead the cause of the poor.
c. Jer. 21:12 – “O house of David, thus saith the LORD; Execute judgment in the morning, and deliver him that is spoiled out of the hand of the oppressor, lest my fury go out like fire, and burn that none can quench it, because of the evil of your doings.”
d. Isaiah 1:17 – “Learn to do well; seek judgment, relieve the oppressed, judge the fatherless, plead for the widow.”
• Again we see that righteous judgment (justice) was especially to be applied to the poor and the needy, as in our proverb.
e. The kings in Israel were expected to execute justice and righteous judgments.
f. The Kingdom was BASED on truth, justice, and judgment.
g. They had the command from Scripture, the example of David and other righteous kings, as well as the prophecies of Messiah the King who rules in justice and judgment.
h. Treating people fairly and honestly is important to God and it should be important to us too.
5. We may not be kings or judges, but there will be times when we can use our position to speak up for those under us at work—or others who may have no voice.
a. Perhaps you could say a good word about the one who cleans the office at night…
b. We can take this principle into the realm of befriending the friendless… supporting the weak and the feeble-minded…
Proverbs 31:10
The Virtuous Woman
Introduction:
1. This section of Proverbs is a continuation of the words of advice written by the unnamed mother of Lemuel to her son the king.
a. First she warned her son of evil women (31:3)
b. Now she introduces him to the virtuous woman…what to look for in a woman.
2. This section is an acrostic of 22 sections, each beginning with a letter of the Hebrew alphabet.
3. But this description is not of a particular woman, but is rather a portrait of what a woman should be… the perfect woman… a role model.
4. So don’t be discouraged ladies. You may not meet ALL the character traits listed here; but this is a goal… a godly goal.
5. One commentator (James E. Smith) thought that this section of Proverbs was “intended as a handbook for young people of marriageable age. For the young men it would have served as a checklist of qualities to look for in a prospective bride. For the young ladies it would serve as a kind of handbook to give them the ideal for which they should strive if they were to obtain a husband.”
She is Virtuous
1. Virtuous
a. Defined:
• Brown; Driver; Briggs: The first dictionary meaning is strength; ability, vigor.
• It is the term translated “strength” in Prov. 31:3 (Don’t give your youthful vigor unto immoral women.)
• It also has a related, secondary meaning of moral strength; moral worth.
b. Usage:
• Joel 2:22 – Used of the strength of a vine.
• Ex. 18:25 – Used of “able” men.
• Josh. 1:14 – Used of men of “valor” – valiant men (also mighty men of valor).
• Judges 6:12 – Gideon was described: “And the angel of the LORD appeared unto him, and said unto him, The LORD is with thee, thou mighty man of valour.”
• Psalm 18:32 – David acknowledged that his “strength” came from the Lord: “It is God that girdeth me with strength, and maketh my way perfect.”
• Hab. 3:19 – “The LORD God is my strength, and he will make my feet like hinds’ feet, and he will make me to walk upon mine high places.”
c. The Hebrew term translated “virtuous” is not a perfect parallel to our English word virtuous.
• The most immediate thought that comes to mind when we hear the English word virtuous is “full of virtue.”
• The Hebrew word may imply that, but only secondarily.
• Primarily the term speaks of strength and vitality.
• It speaks of a woman who is strong, fruitful, vibrant, active, full of life and vigor. This is seen throughout the rest of the chapter.
• But it also implies that she is strong morally and spiritually. This too is seen in the description to follow.
d. This is an interesting thought in that so often the world thinks that the Bible’s concept of a woman’s role of submission means that she is to be weak, mindless, spineless doormat, object of pity.
• The world hates the concept of women submitting to their husbands… and view it is a weakness.
• In reality, the Bible’s concept of a godly woman is just the opposite.
• The very first description of the godly woman in THE section in the Bible on that subject is that she is first and foremost STRONG… able… capable… vibrant… skillful… fruitful… accomplished… courageous… valiant…
• She is strong in character and morals and firm in her convictions.
• The picture the Bible actually paints of a godly woman is far different from what many might think.
• This is not a weak lady who sits in a corner, with no mind of her own, doesn’t dare to speak a word, as a second class citizen. That’s what the world thinks of a woman’s role.
• We are going to spend several weeks to consider what the BIBLE says about the exemplary or ideal woman.
• The very first description is that she is a STRONG lady.
• Yes, the New Testament speaks of the woman as a “weaker vessel”—and the emphasis there is physical… and that by way of contrast to a man. This is not a newsflash that women are generally physically weaker than men.
• But women are NOT weaker in other areas – spiritually, morally, mentally, etc.
2. Ruth 3:11 – Ruth is the only woman in the Bible called a “virtuous woman.”
a. Ruth certainly was a virtuous woman. She was a strong woman in every way.
b. She was strong physically. She worked in the fields gathering grain all day long.
c. She was strong spiritually—she was willing to leave her family and her country behind in order to follow Naomi to the land and the god of Israel. God came first.
d. She was strong morally—she followed the Jewish protocol of laying at the feet of her husband to be… but there was no contact.
e. She was strong minded—her sister in law turned back to Moab. That was the most natural thing to do. But Ruth determined to head in a completely different direction. She followed Naomi.
f. She was strong in her loyalty to Naomi. She wouldn’t let her return alone.
g. She was strong in her courage. She lost her husband and now was facing the unknown, traveling to a foreign country. She was no shrinking violet. She was brave. In Judah she walked right into a field full of strangers—and strange men—and went to work. That took some bravery on her part.
h. Clearly Ruth was a virtuous, strong, brave, woman of valor.
i. Ruth 4:11 – Once again the word translated “virtuous” is used as an adverb in this passage and is translated “worthily.”
• It comes as an exhortation from the elders and the people at the gate to Ruth.
• This usage of the term defines or describes HOW she was to “do” – live her life in her new homeland: worthily… strong… vibrant… strong in virtue and morals…
• This usage is similar to its usage in Prov. 31:10.
• It still means strong – and emphasizes being strong in doing WELL…
• Notice that the testimony of this woman. Her strength of character was well known throughout the city. Many were probably the recipients of her worthy life.
3. This is the kind of woman Lemuel’s mother encouraged her son to seek out and find.
a. She says, “Who can find” such a woman?
• That implied that they are not easy to find. Abraham had to send a servant to a faraway land to find a wife for his son.
• They are hard to find, but such women do exist; and they are worth waiting for—worth seeking out—worth finding.
b. She gave her son good advice. “Don’t waste your virtue and strength on wine and immoral women; instead find a virtuous woman!”
She is Valuable
1. The expression Lemuel’s mother uses (“Who can find?”) also implies that she is hard to find.
a. Prov. 20:6 – Just so the ladies don’t feel that they are being discriminated against, the Book of Proverbs says the same about men too: “Most men will proclaim every one his own goodness: but a faithful man who can find?”
b. Such a woman is rare – hard to find.
c. Young people should be aware of this fact. A good and godly spouse is not easy to get. A virtuous woman is like a priceless ruby. If a young man is looking for such a wife—he needs to BE such a man… and vice versa!
2. The question is rhetorical. It means: this woman is rare and therefore priceless… like rubies.
a. Like Lady Wisdom, her worth is far above rubies. (far above!) (3:15)
b. Rubies are valuable because they are rare.
c. Prov. 8:11 – Lady Wisdom is better than rubies; and nothing can be compared to her value.
d. Godly, wise, virtuous women are not easily found… and for that reason, we as men should VALUE them!
3. Prov. 19:14 – houses and riches are inheritances of fathers; but a prudent wife is from the Lord.
a. Every perfect gift comes down from above. Be thankful for your wife!
b. Harry Ironsides wrote: “He finds her love and unselfish affection a treasure so vast that, let his circumstances be as they may, he can never be in poverty.”
4. Prov. 12:4 – She is a CROWN to her husband.
a. A virtuous woman as a wife makes a man feel like a king… he’s proud of her… honored to be seen with her… wants others to know that this is his wife…
b. Her husband is her head, and she is the crown upon his head.
c. A crown is a sign of power invested in the king. A virtuous woman supports her husband’s authority in the home… she is not constantly fighting against it…
d. Her submission to his headship serves as a crown—to accentuate that authority.
e. Her submission to him teaches the children to respect him as head as well…
f. As a crown draws attention to the man wearing it, so too a virtuous wife seeks to draw attention to her husband’s good qualities… and in love covers up the multitude of bad ones… which can become a full time job!
Proverbs 31:11a
The Virtuous Woman is Trustworthy
Introduction:
1. This last section of Proverbs, (vs.10-18) are a continuation of the words from King Lemuel that he learned from his mother.
a. She warned him against wine and women—immoral women. That is what he should avoid.
b. Now she speaks of a virtuous woman – the kind he should seek.
2. We noted last week that the word “virtuous” means strong, capable, vibrant, fruitful – including strength in morals, integrity, virtue, and ability.
3. In vs.11, the next thing we are told about the strong, virtuous woman is that she is trustworthy.
11a The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her
Her Husband
1. This section is actually about the wife, but her husband does receive honorable mention several times.
a. Here we are told that he trusts his virtuous wife.
b. Vs. 12 – The virtuous woman (wife) does this man good. (He is the recipient of her goodness.)
c. Vs. 23 – He is known in the gates. Evidently, he is an important leader in the city. The gates are where the city business was conducted.
d. Vs. 28 – He praises his wife.
2. His heart is mentioned. He trusts his wife in his “heart.”
a. This speaks of the depth of the trust.
b. It is a trust that has sunk deeply into his heart. It is a deep rooted trust.
c. The Hebrew word for “heart” has a broad range of meaning and implications – as does the English word “heart.”
i. In a figurative sense, we usually think of the heart as the seat of emotions – and it does include the emotions.
1. I Sam. 24:5 – “And it came to pass afterward, that David’s heart smote him, because he had cut off Saul’s skirt.” David felt sorrow and guilt in his heart.
ii. But the term also includes the mind.
1. Gen. 6:5 – “And GOD saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually.” Thinking occurs in the heart.
2. Neh.6:8 – “Then I sent unto him, saying, There are no such things done as thou sayest, but thou feignest them out of thine own heart.” Here, the heart seems to speak of the mind and imagination.
iii. The “heart” also includes the will.
1. Ex. 35:5 – “Take ye from among you an offering unto the LORD: whosoever is of a willing heart, let him bring it, an offering of the LORD.”
iv. It might be understood in the sense of the whole inner man… the inner self life… intellect, emotion, and will.
d. The heart is also the center for the concept of “trust.”
i. James 2:19 – For example, many people believe God intellectually – in their head.
1. The demons believe God at that level.
2. But trusting God intellectually only falls far short of saving faith.
3. Faith that is based on facts only can be very clinical and dead.
4. You might liken it to the kind of trust that is the result of putting hundreds of pieces of data into a computer and reading the statistics to determine whether a machine is reliable or not. That kind of trust may be relatively accurate about reliability, but it is not personal.
5. It is a superficial kind of trust. There is no depth.
ii. The concept of trust can also be attributed to emotions.
1. And while this might give a person an inward sense of security, it is not necessarily reliable.
2. Everyone who boards an airplane has a certain level of trust in that machine. Many people FEEL perfectly safe.
3. But the fact is that once in a great while, even though the people trusted in the plane—planes do malfunction and crash.
4. An emotional trust can be wrong – misguided… superficial and not based on facts and truth.
iii. Rom. 10:10 states that “with the heart man believeth unto righteousness.”
1. Faith (to be saving) includes the entire HEART of a man – intellect, emotions, and will.
2. That makes it deep and personal.
3. This includes the correct facts of the gospel; an emotional or inner assent to those facts; and the will is engaged. It is a CHOICE to receive Christ.
e. This might seem like we are getting off subject here, but we mention this to demonstrate the KIND of trust this man had in his wife.
i. His trust in his wife, his confidence in her was deep.
ii. It came from the heart – meaning the entire inner man.
iii. It included his intellect, emotions, and his will.
iv. His trust in his wife was whole… complete… mature… full grown… ripe… entire and lacking nothing.
v. His heart trusted her. He trusted her with his whole heart.
vi. His confidence in her was wholehearted trust: it was sincere… genuine.
3. Intellectually he trusted in her.
a. Intellectually, over the years, his mind had stored many FACTS about her that caused him to trust in her.
b. This kind of trust could even be likened to scientific law – the result of scientific observation. It is a bit clinical, but gives a pretty accurate reading. Drop an apple 10,000 times and if it falls DOWN every time, you have a scientific law on your hands.
c. This man probably put this young lady to the test while he courted her and she passed the test.
d. Now they are married with children and have lived together for many years – every day of life together (observing the relationship and one another) gives more objective facts: she has been trustworthy all these years!
e. He has listened to her speech over the years and has observed that she always tells the truth. She has never lied to him. She doesn’t stretch the truth. Her word is like gold.
f. Vs. 15 – He has observed her work ethic over the years. If she has a job to do, she does it. He doesn’t have to worry about whether the job gets done or not. Even if she has to get up before the sun to finish the task, she does it.
g. He trusts her fully because he has observed her trustworthiness over many years. He can trust in her as much as he can trust in gravity. They have both been intellectually PROVEN to him.
h. His intellect is full of facts that confirm her reliability.
4. He trusts in her emotionally.
a. Trust and confidence require the correct facts. Faith RESTS upon facts. His faith in his wife rests upon intellectual facts too.
b. But, for faith to be deep, it requires the assent of the emotions. (A man might intellectually believe all the facts of the gospel, and have no heart attachment to it… refuse to assent to those facts inwardly.)
c. This man’s emotions have been stirred by his wife’s trustworthiness and his heart therefore has become ATTACHED to her and her faithfulness.
d. He trusts in her with his whole heart. This is much deeper than mere clinical facts—as reliable as those facts may be.
e. This man trusts in his virtuous wife in his head AND in his heart.
5. He trusts in her volitionally.
a. Faith and trust also include the will. It is a choice.
b. So too with the gospel. The head might intellectually believe the facts of the gospel. The heart might be stirred emotionally by the message, but unless a man CHOOSES to receive Christ personally, he is completely lost.
c. This man’s trust in his wife was also ACTED upon.
d. The fact that he (as head of the household) put her in charge of important duties indicates that he acted upon his confidence in her.
e. Vs. 16 – She was trusted with the family money to buy a field.
f. Vs. 20 – She was trusted with the family money to use that money prudently in giving to the poor.
g. He didn’t say, “I trust you with the money, but I’ll do it myself or find someone else to make the big purchases.”
h. Her husband trusted her fully and that trust and confidence was translated into action.
i. He made decisions based on his absolute trust and confidence in his wife.
He safely trusted in her…
1. BECAUSE he trusted in her fully, the relationship was characterized by “safety.”
a. Safety: The feeling or experience of safety and security; a sense of well being.
b. Because of this sense of confidence and well being, he did not have to live in fear.
c. Usage of “safety.”
i. Ps. 112:7 – “He shall not be afraid of evil tidings: his heart is fixed, trusting in the LORD.”
1. When we trust in the Lord, there is no need to fear.
2. What can man do to us if God is on our side?
3. If God be for us, who shall be against us?
4. A husband who fully trusts his wife doesn’t have to fear. He doesn’t have to live in anxiety wondering whether she has been faithful to him. He has no fear that she will embarrass him with her speech or behavior. He doesn’t live in fear wondering whether she is up to no good… secretly spending money behind his back, etc.
5. Trust removes fear and anxiety.
6. I couldn’t imagine living in a relationship when you can’t trust your wife. Thank God for trustworthy wives!
ii. Isa. 26:3 – “Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee.”
1. The word translated “trusteth” here is the same word translated “safely trusts” in Prov. 31:11.
2. When a person trusts in God, he experiences perfect peace.
3. Perfect peace is because of this kind of confident trust…
4. Who wouldn’t want “perfect peace” in a marriage? Well the Bible tells us HOW perfect peace is achieved: through total confidence in another!
5. Therefore BE trustworthy beyond reproach—even in the little things.
iii. Isa. 32:17 – “And the work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance for ever.”
1. The word “assurance” here is the same word as “safely trusts” in Prov. 31:11.
2. Isaiah teaches us that in the Kingdom, things will be done justly and righteously. The result of knowing that things will be done right is quietness and assurance.
3. Again, who wouldn’t want quietness and assurance in their home?
4. Then do things RIGHT consistently so that your partner can have absolute confidence in you.
d. In any husband/wife relationship, TRUST is essential!
i. It results in a sense of safety and well being.
ii. It removes fear and anxiety.
iii. It brings perfect peace to a relationship.
iv. It brings blessed quietness and assurance and safety into the home.
v. Without trust, the relationship is characterized by “rottenness of the bones.”
2. Trust is the FOUNDATION of any relationship – between God and the believer OR husband and wife.
a. When the trust is eroded, the relationship is on very shaky ground. The foundation is cracked and needs to be repaired right away before something worse happens.
b. The virtuous woman earned the confidence of her husband.
c. And over time, that confidence only grew deeper, stronger, and wider.
d. A husband/wife relationship should strengthen over time.
e. One of the quickest ways to destroy a relationship is to prove yourself to be a liar… a cheat… unreliable… sneaky… sly… undependable… erratic… unpredictable… untruthful…
f. One of the best things you can do for your relationship is to keep on building up that confidence and trust.
g. When that foundation is deep and strong—no outward circumstances or storms of life will be able to undermine it.
h. The virtuous woman never gave her husband the least occasion to suspect her of evil or to distrust her in any way.
3. The husband in Proverbs 31:11 doth “safely trust in her.” Those are extremely powerful words.
Proverbs 31:12
She will Do Him Good
Introduction:
1. This last section of Proverbs deals with the virtuous woman.
2. We noted that the word translated “virtuous” primarily means strong.
3. She is a strong woman—morally and spiritually. She is strong in her work ethic, strong in her family ties, and tonight we want to see that she is strong in her support for her husband and strong in her sense of commitment.
1. Gen. 2:18 – This was the purpose God made the woman and brought her unto the man—that she might be a helpmeet to him.
a. A help-meet is a helper that is meet, fitting, or suitable to man.
b. God brought all the animals before Adam but there was nothing in the animal kingdom that corresponded to Adam; none corresponded to him or were suitable to him.
c. Sorry dog lovers, but there could never be any spiritual fellowship with an animal.
d. But God made woman – a creature made in the image of God as Adam was made.
e. The woman corresponded to man because they both had intellect, emotion, will, and a conscience… body, soul, and spirit.
f. They are perfectly suited for one another.
g. Woman is man’s helper. (helpmeet)
• The Hebrew word means helper, one who assists and serves; one who supplies what is needed; one who supplies needed strength and ability to accomplish a task.
• In several passages, God refers to Himself the “helper” (helpmeet) of Israel.
• This has been God’s design from the beginning – even before sin entered the world in Genesis three.
• Gen. 1:26 – They were created as co-regents to have dominion TOGETHER over the world. They were a team – like a king and queen with dominion over the whole earth.
• The concept of being a “helper” to man was NOT part of the curse.
• Women might think of it so today, but that is not the case.
• It was part of God’s original, perfect design for man and woman (husband and wife) before sin entered the world.
2. The virtuous woman “does him good.”
a. This corresponds to God’s original purpose for marriage.
b. She does him good in the sense of doing good things… helpful things… meeting needs…
c. The Hebrew term good has a very broad meaning – like the English word for “good.”
d. Incorporated in the Hebrew term is the concepts of “correct, proper, gracious, joyful, kind, pleasant, pleasure, well pleasing, precious, prosperity, sweet, welfare, profitable, well favored, etc.”
e. The virtuous woman is all of that to her husband.
f. This is what she DOES.
• The verb translated “do” in our passage is a little more restricted in meaning than our English word “do.”
• It implies “dealing out something,” or “dealing bountifully” with someone.
• I Sam. 24:17 – “And he said to David, Thou art more righteous than I: for thou hast rewarded me good, whereas I have rewarded thee evil.”
» This is the very same expression as “do good” in Proverbs.
» Note that the word “do” is translated “rewarded.”
» Notice another related principle in this passage: good is to be done to others (husbands) even if they don’t deserve it – even if they are not returning the kindness… even if they are doing evil.
» Rom. 12:17 – This is godliness: “recompense no man evil for evil.” (see also I Thess. 5:15)
» This is especially to be the case in marriage.
» I Sam. 25:18-27 – Abigail was such a virtuous woman – who bestowed good on her husband even when he did not deserve it. Her husband was a fool, and Abigail did her best to prevent disaster for him.
• Isa. 63:7 – “I will mention the lovingkindnesses of the LORD, and the praises of the LORD, according to all that the LORD hath bestowed on us, and the great goodness toward the house of Israel, which he hath bestowed on them according to his mercies, and according to the multitude of his lovingkindnesses.”
» Here the term translated “do” is translated “bestow.”
» The subject here is God bestowing blessings on His people.
» In Proverbs, the virtuous woman is manifesting godliness. Her behavior is like that of God – bestowing good on others, namely, her husband.
• Psalm 13:6 – “I will sing unto the LORD, because he hath dealt bountifully with me.”
» Again, this is godly behavior for God Himself “does good” (dealt out) a bounty to others.
3. The virtuous woman bestows good towards her husband in many ways.
a. She is his encourager when he’s down in the dumps and discouraged.
b. She is his comforter when he’s feeling blue.
c. She is his assistant and extra pair of eyes, arms, and legs.
d. She is his supporter and cheerleader.
e. She is his keeper at home… and decorator in chief.
f. She is his mild rebuke and restrainer… like Abigail… when the husband behaves like Nabal.
g. She is his faithful companion and lover and his heart doth safely trust in her.
h. She is his counselor who sees the world through a different set of eyes (a woman’s eyes) and adds a whole new dimension to his life.
i. The list is endless. She does him good in countless ways.
j. She seeks to be pleasing to him. That’s how Paul defines a wife: “she that is married careth for the things of the world (earth), that she may please her husband.” She does him good and that is well pleasing.
1. The virtuous woman “does him good” which is a description of her godliness.
a. Some might think this is like being a doormat.
b. The Bible says it is being like God Himself – a helper… a bestower of good even to the undeserving… one who deals bountifully with His people… a rewarder with good.
c. The virtuous woman is a godly woman.
d. She bestows grace, kindness, joy, prosperity, pleasantness, pleasure, and goodness to him.
e. The rest of the chapter deals with the many good DEEDS she does as a helper to her husband and family.
f. The author gives us a long list of the good things she does for him and her family; we will consider the particulars later.
2. She does NOT do him “evil.”
a. This term for evil is much broader in meaning than our English word. It is not confined to that which is immoral or wicked.
b. It is obviously used in contrast to the “good” and thus implies all kinds of bad things.
c. The word for evil includes the concepts of calamity, disaster, distress, misery, injury, etc.
d. A strong, virtuous woman is the source of good things (grace, joy, pleasure, prosperity) and not the source of bad things – like trouble and misery.
e. The book of Proverbs speaks of some of the ways in which a woman can do “evil” (make misery) for her husband.
• Prov. 12:4 – “She that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.” A woman who is not virtuous can bring shame to her husband… which produces calamity and misery for him, here described as “rottenness in his bones.” That is deep, deep rottenness.
• Prov. 21:19 – “It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.”
» Instead of doing good and being the source of joy and pleasure, a woman can be the source of contention and anger in the home.
» That is certainly not a virtuous woman.
• Prov. 27:15 – “A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.”
» This contentious woman is like a continual dropping.
» She keeps on bringing up old issues and never lets things die. She is a nag.
» This is a miserable way to live. It utterly destroys the sweet and pleasant atmosphere a home should have.
» This woman is not the bestower of good to her husband… but evil.
3. The Bible gives us examples of wives who bestowed evil upon their husbands.
a. Eve tempted Adam.
b. Jezebel influenced Ahab into committing murder, lying, and worshipping Baal.
c. Solomon’s wives drew his heart away from God.
d. Job’s wife encouraged him to curse God and die.
e. Not all wives do their husbands good; some do them evil.
1. Here we see the virtuous woman’s dedication.
a. Her dedication to her husband is life-long – till death do us part.
b. Her dedication is not just to remain married to him, but she is dedicated to being a “helpmeet” for him and to do him GOOD for the rest of her life.
c. She does him good in season and out of season… in the early days of marriage and on into the “golden years.”
2. It is a lifelong commitment.
a. “All the days of her life” includes the good days and the bad days – for better or for worse… and there will be plenty of both.
b. It includes the days of sickness and health.
c. It includes the days of plenty and days of poverty – for richer or for poorer.
d. It includes the days of sunshine as well as the stormy days.
e. This woman is virtuous; and she is faithful.
f. Note that it says that she WILL do; not that she might do if she feels like it; or if he has been good; or if she gets her way.
g. This is part of the life-long commitment that a woman makes to her husband before God when she gets married.
h. If you are not ready and willing to enter into this kind of lifelong commitment, then don’t get married.
3. This woman was virtuous: a bestower of good and dedicated to fulfilling her God given purpose as a helpmeet – doing him good all the days of her life.
Proverbs 31:13
She Works Willingly with her Hands
Introduction: In our passage tonight we learn that the virtuous (strong; capable) woman is a willing worker. She works with her hands.
A. WOOL
1. In Bible times (and even today) there were and are many who tend sheep in the Middle East in rural regions.
2. Sheep have been a mainstay of life in Bible times both for food and clothing.
3. The Hebrew word translated “wool” refers to “the soft, curly hair of sheep or of other animals with hair of the same or similar texture. It was used in the production of clothing.”
4. The wool from the sheep was used to make various kinds of yarn and thread for making clothing.
5. Wool made a very heavy, warm type of clothing.
6. Prov. 31:21 – This woman was not afraid of the snow for her family! Her family had homemade, warm wool clothing. She was making warm, woolen shirts and coats long before the Pendleton Company in Oregon starting making them!
B. FLAX
1. Flax was a fiber also used in making clothing.
2. Flax was used especially for making fine linen.
3. While wool was used to make thicker, heavier, and warmer clothing, flax was used in making lighter, finer clothing.
4. Prov. 31:22 – Linen from flax was used in making fine tapestries for beauty, decorations, and clothing.
5. Prov. 31:24 – This strong, capable woman also not only sought out the flax, but manufactured it into linen – into fine linen.
C. She SEEKETH after wool and flax
1. SEEKETH:
a. Defined: To seek with great care; to follow; to ask for; search out; examine; care for.
b. Deut. 22:2 – It was used of seeking after a lost ox or cattle.
c. This woman sought after wool and flax.
• This could mean that she planted and took care of the crops.
» The term “seeketh” can mean to “care for.”
» Deut. 11:12 – “A land which the LORD thy God careth for: the eyes of the LORD thy God are always upon it, from the beginning of the year even unto the end of the year.”
» God “cared for” (same word) the land.
» Joshua 2:6 – “But she had brought them up to the roof of the house, and hid them with the stalks of flax, which she had laid in order upon the roof.”
→ Here we see that a woman (Rahab) who hid the two men in Jericho, was the one who had gathered in the flax and piled it up on the roof.
→ It was her responsibility to care for the flax.
» In Prov. 31:13, this term (seek with care) could be understood to mean that the virtuous woman cared for the sheep and their wool and she cared for the land and the flax growing on it and cared for bringing in and piling up the flax.
• Or (as the next verse suggests) she could have sought them out in the marketplace or in nearby cities. (vs. 14)
» Ezek. 27:18 – It was considered a very valuable commodity in Tyrus. It was shipped far and wide.
» It was sought after worldwide because of its value.
2. The virtuous woman sought far and wide for the best wool and flax she could get.
a. She wanted the best for her family.
b. In the cold, damp weather, they had the warmest wool clothing.
c. In the hot weather, they had the lightest and finest of linen.
d. Their home had beautiful linen tapestries and linen curtains. And perhaps some smaller ones were embroidered onto their clothing to make them look sharp and stylish.
e. Ex. 26:1 – “Moreover thou shalt make the tabernacle with ten curtains of fine twined linen, and blue, and purple, and scarlet.”
• Fine linen is what was used to beautify the Tabernacle.
f. The virtuous woman took good care of her family and her home. She was interested in quality, practicality, and beauty.
1. The first thing we note here is that the virtuous woman worked.
2. WORK: To do; to make; to manufacture; to labor; to perform a task.
3. USAGE:
a. Used of “making” graven images (Ex. 20:4).
b. Used of “preparing” a feast (Esther 5:4).
c. Used of “working” metals into usable objects (Ex. 31:4) as used in the Tabernacle.
d. It has a wide range of usages.
4. The virtuous, strong, capable woman worked.
a. She made things that were useful for her family.
b. This chapter mentions many of the things that she “made,” like clothing, candles, crops, etc.
5. The virtuous woman worked with her hands.
a. Women in Bible times were to be busy, diligent, and hard workers.
b. Their lives were not monastic… not a religious recluse.
• They did not sit in a corner and read the Bible, go to Bible studies, go to Temple activities, and pray all day.
• We certainly don’t want to diminish the vital importance of the Word, prayer, or worship, for the believer.
• Life does consist of those things, but also those things are to be put into action.
• We are to be DOERS of the word. Love is an action verb, not a state of being verb.
6. Women in Bible times worked with their hands in various ways.
a. Gen. 16:6-8 – Sarah was ready at a minutes notice to go prepare food for the visitors—one of whom was the Lord!
b. Gen. 24:13 – Here it was the custom for “the daughters of the men of the city come out to draw water.”
c. Gen. 29:9 – Rachel was a shepherdess. She kept her father’s sheep and probably turned the wool into warm clothing.
d. Ex. 2:16 – “Now the priest of Midian had seven daughters: and they came and drew water, and filled the troughs to water their father’s flock.” These women drew water and carried it to the water troughs to water the flock.
e. Ruth 2:2 – “And Ruth the Moabitess said unto Naomi, Let me now go to the field, and glean ears of corn.” Ruth was also the only specific woman in the Bible called “virtuous” (strong; capable). She worked hard in the fields gathering in the crops.
f. Acts 9:39 – “all the widows stood by him weeping, and shewing the coats and garments which Dorcas made, while she was with them.” Dorcas manufactured clothing and gave it to those in need.
g. I Tim. 5:10 – “Well reported of for good works; if she have brought up children, if she have lodged strangers, if she have washed the saints’ feet, if she have relieved the afflicted, if she have diligently followed every good work.” Only the diligent, hardworking widows were to be helped financially by the assembly.
h. Titus 2:5 – “To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.”
• In addition to drawing water, filling the water troughs, tending the sheep, gleaning the fields, making clothing of wool and fine linen from flax, the women in Bible times also were housekeepers!
• They kept care of their house and their household – the people in it.
• These were very hard working women.
• They worked with their hands.
• Their days and nights were filled with chores to do. They never stopped.
• It would not be fair or accurate to say that women in the Bible did not work. They DID work and they worked hard—with their hands.
7. She worketh WILLINGLY with her hands.
a. Willingly: Defined: The primary meaning of this term is “delight; pleasure; good pleasure; longing; desire; to be pleased to do.”
b. In I Kings 9:1, it is used of Solomon’s pleasure in building the Temple.
8. The virtuous woman worked hard with her hands, and DELIGHTED in what she did.
a. It gave her a sense of satisfaction and fulfillment to be able to help her husband and her family.
b. She made them warm clothing was pleased to see them warm in cold weather.
c. She made them fine linen clothes and was pleased to see how good they looked and how comfortable their clothing was. That gave her pleasure.
d. She gathered in the crops and took pleasure in her part of the whole process that put food on the table.
e. She made fine tapestries from the linen to decorate her house and was pleased to be able to turn her house into a home.
f. She worked hard to be able to give to her husband and family, and she was a cheerful giver and a cheerful worker.
g. She sacrificed a lot of time, energy, and effort tending sheep, drawing water, making clothing and tapestries, but she did so willingly and cheerfully out of LOVE.
h. Love sacrifices self for the good of others. The virtuous woman loved her family and her love was demonstrated in deeds… in hours of labor and toil.
9. In the modern world, some things have changed; but some things should remain the same.
a. Today, it is probably more expensive to make clothing than to buy it. (After you buy the pattern, material, thread, yarn, buttons, etc.)
b. Most Christian ladies don’t live in an agricultural setting… yes, even in New Hampshire.
c. But some of the qualities of this woman should be manifested today:
• She was a diligent worker. She didn’t sit around watching TV all day.
• She worked with her hands. Some of the women’s work was very difficult (working in the fields; etc.)
» It was not beneath her to get her hands dirty.
• Her motive in working was to help her husband and family.
» She wasn’t trying to get rich or accumulate wealth.
» She wanted to help her husband.
» Some women may find it necessary to work outside the home today in order to help their husbands and households financially.
• This godly woman was PLEASED to be able to help.
» She was not a grumbler and a complainer.
» She wasn’t forced to work.
» Warren Wiersbe put it this way: She worked not out of compulsion but out of compassion for her family.
» She finds genuine JOY in serving her family and making them comfortable.
• She did what she could to see to it that her family wore fine clothing (not rags) warm in the cold; cool in heat.
• She worked hard to turn her house into a comfortable and attractive home.
• She was interested in quality, practicality, and beauty for her family and home.
• She didn’t focus on accumulating wealth and living lavishly. That was not her adorning.
• I Tim. 2:9-10 – “In like manner also, that women adorn themselves… not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.”
Proverbs 31:14
The Merchants’ Ships
Introduction:
1. This proverb continues to describe the virtuous woman… the strong, capable, noble woman.
2. Here she is described as a diligent, shrewd, and capable shopper.
3. She is likened to the merchants’ ships.
The Merchant Ships in the Bible
1. II Chron. 9:10-14 – They brought in on their merchant ships gold and algum trees. These were unusual trees that made the finest musical instruments. Because of his merchant ships, Solomon had available whatever the Queen of Sheba wanted.
2. II Chron. 9:21-24 – They imported gold, silver, ivory, apes, and peacocks. These were exotic, imported items from faraway places.
3. Ezekiel 27:3-25 – Merchant ships brought all kinds of items from every place in the known world at the time. They imported the very best other nations had to offer.
4. Revelation 18:12-13 – The merchant ships made virtually all of the specialty and luxury items available to the Babylon of the last days.
5. The merchant ships sailed all around the world seeking out the best foods, the best material, the best crafted items, the best precious metals, the best clothing, the best tapestries, the best furniture, the best spices,—the best of everything!
6. They brought back to the homeland exotic items from afar that were unique and unusual. You don’t send ships half way across the world to bring back run of the mill, everyday, ordinary items.
7. They brought back food, clothing, decorations for the home, jewelry, and luxury items.
8. Merchant ships traveled the world seeking DEALS. They wanted to be able to bring home goods that would bring them a profit. The merchants sought to pay little and get a lot.
1. The virtuous woman is LIKE the merchant ships.
a. She too sought out the best deals.
• She traveled afar to get the best price for their hard earned money.
• Like the merchant ships, she went wherever she had to go to find what her family needed at a good price.
• But she wasn’t foolish. Merchant ships did not spend more seeking and buying unique items than they could sell them for. They had to make a profit.
• To put it in modern terms, the virtuous woman didn’t spend $50.00 on gas to save $10.00 on a sale. She was like the merchants—efficient—practical—and profitable for her family.
b. Being LIKE the merchants ships may imply that the virtuous woman went about TRADING.
• She manufactured things in the home.
» She made clothing (vs. 21).
» She made tapestries (vs. 22).
» She made linen and girdles (sashes; belts) and sold them (vs.2 4).
• She may have traded them for other more exotic items from various marketplaces.
• Merchant ships often carried goods made domestically and sold them or traded them for unusual items to bring back home.
• She was like the merchants ships in that she was (in a sense) an exporter and an importer!
• She made things, sold them, and traded them for the good of her family. She was a hard worker.
• This capable woman sees opportunities to sell her goods at a profit for her family. The profit comes in fine goods, exotic goods, and better to best quality items for the family she loves and works so hard to make comfortable.
c. The ships went on long journeys to obtain unique items. The virtuous woman also went far and wide—on shopping trips to find unique items for her home and for her family.
• She may have travelled to the port cities to see what items the ships brought into port.
• She may have traveled to the villages in the hill country to get the best meat for her family meals.
• She may have traveled to another city to find the best linen for clothing.
• She may have traveled to another city to find craftsmen who made the best furnishings for her home.
• She went down to the marketplace daily because she wanted to get the freshest vegetables for her meals… and the best spices.
2. The virtuous woman took her responsibilities as “homemaker” seriously.
a. She didn’t settle for “good enough to get by.”
b. She wanted to find the very best she could afford.
c. She was diligent and hard working.
• She went far and wide to find the best—even if it took her all day to go get it. She did not have a car.
• She wasn’t lazy. She did a lot of research, leg work, and comparisons to make sure that she was getting a good deal.
• She was a wise shopper… like a shrewd merchant.
• Prov. 13:11 – “Wealth gotten by vanity shall be diminished: but he that gathereth by labour shall increase.” She increased the family wealth through her diligence.
• Prov. 31:27 – “She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.”
• This woman must have walked many miles to and fro to the market and even to other cities to gather her goods.
d. She sought out the best for her family’s clothing.
• She didn’t want her children or husband to look sloppy and disheveled, dirty, or unkempt.
• She saw this as part of her testimony and the testimony of her family.
• Vs. 21 – They were dressed in scarlet.
• To apply this to today, the virtuous woman shops far and wide for the best price and the best quality in clothing.
e. She sought out the best for her family’s meals.
• She gathered her food from afar.
• She was continually trying to please her husband and family.
• In today’s terms, she would travel to the Jewish deli to get the best meats; and to the Italian bakery to get the best breads; and then off to the farm stand to get fresh corn and tomatoes; and then a stop at the Hipke’s for some fresh eggs!
• She wanted a good variety of foods for her family.
• She could have made one stop at the Walmart superstore, but she wanted the best for her family. Their meats and vegetables weren’t that good.
• Prov. 6:6-8 – “Go to the ant, thou sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise: 7Which having no guide, overseer, or ruler, 8Provideth her meat in the summer, and gathereth her food in the harvest.”
• Perhaps this woman studied the ants and decided to go out and gather the best foods she could!
f. She sought out the best for her home decorations.
• She may have made plans to be at the port when she knew the ships were coming in and bought directly from the merchants to get the best and most unique items she could for her home.
• She sought after just the right color tapestry for a wall hanging; just the right feathers for her featherbed; just the right incense; just the right chair for the living room.
• Prov. 21:20 – “There is treasure to be desired and oil in the dwelling of the wise; but a foolish man spendeth it up.” There were treasures in this lady’s home – because she worked hard to make merchandise she could sell for a profit, and then she went out to trade her goods, and found treasures to bring home!
3. What comes across in this chapter is the motive of the virtuous woman: she desired to please her husband and make her family as comfortable, well fed, and well dressed as she could.
a. Her shopping was not done out of vanity.
b. It wasn’t done to show off.
c. It was not done out of covetousness or selfishness.
d. She was not trying to keep up with the Joneses.
e. It was done for others – for her family. That’s a pretty good description of agape love in action.
Proverbs 31:15
She Rises While It Is Yet Night
Introduction:
1. Lemuel is describing the virtuous (strong; noble; capable) woman.
2. So far we have learned several things about her.
a. Vs. 10 – She is valuable—like rubies.
b. Vs. 11 – She is trustworthy.
c. Vs. 12 – She did good deeds for her husband her whole life.
d. Vs. 13 – She was a willing worker and made clothing for her family for all seasons.
e. Vs. 14 – She was a diligent and wise shopper.
f. Vs. 15 – Tonight we are going to learn a bit more about the work ethic of the virtuous woman.
1. The virtuous woman was an early riser.
a. She got up very early in the morning, when it is still dark out. She rose up before the sun and before the roosters.
b. This fact is part of what makes her a virtuous woman – a hardworking, noble, capable woman.
c. Obviously, different people have different schedules.
2. However, the Bible does speak of rising early as a virtue.
a. Psalm 119:146-148 – The psalmist “prevented” (preceded) the dawning of the morning.
• He rose up before sunlight, like the virtuous woman.
• He rose up early because he wanted to “cry unto the Lord” in prayer for all the burdens on his heart. That was the best time for him.
• He also rose up early so that he might meditate on God’s Word.
• In the morning it was quiet; the hustle and bustle of the day had not yet begun.
• In the morning he had the time and the quiet to think… to meditate… pray to God and bring his requests to the throne of grace… and to read God’s Word AND to hear from God.
• Psalm 5:3 – “My voice shalt thou hear in the morning, O LORD; in the morning will I direct my prayer unto thee, and will look up.”
b. Mark 1:35 – This was the practice of the Lord Jesus as well.
• He Lord also rose before the sun. Note that He arose a “great while before” day dawned.
• Then He went to seek out a quiet, solitary place… and there He prayed.
• Vs. 33-34 – Jesus knew that all day long He would likely be surrounded by a mob of people.
• Therefore He arose early seeking for peace and quiet to get alone with the Father before another hectic day of ministry began.
• He sought a solitary place because He didn’t want to be disturbed.
• John 6:46 – “And when he had sent them away, he departed into a mountain to pray.”
• John 6:15 – “When Jesus therefore perceived that they would come and take him by force, to make him a king, he departed again into a mountain himself alone.” There were burdens on His heart over the dullness of the people. He needed to get alone with His Father in prayer.
• It is good and needful to get alone with God each day.
• That’s what the Lord did; that’s what the psalmist did; and that’s what the virtuous woman did.
• Early morning may not fit into your schedule. But choose the best time and be faithful.
• Biographers tell us that Susanna Wesley (who had 17 children) used to sit in the corner in a rocking chair and put her apron over her head in order to block out all the commotion in the house so that she could have her quiet time with God each day.
c. Proverbs 20:13 – “Love not sleep, lest thou come to poverty; open thine eyes, and thou shalt be satisfied with bread.”
• Prov. 19:15 – “Slothfulness casteth into a deep sleep; and an idle soul shall suffer hunger.”
• This woman did not love sleep; she got up before the sun!
• As a result, she did not come to poverty. Nor did she or her household suffer hunger.
• And she and her household (including her maidens) were “satisfied with bread.” They had plenty to eat as a direct result of her diligence.
A. She Gave Food to Her Household
1. Note also that this was a well-to-do woman.
a. She had maidens – female household servants.
b. She didn’t have to get up early but she did.
c. She could have stayed in bed and had her maidens take care of whatever needed attention early in the morning.
2. She got up early to prepare food for her family.
a. Meat: This is an old English word for “food.” (As in the meat offerings in the Old Testament which actually contained no meat; they were grain or food offerings.)
b. This woman arose early to prepare breakfast for her family.
c. Again, she was a wealthy woman with servants.
d. She could have told her servants to prepare breakfast. Most wealthy ladies would say, “Why should I get up? What do I have maidens for if not to do that kind of work?”
e. But getting up early to do it herself was an act of selfless, sacrificial LOVE.
• Vs. 14 – It was also an act of love to bring her food from afar—because she wanted the best for her family.
• Vs. 13 – It was an act of love for her to make wool and linen cloth for her family—so they would be prepared for both hot and cold weather.
• Vs. 13 – It was also an act of love for her to work willingly with her own hands—when she as a wealthy woman could have had her maidens do all the work for her.
f. The fact that she prepared breakfast for her family when she didn’t have to accentuates her virtue.
• A poor woman would have to get up early to feed her family breakfast.
• But a rich woman who didn’t have to but did so out of love highlights this woman as being noble, honorable, gracious, and loving.
• Of course the young children would probably never appreciate all the things that their mother did for them that she didn’t have to.
• That is they wouldn’t appreciate it until they grew up and had their own family and realized how hard she worked… how much she did… even when she didn’t have to.
3. Another point to consider is the meaning of the word “household”
a. Dictionary of Bible Languages defines this Hebrew term as: “a very small unit of a clan or tribe, consisting of parents, children, close relatives, including servants, living in relatively close proximity.”
b. If we apply the common meaning of the word “household” to our proverb, [(1) the family members, (2) extended family members, as well as (3) household servants] then we are forced to conclude that this woman also prepared breakfast for her servants… the maidens.
c. That would be highly unusual for a wealthy woman.
d. If that is the case here, we see a noble, honorable, virtuous woman going the extra mile.
e. We are told here that this wealthy woman with household servants got up early to prepare food for her household servants when they should have been up early preparing food for her!
f. This is a remarkable expression of love—sacrificing self for the good of others.
B. She Gave a “Portion” to Her Maidens
1. This expression serves as a good illustration to us all as to WHY we need to look up words in a Bible dictionary when doing Bible studies on our own.
a. Reading the text as translated here one might assume that this woman prepared food for her family and in addition, she gave a portion of that food to her maidens.
b. The first part of the proverb indicates that she gave food to her maidens—but not this expression.
c. “Portion” here does not mean a portion of the food. A quick trip to the dictionary will tell us that.
2. Portion defined:
a. Complete Word Study Dictionary: A masculine noun meaning regulation, law, ordinance, decree, custom. Primarily, this word represents an expectation or mandate prescribed by decree or custom.
b. Dictionary of Bible Languages: Regulation, decree, statute, ordinance, i.e., a clear communicated prescription of what one should do.
c. It can also mean a “quota.” This definition is what caused many translations to translate the word as “portion.”
d. But that is not the most common usage of the term.
e. The most common usage is “regulations; commands; instructions as to what to do.”
3. Using the most common meaning for the term indicates that this woman rose up early to (1) feed her family and her maidens and also to (2) give “instructions” to her maidens. (their work assignments for the day).
a. In other words, after feeding her maidens, she used their labors wisely and efficiently.
b. The virtuous woman had plans and goals to accomplish each day.
c. Evidently, she had already prepared the instructions for each maiden the night before. She had already thought out and perhaps wrote down a “to do” list to give to her maidens each morning.
d. She did this because she was a diligent leader of her maidens and wanted to use their talents in a most effective manner.
e. This woman was disciplined; organized; a good planner; a wise and efficient manager. She redeemed the time.
f. As a result of this, she got a lot of work done each day (1) from her own labors and (2) from managing her maidens well.
g. To use the words of the apostle Paul, she was “Not slothful in business; fervent in spirit; serving the Lord.”
4. And it is likely that her maidens were only too happy to do the chores she had arranged for them to do that day.
a. Why? Because this woman (their “boss”) wasn’t a mean tyrant who sat around sipping lemonade and delighted in ordering others to do all the work.
b. No. She set the example.
• She too was a hard worker. Her servants would have seen her working too.
• This noble, capable, virtuous woman—a wealthy lady—did not set herself above her maidens.
• She worked with them. They would have appreciated that.
c. And they knew that she loved them. It showed.
• Vs. 26 – the law of kindness was in her mouth. She didn’t yell and scream at them. She was kind and gracious.
• Besides, she got up early to cook breakfast for them! No other wealthy lady did that.
• And even though she had high standards and expected a lot from them, they were happy to serve her – because she also served them.
5. This woman greatly added to the wealth, security, the well-being, and order to her household.
a. Between her diligence, early rising, good management skills, her wise and diligent shopping, her organizational skills, and her care for her maidens, it is no wonder that she was a wealthy woman and that her family was dressed in scarlet!
b. Her diligence, wisdom, and organizational skills added greatly to the wealth and wellbeing of her family.
c. She is a woman to be praised.
Proverbs 31:16-17
She Buys a Field and Plants a Vineyard
Review: So far we have learned several things about the virtuous woman:
→ Vs. 10 – She is valuable—like rubies.
→ Vs. 11 – She is trustworthy.
→ Vs. 12 – She did good deeds for her husband her whole life.
→ Vs. 13 – She was a willing worker and made clothing for her family.
→ Vs. 14 – She was a diligent and wise shopper.
→ Vs. 15 – She rises early to minister to her family and servants and organizes the day’s chores.
→ Vs. 16-17 – Tonight we will consider what she does with the fruit of her labors.
1. In this passage, the goal she had in mind was to plant a vineyard.
a. This was work outside of her house.
b. But the goal of planting a vineyard was clearly for the benefit of her family and her household.
c. We just saw in vs. 15 that she is the one who rises early in the morning to provide breakfast for her family.
d. Evidently she believed that her household would be benefited by having their own vineyard.
• Perhaps the cost of grapes was becoming excessive and she thought that she could grow grapes much cheaper.
• Wine was used to sweeten the water.
• Fresh grape juice was a real treat—a delight.
• We learned from vs. 14 that she traveled far and wide to provide the best products for her family.
• If she had her own vineyard, she could save money, and perhaps save the long trips to someone else’s vineyard to buy their grape juice or wine.
• She would have the freshest grape juice possible.
• It could save her time and money.
2. All of this was preceded by the fact that “she considered a field.”
a. She had her eye on a piece of property—a field.
b. Consider defined: To purpose; to devise; to plan.
c. This woman had a business plan in mind: To buy a field.
d. This was a deliberate plan; a well thought out plan.
e. Purchasing this field was not done impulsively or without much thought, prayer, and planning.
f. Though not stated, it is likely (conjecture here) that it was very close to her home—probably adjacent.
g. I Kings 21:2 – Ahab also had his eye on a field which was next to his property: “And Ahab spake unto Naboth, saying, Give me thy vineyard, that I may have it for a garden of herbs, because it is near unto my house.”
h. It was advantageous to purchase fields adjacent to one’s own property. Who would want a garden 20 miles away? That’s a long walk every morning to do the weeding or watering.
i. The virtuous woman had been eyeing the field which was probably right next door.
j. She “considered” it – meaning she devised a plan to obtain it.
k. Perhaps her neighbor just put it on the market—and the opportunity became available.
l. It seemed perfect to her.
• It would be able to produce much fruit.
• It was likely nearby and perhaps eliminated long trips to purchase wine and grape juice.
• It would be cheaper than in the marketplace.
• The children could be kept busy tending the vineyard.
• Though it involved a lot of work initially, she considered the long term benefit: it would save her husband money in the long run. It seemed like a great opportunity.
• So she made plans to obtain it.
3. She bought it.
a. After careful consideration, and after doing her homework, she decided to purchase it.
b. This was an investment.
c. It may not produce anything for a few years.
d. Up front, it would require investing a lot of time too—to till the ground and get the soil ready for planting.
e. Purchasing vines would also be an upfront expense.
f. She was willing to sacrifice the immediate for a long term gain.
g. This was not only a virtuous woman; this was a wise woman who planned ahead… like the ants.
1. Here we are told that she purchased this field with the “fruit of her hands.”
a. In other words, she bought the field with the money SHE made from her other “jobs.”
b. In vs. 18 we will see that she worked into the night to manufacture “merchandise” for selling. She made money from selling her merchandise.
c. In vs. 24 we are told that she sold fine linen and girdles or sashes that she made.
d. This was an extremely industrious woman. Who knows what other products she made and sold!
e. She took her profits (the fruit of her hands) and purchased the field. She had a bit of an entrepreneurial spirit in her.
f. In vs. 31 we are told that her husband, the head of the household, “gave her” of the fruit of her own hands. What she earned, she could keep and use however she wanted.
g. Vs. 11 – “The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her.”
h. She wasn’t spending money behind his back or without his knowledge.
i. She and her husband worked together as a unit – as a team in using the household monies.
j. She proved herself to be skillful and wise and her husband trusted her. He trusted her in financial decisions and let her use her own hard earned money according to her proven wisdom.
k. Vs. 14 – Her husband knew from experience that she was a wise shopper and never used her money foolishly.
l. She had her eye on this field, and used the money she made selling her merchandise to buy the field.
m. And again, her motive was always to improve the lot in life for her family. This was not done out of greed or covetousness.
n. She loved her family and wanted them to have the freshest grape juice and the sweetest wine to sweeten their water.
1. The text says that she bought the field, and that she planted the vineyard.
2. It also says that she girded her loins with strength and that she strengthened her arms.
a. Girding up one’s loins means to tie up the long, flowing garment with a sash above the knees so that your legs are freed up for movement – like running or work.
b. Strengthening one’s arms speaks of doing whatever it takes to free up one’s arms to be ready for work.
c. This speaks of getting ready and prepared for manual labor in the field… planting a vineyard.
3. What we are told here is that this virtuous woman was STRONG.
a. Actually, that is what the word translated “virtuous” means.
b. This was a strong woman—morally, spiritually, and even physically.
c. Planting a vineyard is hard work.
d. But she was ready for the hard work. She wasn’t afraid of hard work. And she wasn’t afraid to get her fingernails dirty.
e. This was a very strong and capable lady.
4. What made this especially remarkable was the fact that she was a wealthy woman who had servants.
a. She didn’t have to plant the vineyard. She could have had her servants do all the hard labor.
b. But she set the example for her servants. She wasn’t afraid to work with them.
c. She didn’t have to gird her loin and her arms with strength. That was what household servants were for.
d. But this strong lady wasn’t your average woman of means.
e. She didn’t put herself above others. She didn’t see working with her hands as being “beneath” her.
f. She rolled up her sleeves, girded up her loins, and went to work in the field which she bought with the money that she earned, and she planted a vineyard.
g. This woman took the “fruit of her hands” (the money she made from selling the merchandise she made) and she invested in a field in which she planted a vineyard so that there would be continuous fruit from her hands… for generations to come.
h. Unlike the unwise and unfaithful servant, she didn’t take her “talent” and bury in the ground. She used it in a profitable manner.
i. This was a very wise woman.
Proverbs 31:18-19
Her Candle Goeth Not Out by Night
Review: So far we have learned several things about the virtuous woman:
→ Vs. 10 – She is valuable—like rubies.
→ Vs. 11 – She is trustworthy.
→ Vs. 12 – She did good deeds for her husband her whole life.
→ Vs. 13 – She was a willing worker and made clothing for her family.
→ Vs. 14 – She was a diligent and wise shopper.
→ Vs. 15 – She rises early to minister to her family and servants and organizes the day’s chores.
→ Vs. 16-17 – With the fruit of her hands she invests in and plants a vineyard to provide fruit and wine for her family.
→ Vs. 18-19 – Tonight we are going to consider her merchandise and her work ethic.
She Makes Quality Merchandise to Sell (vs.18a)
1. Merchandise: A product which is sold for profit; products sold in the marketplace; trade; the act of doing business by exchange of goods and products.
a. The virtuous woman was engaged in merchandising.
b. She made products and either sold them for money or exchanged them for other products in a trade.
c. She may have sold goods from her home – as a cottage industry.
d. She may have brought her goods to the marketplace for sale.
e. This was more than a yard sale; she made these goods.
f. This was clearly a “business” that she operated for profit.
2. Good: This term (like our English word good) has a broad range of meaning.
a. Defined: Good; well-pleasing; fruitful; proper; convenient.
b. It speaks of that which is appealing to the senses.
c. It speaks of that which is useful and profitable.
d. It speaks of that which is good in quality.
e. It is the term repeated in Genesis where God said that everything He had made was “good.”
3. Perceive: Taste buds; to experience by taste; to discover by experience; to judge or discern.
a. The virtuous woman perceived from experience that her merchandise she sold for profit was good.
• She created a quality product and she knew it.
• She understood that what she made was valuable and useful, and that it was something that others would desire.
b. She perceived that her products were profitable.
• She had a good business “sense” (perception – discernment).
• She could almost taste the fact that her merchandise would be profitable and thus beneficial to her family.
• She had that sense about her—wisdom—discernment.
c. Going into business and selling merchandise was not done impulsively.
• She wasn’t taking a big risk; she wasn’t gambling with her family finances.
• It was not a crazy get-rich-quick scheme.
• Nor was she trying to sell “pet rocks” or create a new fad product.
• Her products were good, useful, and beneficial, and she knew that they were good and would sell.
4. Her merchandise was GOOD.
a. This fact speaks not only about the quality of her product, but also of the quality (or virtue) of the woman.
b. She made quality products because she did her best.
c. Ecc. 9:10a – “Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might…”
• Whatever a person is able to do, he or she should do so with all they’ve got.
• We should put our all into our work and do our best at whatever we do.
• The virtuous woman did her best in manufacturing her merchandise and she knew it was a good product.
• She knew it was good because she knew the skill, the labor, the effort, and the tender loving care required in making such a quality product.
d. The merchandise she made was her best.
• She made quality merchandise:
» Vs. 24 – Fine linen—this was a quality material
» Vs. 16 – She considered the field before she bought it; she wanted to be sure it would produce quality fruit.
» Vs. 21 – Her household is dressed in scarlet – which was a valuable, quality dyed cloth.
» Vs. 22 – She made tapestry and her clothing was silk. Those are fine products that she made.
• She didn’t just slap things together, cut corners, and make a “so so” product for a quick sale and a quick buck.
» Shoddy workmanship might sell for a while—before people realize how cheaply made it was.
» But this woman made a quality product—and her customers would be repeat customers.
• This is true in what we do in our daily jobs; it is also true in our service for the Lord.
» God wants our products to be gold, silver, and precious stones—not wood, hay, and stubble.
» Eventually all of our service for Him will be evaluated by fire and its quality will be manifested.
• We should do our best at whatever we do.
• This virtuous woman did her best, which is why she is praised in this passage.
She works well into the night (vs. 18b)
A. This speaks of the diligence of her work ethic.
1. Vs. 15 – We were told earlier that she gets up while it is still night time (dark).
a. She gets up early before the sun so that she can get a head start on the day’s activities.
b. She prepares food for her household.
c. She also gives a “portion” (the day’s work schedule) to her servants.
d. She is up early with a plan for her servants to use their time wisely and productively throughout the day too.
2. Vs. 18 – Now we are told that she stays up into the night working as well.
a. I take this to be hyperbole to drive home a point. (Remember that this is poetry—a proverb.)
• I don’t think that her candle is burning literally ALL night long—implying that she works all night long.
• This would be unreasonable seeing that she gets up while it is still dark.
• She is a hard worker but is not foolish. She realizes that she needs to sleep.
b. “Her candle going not out at night” is a figure of speech designed to drive home one point:
• She works hard and long.
• She takes advantage of a few more hours of energy she has left after the sun goes down to get a few more projects completed.
c. After dinner and the family has been fed, when the sun begins to go down, and perhaps after the kids have been put to bed, she lights up a candle and continues working on her merchandise.
3. Eph. 5:16 – “Redeeming the time.”
a. Paul applies a general principle to the need for believers to be on their guard spiritually—and to be aware of the spirit of the age around us—the “season” of time.
b. But the general principle that he uses can certainly be applied in many other situations.
c. The virtuous woman also redeemed her time. She made good use of her time.
d. If she felt that she had a little energy left at the end of the day she would take advantage of that and use her time in a profitable way.
e. This speaks of her virtue—her work ethic.
f. She was a good steward of her time.
g. As Solomon wrote, “The sleep of a laboring man (or woman!) is sweet.” (Ecc. 5:12)
4. Prov. 20:13 – “Love not sleep, lest thou come to poverty; open thine eyes, and thou shalt be satisfied with bread.”
a. This lady was not lazy; she did not love to sleep.
b. Therefore she did not come to poverty.
c. She opened her eyes, kept the candles burning, and made merchandise that she sold and added to the family finances.
d. Thus, she was satisfied with bread—and so was her family.
B. This Also May Speak of Her Wise Preparation.
1. The concept of a candle not going out is a relatively common figure of speech.
a. The word for “candle” means a light of some kind; it can mean either an individual candle or a lamp that burned by oil.
b. It is often translated “lamp”
• Ps. 119:105 – “Thy Word is a lamp unto my feet.”
• I Sam. 3:3 – “Ere the lamp of God went out in the Temple.”
c. A lamp not going out (while a literal event) was also used as a figure of speech to describe the wisdom required in keeping oil in the lamp. It speaks of planning ahead.
d. There is a parable in Matthew 25 about virgins and their lamps.
• The folly of the foolish virgins was seen in the fact that they let their lamps go out. They didn’t plan ahead.
• The wise virgins kept plenty of oil for their lamp and were able to go with the bridegroom. They planned ahead and were prepared.
e. It is possible that the statement about the virtuous woman that “her candle goeth not out by night” (which is clearly figurative language in one of the Bible’s poetic books) was intended to:
• Speak of the literal fact that she worked at night.
• She was a wise planner and organizer and was willing to stay up at night to finish an order she had for her merchandise.
» She didn’t run out of oil and thus found herself unable to work at night… and keep up with the orders for her merchandise.
» She kept the lamps trimmed, full of oil, and burning so that she could take advantage of the time and be more productive.
She Works With Her Hands (vs. 19)
1. This woman works with her own hands.
a. She was unlike the model, aristocratic women from the Elizabethan era who considered themselves above working with their hands.
b. This woman DID work with her hands and did an excellent job.
c. And again, what made this remarkable was the fact that she was a woman of means.
• She could easily have ordered her servants to do the manual labor.
• She could have functioned as the manager or CEO and ordered others to do the work.
• But she worked with her own hands.
2. We see her working with her own hands in several passages:
a. Vs. 13 – She works willingly with her hands, seeking wool and making cloth.
b. Vs. 19 – She lays her hands to the spindle (spinning wheel) to spin yarn.
c. Vs. 22 – She makes coverings of tapestry.
d. Vs. 24 – She makes fine linen and sashes.
3. Jay Adams, the man who made Christian counseling popular several decades ago made an observation about housewives.
a. As he counselled housewives who were experiencing depression, and as he probed with questions, he discovered that sometimes the root of the depression could be traced to a lack of order and structure in their lives.
b. He discovered that many of them were not diligent with their hands around the house and were not redeeming the time.
c. As a result they felt down, discouraged, useless, and even depressed.
d. And rather than prescribing valium to deal with the depressed, he prescribed “getting busy” and accomplishing things throughout the day. (Painting a room; cleaning out the fridge; deep cleaning the house; yard work; etc.)
e. Then they began feeling better about themselves—because they got things done that they had postponed for months and they felt a sense of accomplishment—and a sense of being useful and productive.
f. That was a lesson from the virtuous woman. She didn’t have time to waste on feeling sorry for herself. She was too busy getting things done for her family.
g. She slept well at night and rejoiced in all the Lord enabled her to do. It is better to GIVE than to receive. And it feels better to give than to receive too.
Proverbs 31:20
The Virtuous Woman Ministers to the Poor and Needy
Review: So far we have learned several things about the virtuous woman:
→ Vs. 10 – She is valuable—like rubies.
→ Vs. 11 – She is trustworthy.
→ Vs. 12 – She did good deeds for her husband her whole life.
→ Vs. 13 – She was a willing worker and made clothing for her family.
→ Vs. 14 – She was a diligent and wise shopper.
→ Vs. 15 – She rises early to minister to her family and servants and organizes the day’s chores.
→ Vs. 16-17 – With the fruit of her hands she invests in and plants a vineyard to provide fruit and wine for her family.
→ Vs. 18-19 – She makes and sells good merchandise to help with family finances
→ Vs. 20 – She generously gives to the poor and needy
1. The virtuous woman is a strong and noble woman.
a. The word “virtuous” means strong.
b. She is strong physically; she is strong in her work ethic; she is strong in love for her family; she is strong in her entrepreneurial spirit; she is strong in virtue.
c. Here we see her strength in loving, selfless, generous giving.
2. The implication in this proverb is that the virtuous woman set aside some of the money and/or goods that she earned and/or made, in order to give to the poor and needy.
a. Vs. 13 – She makes woolen yarn for knitting and linen cloth from flax.
b. Vs. 16 – She planted a vineyard—and has fruit.
c. Vs. 18-19 – She makes “merchandise” from her spindle and distaff. (cloth)
d. So far, Lemuel has described a hard working woman who makes many things.
• She is wealthy and has property and many material goods. Someone might assume her to be materialistic selfish, and greedy.
• This passage demonstrates just the opposite.
• She is loving and generous with her material wealth.
e. She makes various kinds of “merchandise” with her spindle. Then, from the fruits of her labors, she stretches out her hand to give to the poor and needy.
f. Eph. 4:28 – Her generosity is consistent with what Paul encourages for the believer today.
• “Let him that stole steal no more: but rather let him labour, working with his hands the thing which is good, that he may have to give to him that needeth.”
• The righteous one works hard so that he may have enough to give to the needy.
3. She gave cloth or clothing to the needy—like Dorcas.
a. Acts 9:36 – “Now there was at Joppa a certain disciple named Tabitha, which by interpretation is called Dorcas: this woman was full of good works and almsdeeds which she did.”
b. Acts 9:39 – “And all the widows stood by him weeping, and shewing the coats and garments which Dorcas made, while she was with them.”
c. At her funeral it became apparent how deeply she was loved and why. She gave and served others.
4. Perhaps she gave fruit from her vineyard to the needy and hungry.
5. This kind of generosity was already described in Proverbs.
a. Prov. 31:9 – Lemuel’s mother encouraged Lemuel to be generous to the poor and needy.
• Now Lemuel describes this kind of generosity to the poor as characteristic of his ideal or virtuous woman.
b. Prov. 11:25 – “The liberal (generous) soul shall be made fat: and he that watereth shall be watered also himself.”
• You reap what you sow.
• Those who show mercy to others will receive mercy from others.
c. Prov. 21:26b – “… The righteous giveth and spareth not.”
• Generous, selfless, sacrificial giving is characteristic of the righteous.
d. Prov. 22:9 – “He that hath a bountiful eye shall be blessed; for he giveth of his bread to the poor.”
• The virtuous woman gave what she had to meet the needs of those less fortunate.
• It was encouraging to see the response of folks at Salem Bible Church to the needs of the orphanage recently mentioned in Haiti.
6. What a CONTRAST to the greedy and selfish already described in the book of Proverbs.
a. Prov. 30:14 – “There is a generation, whose teeth are as swords, and their jaw teeth as knives, to devour the poor from off the earth, and the needy from among men.”
b. Prov. 21:26 – “He coveteth greedily all the day long: but the righteous giveth and spareth not.”
• Vs. 25 – Who is it that covets greedily all day long? It is the slothful man. And his sloth is “killing” him. He refuses to labor.
• What a contrast to the virtuous woman. She gets up early to start her chores (working with her servants) and stays up late. “Her candle goeth not out by night.” (vs.18b)
• A clear contrast: The slothful man is selfish and greedy; the diligent, hard working woman is selfless and generous.
1. This is the second part of the proverb. It is a synonymous parallelism. The second part says basically the same thing as the first part.
2. “Stretching out” her hand is comparable to “reaching forth” her hands.
a. “Stretching out” defined: To scatter; to spread out to multiple points by casting.
• This term speaks of the fact that her giving was widespread.
• She didn’t just drop a dime here and there. She scattered her merchandise to a wide swath of people.
• Since this was characteristic of her whole life, she must have been a beloved woman in her community—like Dorcas.
b. “Reaching forth” defined: Send out; dispatch; let go; release; set free.
• This speaks of the fact that her hands were wide open to the poor and needy.
• She did not hold on to her wealth and her merchandise with a tight grip. She held everything loosely.
• She “let go” of her good. This speaks of giving willingly, freely, and generously… just as Christian giving is described in the New Testament.
c. Though they have a slightly different shade of meaning, these two concepts are virtuously synonymous.
3. The “poor” and the “needy” are also seen as being virtuously synonymous.
a. “Poor” defined: Afflicted; oppressed; lowly; a low status in society; usually persons in poverty; lacking resources of their own.
b. “Needy” defined: Persons in want; lacking essentials; persons who must live sparingly.
c. Again, the two terms are nearly identical – speaking of the same group in the community.
4. The virtuous woman was ACTIVE in her generosity.
a. The fact that she stretched out her hands indicates that she actively LOOKED for opportunities to help.
b. This woman is not focused on self; nor is she focused narrowly on her own family exclusively.
c. She looks beyond her own household for opportunities to minister to others.
d. She looks beyond “me, myself, and mine” to others.
e. This kind of generosity was incorporated into the Law of Moses.
• Deut. 15:7-8 – “If there be among you a poor man of one of thy brethren within any of thy gates in thy land which the LORD thy God giveth thee, thou shalt not harden thine heart, nor shut thine hand from thy poor brother: 8But thou shalt open thine hand wide unto him, and shalt surely lend him sufficient for his need, in that which he wanteth.”
f. The virtuous woman was not passive in her giving. She knew she had an abundance; and she also knew that others did not.
g. Therefore she purposely looked for people with needs.
h. She observed when others were being oppressed.
i. If she saw children dressed in rags, she did something about it. She had cloth sitting around in her house that could be used to help meet that need.
j. If she saw a family that was hungry, she had a vineyard that she could use to help meet that need.
k. I John 3:17-18 – “But whoso hath this world’s good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him? 18My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth.”
• Love is a verb. Love doesn’t just FEEL sorry for others. It does something about it.
• The virtuous woman DID have this world’s goods. She was a woman of means.
• And she was also a woman of compassion with a tender heart.
• When she saw a neighbor in need, she did not “shut up her heart.” Instead, she opened her heart and she opened her hands.
• She didn’t love in word only; she loved in DEED.
• She was a woman who was strong in virtue.
l. We are all (men and women) challenged to follow this example: “But to do good and to communicate (share) forget not: for with such sacrifices God is well pleased.” (Heb. 13:16)
Proverbs 31:21
She Cares for her Family in All Seasons
Introduction:
1. The virtuous woman has been variously described throughout this section as a noble, strong, caring, loving, sacrificial, industrious, hard working woman.
2. She is seen as being devoted to her husband and her family.
3. This verse speaks of her sacrificial care and labors for her family.
1. This woman prepares ahead of time for the cold season.
a. She knows that cold weather is coming and she prepares for it.
b. She anticipates what the needs of the next season will be and does whatever is necessary to meet those needs for her family.
c. We have seen this same quality in her earlier in this section.
• Vs. 15 – She knows her household needs to eat in the morning, so she rises early to meet that need. She also gives the daily chores to her maiden/servants.
• Vs. 18 – She anticipates orders for her merchandise, so she stays up late to meet those needs.
• Vs. 20 – She anticipates that the poor will need help, so she works industriously in order to have something to give to them.
• Vs. 21 – She anticipates the coming winter snows, so she plans for what her family will need in light of that.
• This woman looks ahead and plans ahead.
• That takes a lot of work and effort—because when you think ahead you realize how MUCH there is to do to be ready!
• She was not a procrastinator.
d. In this sense, she is like the ant:
• Prov. 30:24-25 – “There be four things which are little upon the earth, but they are exceeding wise: 25The ants are a people not strong, yet they prepare their meat in the summer.”
• Prov. 6:6-9 – “Go to the ant, thou sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise: 7Which having no guide, overseer, or ruler, 8Provideth her meat in the summer, and gathereth her food in the harvest. 9How long wilt thou sleep, O sluggard? when wilt thou arise out of thy sleep?”
• Like the ant, the virtuous woman planned ahead and did her work on time to be ready for the winter.
e. The woman who does not plan ahead lives in a perpetual panic mode—every day all year long.
• She doesn’t plan ahead so needs arise suddenly and unexpectedly to her and she panics wondering how she will ever meet that need.
• Waiting until the last minute, until the need is upon her doesn’t give her time to get ready, so she panics and does a poor job at meeting the need.
• She should know that when school starts, her kids will need clothes, but she puts it off and off until a few days before school—and then realizes she doesn’t have time… so she panics!
• She should anticipate that the garden will need weeding, but procrastinate until the garden is overrun with weeds—and it seems overwhelming… so she panics.
• She lives her life putting out one fire after another instead of planning head, getting busy, and doing what needs to be done ahead of time.
f. By way of contrast, the virtuous woman knows that winter is coming and she gets ready for it.
• Winter happens every year. The virtuous woman isn’t surprised by it. She plans for it.
• She not only plans, but she follows through on her plans.
• Plans are great and necessary, but useless unless they are carried out. She makes a plan and then gets busy doing the work.
2. She is not afraid of the snow.
a. Afraid: To fear, to be intimidated, frightened, in great distress
b. This woman did not fear the coming of the snow; she was not in great distress over it.
c. The thought is not the actual snowflakes as a cause of fear, but rather the cold, winter season and the many needs of that season.
d. She did not fear or go into panic mode when the snow fell.
e. She was not greatly distressed over it because she was ready for winter because she got ready in the fall.
f. When the snow fell, instead of panicking over it, she could enjoy its beauty in peace and even thank God for it.
g. That’s a much better state of mind than to fear, to panic, and to be stressed out over it.
3. And note that her concern was for her household.
a. Her plans, preparation, and labors were not for herself, but primarily for her family.
b. She didn’t have to be fearful for them.
c. When the snow fell, she had warm clothing already made!
d. When the snow fell, that’s no time to start making the clothes. That’s when they need to be ready to put on.
e. And instead of panicking when the snow fell and being fearful for her family, she would rejoice in being able to dig out the warm coats and sweaters that she made for them.
f. When she thought of the snow, she thought of her family and what they would need to be warm and comfortable.
g. Jesus said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.”
h. This woman would be blessed (happy; rejoicing) to have something to give to her family when the snow fell.
i. They would appreciate the warm clothing—and would appreciate all the forethought and labor that went into it too.
j. The children would appreciate their mother; the husband would appreciate his wife.
k. Vs. 19 – All the hours she spent burning the midnight oil and working on sweaters and coats would seem worth it all now!
l. A well-disciplined, industrious, sacrificial life made her happy!
m. What a contrast to the procrastinator who sits around wasting time and then panics when things aren’t done on time! That woman isn’t happy.
n. She lives a life of lazy boredom followed by periods of fear and panic. She is miserable.
o. She thinks that getting up early and being busy all day long will make her miserable; but just the opposite is true.
1. She is not afraid of the snowy cold season because she is ready.
2. Vs. 13 – “She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.”
a. Because she sought out wool for clothing material, and because she works willingly with her hands, her household will be warm this winter.
b. With the wool she could make warm sweaters and heavy duty outer garments.
3. And notice that not only are they clothed warmly for the winter, they are clothed fashionably for the winter too—in scarlet!
4. Matthew Henry described the scarlet as “strong cloth and fit for winter, and yet rich and making a good appearance.”
5. Scarlet cloth was expensive cloth.
a. Putting rich color in clothing was an added expense.
b. II Sam. 1:24 – Saul as king clothed the daughters of Israel in scarlet and other delights.
• “Ye daughters of Israel, weep over Saul, who clothed you in scarlet, with other delights, who put on ornaments of gold upon your apparel.”
• Matt. 27:28 – Mockingly, Jesus was clothed in a scarlet robe for His trial.
• Scarlet cloth was also used for kings’ robes, priests’ robes, and in the curtains and veil in the tabernacle.
c. You wouldn’t bother putting expensive scarlet dye on cheap, flimsy material. It was used on fine, heavy, quality cloth… which tended to be the warmest.
d. Hence, the clothing she made for her household was the best.
Proverbs 31:22
She Brings Beauty into the Home
Review: So far we have learned several things about the virtuous woman:
→ Vs. 10 – She is valuable—like rubies.
→ Vs. 11 – She is trustworthy.
→ Vs. 12 – She did good deeds for her husband her whole life.
→ Vs. 13 – She was a willing worker and made clothing for her family.
→ Vs. 14 – She was a diligent and wise shopper.
→ Vs. 15 – She rises early to minister to her family and servants and organizes the day’s chores.
→ Vs. 16-17 – With the fruit of her hands she invests in and plants a vineyard to provide fruit and wine for her family.
→ Vs. 18-19 – She makes and sells good merchandise to help with family finances
→ Vs. 20 – She generously gives to the poor and needy
→ Vs. 21 – She prepares for her family’s needs ahead of time.
→ Tonight we want to see that she brings beauty into the home.
22a She maketh herself coverings of tapestry;
A. The Virtuous Woman Makes Tapestry for Her Home
1. Covering of tapestry:
a. This is one word in the Hebrew.
b. It is a noun meaning a bed spread, cushion, or blanket.
c. The term itself has been translated as a decorative blanket similar to an afghan.
d. It could refer to a decorative tapestry to be used as a wall hanging or clothing.
e. It could refer to a large piece of decorative cloth for any purpose. Such tapestries were used in the Temple for curtains of blue, purple, and scarlet. It added beauty to the Temple.
2. Usage:
a. The term is used only twice in the Bible.
b. It is used here and in Prov. 7:16.
c. As an interesting side note, the term is used only twice in the Bible: once concerning the virtuous woman (ch. 31) and once concerning the opposite kind of woman, the harlot (ch. 7).
3. Prov. 7:16 – The only other usage of the Hebrew term:
a. In this context, it is used of a beautiful bed spread.
b. The harlot covers her bed with this beautiful tapestry.
c. She perfumes her bed with sweet smelling spices.
d. Her purpose is to make her bed alluring, enticing, attractive, and appealing.
4. In Proverbs 31, the virtuous woman makes “coverings of tapestry” (same Hebrew word as in ch. 7).
a. And her purpose is really the same as that of the harlot.
b. She makes something beautiful, attractive, and appealing for her home.
c. The point is that she brings beauty into her home.
d. So far, we have seen the practical, functional, and utilitarian side of her labors: for food, clothing, organizational skills, and an ability to make money.
e. Here we see another side of her labors: her creative, imaginative, artistic side. She brings beauty into her home.
5. In Bible times, Kings lived in luxurious palaces. However, many people lived in tents. Others lived in homes made of stucco-like material with a sod roof and dirt floors.
a. The average home was not all that attractive.
b. But the virtuous woman brought the woman’s touch into her home.
c. She worked and labored in order to turn an ordinary cloth spread into a piece of art—a beautiful covering.
d. Some women are very talented at taking something drab and ordinary, and turning it into something very beautiful.
e. I guess today you might liken this to a woman who purchases things at yard sales and to junk stores, and with a large dose of imagination and creativity turns them into decorative pieces that add to the beauty of her home—works of art.
6. And again, it should be noted, that this woman was not motivated by greed. She wasn’t trying to keep up with the Joneses. She wasn’t trying to show off—or to have the best house on the block.
a. She did this for her husband and her family.
b. She wanted them to be proud of their home.
c. She wanted them to feel comfortable at home.
d. She wanted them to experience a pleasant atmosphere at home.
e. She wanted them to have a home where they would not be ashamed to have company come.
f. She wanted the inside of her home to be attractive, neat, orderly, well kept, well planned, well designed, full of beauty and pleasant things.
g. And she did so for her husband and family. It was a ministry to them.
h. And of course, it would be a testimony to visitors. It would be obvious to visitors that the lady of the house excelled in turning her house into a home… attractive, pleasing, and beautiful.
B. The Virtuous Woman was Wise
1. Prov. 8:21 – Here we see wisdom personified as a woman.
a. Those who love Lady Wisdom (by listening to her and obeying her) will discover that the wisdom she gives will result in having their home filled with “treasures.”
b. Of course, the greatest treasures would be spiritual in nature: love, joy and peace.
c. But these treasures could also include physical treasures—which are gained as a result of taking heed to Lady Wisdom’s words: hard work, diligence, planning ahead, seeking to please others.
d. Such treasures are the FRUIT of wisdom. The virtuous woman was wise. She listened to Lady Wisdom.
2. Prov. 14:1 – “Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.”
a. The foolish woman plucks down and destroys her own house. What a shame.
• The plucking down on her house is because she is a fool.
• The woman’s foolish character has a detrimental effect on her household.
• In Proverbs folly is often seen as lazy, selfish, stubborn, and unwilling to listen to Lady Wisdom.
• And the fool in Proverbs suffers the consequences of his own folly. That is the case with the foolish woman here.
b. On the other hand, the wise woman builds up her house.
• The virtuous woman was a woman of character. She was no fool, but wise.
• She listens to Lady Wisdom.
• She is hard working, diligent, others oriented, plans ahead, and giving. That is wisdom in action.
• Thus, her household is well cared for—built up.
• Wisdom builds her house. Wisdom turns her house into a beautiful home.
3. Prov. 15:6 – “In the house of the righteous is much treasure.”
a. Here it is a righteous person who has “treasures” in his or her home.
b. That is because this person does things the RIGHT way… not the wrong way like the fool.
c. Thus, the righteous person gets to experience the fruits of his righteousness: beautiful, valuable treasures.
d. Again, this passage is not promoting greed or materialism. It is promoting righteousness by highlighting the practical fruit of righteousness.
4. Prov. 24:3-4 – “Through wisdom is an house builded; and by understanding it is established: 4And by knowledge shall the chambers be filled with all precious and pleasant riches.”
a. And again, Solomon speaks of the right way to build a house.
b. By building a house he does not mean the actual construction.
c. He is primarily speaking about the “household” – the family and their dwelling place… the home.
d. Through wisdom, understanding, and knowledge, the chambers (rooms) of that home will be filled with precious and pleasant riches (items of great value).
e. The virtuous woman was a woman of wisdom, understanding (discernment) and knowledge.
f. She used her wisdom, discernment, and knowledge for the good of her family.
g. Thus, her family was able to experience the fruit of it all—precious and pleasant things in the home—like beautiful tapestry… pieces of art… creative and handsome things.
h. Her family enjoyed coming home to such a place.
i. And the virtuous woman’s husband and children appreciated all the time and thought that she put into making her home beautiful.
1. We saw in the previous verse (vs. 21) that the virtuous woman clothed her family well.
a. They have warm clothing for the winter. They are ready for the snow to fall!
b. They also have well made, fashionable clothing. It was made with scarlet dye. This was used on the well made expensive cloth.
c. Her family was clothed well. We will see that again in the following verse.
2. But in verse 22, Lemuel describes how the virtuous woman clothes herself.
a. HER clothing is silk and purple.
• She made fine clothing for her family. She wanted her family to be warm, fashionable, and well dressed.
• She also made fine clothing for herself.
• She also wanted herself to be warm, fashionable, and well dressed.
b. Silk was a very fine and expensive cloth.
• The word translated “silk” is defined as linen.
• Linen is woven from the fibers of flax plants. The fibers made it very durable.
• It is one of the oldest and most expensive textiles in the world.
• In vs. 13 we are told that the virtuous woman gathered flax plants and worked it into fine linen with her own hands.
• She made very fine clothing for herself.
• This was not contradictory to what Peter wrote in I Peter 3:3-4: “Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.”
• Peter was not forbidding a godly woman from doing up her hair, wearing gold, or wearing fine clothing. (If this is interpreted as forbidding the items on his list then he is forbidding them from wearing clothing—apparel!)
• Peter is simply stating that the outward adorning is not really what makes a godly woman beautiful. It is her inward adorning that makes her truly a beautiful person.
3. Her silk clothing (linen) was purple.
a. Purple dye was made from a shellfish and was expensive.
b. It was very desirable and fashionable.
c. It was worn by royalty and the well to do.
d. In a time when homes and clothing were often very drab, a woman dressed in purple linen would stand out in a crowd—not in an ostentatious way… but as a woman who was well dressed.
e. This was obviously a woman of means—perhaps in part because she came from a wealthy family.
f. But the context of the proverb indicates that it was because she was a wise and diligent worker.
g. The point of our proverb is that this woman brought beauty into her home for her family.
h. She also made herself beautiful for her husband.
i. She takes care of herself. She is no slob. She does not consider it to be a badge of “spirituality” to dress in poor, drab, shabby, or old fashioned clothing.
j. The virtuous woman took the time to make herself attractive. That is a very womanly thing to do.
k. This proverb does not speak of this as vanity or worldliness, but rather as VIRTUE.
l. And of course, it has to do with motive.
• The virtuous woman was not selfish, coveting the best for herself. She gave generously to the poor. (vs. 20)
• She was not greedy, worldly, selfish, and proud. That was not why she wanted beautiful things.
• Rather, she was righteous, understanding, and sought to bring the woman’s touch into her home for her family to enjoy and she kept herself looking attractive for her husband.
• This is seen in our proverb not as a vice but a virtue.
4. The virtuous woman is a woman. She is a woman of beauty.
a. She makes her home beautiful for her family.
b. She makes herself beautiful for her husband.
c. Vs. 28 – No wonder her whole family praises her!
Proverbs 31:23
Her Husband is Known in the Gates
Introduction:
1. In verse 23 we have yet another unique description of the strong and noble woman – the virtuous woman. This passage indicates that she is partially responsible for her husband’s high position in the community.
2. This is not stated explicitly, but is stated implicitly.
3. If we ripped vs. 23 out of its context, we might be hard pressed to make that conclusion.
a. Looking at vs. 23 all by itself one might conclude that the verse is praising the husband and his standing in the community.
b. But IN its context, the author’s point is pretty clear.
c. The whole section is about the virtuous woman and all that she has achieved for herself, for the poor, and especially, for her family.
d. In context, the fact that her husband is known in the gates is to be reckoned or credited (at least in part) to his virtuous wife.
e. It is because of her that he stands out.
The Virtuous Woman’s Husband Has a High Position
A. His Prominent Position
1. In Bible times the “gate” of the city was the place where public business and legal transactions took place.
a. Prov. 1:20 – It was the place for public speaking. It is where Lady Wisdom spoke publically to the young men: “She crieth in the chief place of concourse, in the openings of the gates.”
b. Gen. 23:10, 16 – It was the place where public business was transacted.
c. Deut. 16:18; 21:19 – It was the place where courts of justice were held.
d. Deut. 17:5; Jer. 20:2 – It was a place for public punishment. (stoning; stocks)
e. The gate of a city was a place for prominent leaders to gather—public speakers; lawyers; judges; prominent business men; the elders of the city; etc.
2. The fact that the husband of the virtuous woman was “known” in the gates indicates that he had a prominent position in that city.
a. He was well known by the prominent leaders—elders, judges, lawyers, business leaders, etc.
b. He was known by the elders and the leaders there because he was one of them.
3. The husband of the virtuous woman “sitteth among the elders of the land”.
a. He did not sit next to the elders or behind them.
b. He sat AMONG them… because he was one of them.
4. This man had arisen to a high position as one of the elders in the land.
a. It is not necessary to know exactly what position he held (other than elder) or what his specific responsibilities were.
b. The point is that he had arisen to prominence and was well known by the leaders.
c. He is well known, respected, and admired in the community.
d. This is really all that vs. 23 states explicitly. This man is a well-known and respected leader in the city.
e. But the context of the proverb states much more implicitly.
The WIFE of the Well-Known and Respected Leader
1. Vs. 11 – The heart of this husband can safely trust in his wife.
a. Other husbands in the community may worry about their wives—what they are up to.
• Is my wife being faithful?
• Is she getting the chores done at home or is the house a mess?
• Is she slandering me behind my back?
• Is she spending money lavishly – beyond our means?
• Is she taking care of the kids?
• All these worries on the hearts of other men drive them to distraction.
• Worry prevents them from concentrating on their work… and they therefore do not excel at what they do.
• Worries at home prevent them from rising up to a high position.
b. Other husbands may have to worry about their wives; but not this man. His heart safely trusts in her.
c. She has created a safe environment and a worry free zone from which her husband can flourish at work.
2. Vs. 11b – The husband of the virtuous woman has “no need of spoil.”
a. Because of his virtuous wife, he has everything he needs.
b. He’s not the guy at the office who is always borrowing money, asking for help, in need of a ride.
c. People might run in the other direction when this guy comes down the hall—he’s always asking for something.
d. But that is not the case of the husband of the virtuous woman.
e. Because of his wife’s industry and diligence, this husband has no need of goods. She takes good care of him.
3. Vs. 12 – The virtuous, noble woman does GOOD to her husband every day… consistently… throughout his whole life.
a. They say behind every successful man there is a strong, noble, virtuous woman.
b. This is the essence of verse 12. The success of the husband in verse 23 is to be traced back to vs. 12 – to his virtuous wife.
c. She stands behind him doing good things for him every single day. She supports him.
d. There are soldiers fighting on the front lines. But behind them is an army of other soldiers in a supportive role—bringing supplies, ammunition, food, watching the skies, keeping good communication, etc. Without this supportive role, the soldiers on the front line would never make it.
e. The husband in vs. 23 rose to a prominent position BECAUSE his wife (in her supportive role) has been doing him good behind the scenes every day… quietly and selflessly.
4. Vs. 14 – This husband became prosperous and rose to a prominent position (in part) because his wife was a shrewd shopper; she was not a spend-a-holic. She was wise and cautious with the family money.
a. She brought her food from afar. She traveled to get the best products and the best deals for her husband and family.
b. The virtuous woman took her responsibilities as homemaker seriously.
c. Prov. 31:27 – “She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.”
d. When guests came to their house they were impressed with her setting… with the wonderful variety of foods and furnishings.
e. This put the husband in a good light. Her wisdom was a good reflection on him.
5. Vs. 15 – The husband in vs. 23 is well known and respected (in part) because his wife does such a good job in taking care of business at home.
a. She gets up early—before sunrise—to prepare food for her family for the day.
b. They get a good breakfast. Their day starts off well.
c. She gives a portion (actually it means law or orders) for her servants so that everything is taken care of on the home front—decently and in order.
d. Thus, her husband can go about his business without distraction… without worrying about the kids… about the house… about the home front.
6. Vs. 20 – This husband is well known and respected in the community (in part) because of the kindness and charity of his wife.
a. She works diligently, spends judiciously, saves carefully, and has money enough to give generously.
b. Over the years, her charity and kindness became well known.
c. This too was a good reflection on her husband.
d. Perhaps he was known in the gates as the “husband of the kind and charitable woman.” Everybody has heard of Dorcas. Does anyone know her husband’s name?
e. The good reputation and good character of the virtuous woman enhances his reputation and character.
7. Vs. 21 – Her household (including her husband) is well clothed.
a. They have warm clothing for the cold weather.
b. They are dressed in scarlet – an expensive and fashionable cloth.
c. Vs. 24 – She makes and sells fashionable girdles – sashes.
d. Her husband would be the beneficiary of all of these labors.
e. He would stand out in a crowd as a well-dressed man.
f. Clearly, this can be traced back to his virtuous wife.
g. Because of her labors, he stands out—he is well known and respected.
h. As an elder and leader in the community, it would be quite inappropriate and unseemly for him to walk about in sloppy, tattered garments. His wife took care of that.
i. People noticed. He stood out.
8. Vs. 22 – His virtuous wife also took care of herself.
a. She didn’t come to town unkempt and dressed like a slob; or dressed immodestly. She did not embarrass him; she took good care of her appearance.
b. She made herself coverings of tapestry—for her home and perhaps also tapestry embroidered on her clothing for beauty and design.
c. Her clothing was “silk and purple”—fine clothing and colorful and fashionable.
d. She too stood out… and enhanced her husband.
e. Prov. 12:4 – “A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed is as rottenness in his bones.”
f. She made him feel like a king… he was proud to have her by his side… honored to be seen with her.
g. He was certainly not ashamed of her.
h. She was an impressive lady and was a great asset to him; she enhanced her husband’s stature in the community.
CONCLUSION:
1. If you take verse 23 out of its context and read it apart from the context, it says nothing about the wife.
2. It simply states that this man is a prominent elder/leader in his city.
3. It seems to give all the credit to him.
4. But seen in its context, it takes on a different tone.
a. Yes he is a prominent leader in the community.
b. This is not to take away from his own personal achievements. But that is not the point of this chapter.
c. King Lemuel’s point is that a good measure of his success is to be traced back to his strong, noble, diligent, wise, creative, well organized, virtuous wife!
d. Her influence is seen far beyond the confines of the home. Her influence is seen in the “gates” – the center of community life: politics, business, justice, etc.
e. She is truly his “helpmeet”—and because of her help, her diligence, her wisdom, and her support, he became a well-known and well respected leader.
Proverbs 31:24
The Virtuous Woman Runs a Business
Introduction:
1. In verse 24 we have a passage that states plainly that the virtuous woman ran her own business.
2. This raises a thorny question among some Christian women, namely, should a mother work outside of the home?
3. While our present passage does not settle the issue with finality, it does shed some helpful light.
Her Business
A. She manufactured products
1. She made her own fine linen.
a. She was not just a middle man or a merchant.
b. She was the manufacturer.
2. Fine linen was very expensive material.
a. Garments made of fine linen were luxury items.
b. They would be purchased by the wealthy at a high price.
c. Flax was used in making light, fine clothing—especially prized in hot regions.
d. The rich man in Luke 16:19 wore fine linen: “There was a certain rich man, which was clothed in purple and fine linen, and fared sumptuously every day.”
3. In Prov. 31:13 we are told that she personally went about seeking flax and worked it with her hands—turning the flax into fine linen.
a. Fine linen was made of the fibers from the flax plant.
b. It is not clear whether “seeking” it means that she sought to find a good deal from the merchants OR if she grew it herself.
c. The word translated “sought” can mean “to care for” – as in tending a garden and caring for it.
d. Either way, she went out of her way to cut down on the cost of the raw materials for manufacturing her products—either by growing her own flax or seeking far and wide for the best deal on flax. (cf. vs.14)
e. However she obtained the flax, Prov. 31:13 indicates that she “worked” the flax fibers with her hands and turned them into fine thread for her cloth.
4. She made “girdles.”
a. Girdles in the Bible were large belts or sashes that were used to “gird up” long flowing tunic-like garments.
b. Well made sashes were highly valued.
• II Sam. 18:11 – “And Joab said unto the man that told him, And, behold, thou sawest him, and why didst thou not smite him there to the ground? and I would have given thee ten shekels of silver, and a girdle.”
c. Virtually everyone needed sashes—so the market would be almost limitless—if her products were good.
5. Prov. 31:18 – The merchandise she made was of a good quality.
a. And she worked well into the night to assure that her work was of a good quality.
b. She may have been a little picky and persnickety… but for good reason.
c. If she failed to make a good quality product, they would not sell and her labors would be in vain.
B. She sold products
1. We are also told that she sold her products.
2. She was not only the manufacturer, but she was also the salesman.
a. She had to make it known in the community that she had products for sale.
b. She would have found it necessary to promote her products.
c. The sales department was a whole different part of her business—and the text states that she was the one who sold the goods.
3. This would take up more of her time.
a. She would have promoted them by word of mouth.
b. She may also have promoted her products at the local marketplace—and perhaps in nearby cities.
C. She delivered products to the merchants
1. Here is yet another side to her business that she did herself.
2. She delivered the products to the merchants – either the merchants at the marketplace, or the traveling merchant caravans, or the ship merchants at the seashore.
a. Ezek. 27:16 – “Syria was thy merchant by reason of the multitude of the wares of thy making: they occupied in thy fairs with emeralds, purple, and broidered work, and fine linen, and coral, and agate.”
3. She ran the delivery department… to the local market and perhaps to the ships.
4. She ran the entire business: locating raw materials, manufacturing, sales, and shipping. She did it all!
5. With all these responsibilities, she was one busy woman.
D. Other Business Endeavors
1. We are also told a little about what she did with her spare time.
a. Prov. 31:16 – She also bought real estate, planted a vineyard for grapes, and by implication, made juices and wine for her family.
b. Prov. 31:21 – She made clothing for her family.
c. Prov. 31:22 – She made tapestries for herself and her home, as well as fine clothing for herself.
d. Prov. 31:23 – Her husband was evidently dressed well too with the clothing she made for him; he stood out at the gate of the city.
2. Matthew Henry had a helpful comment on this passage: “Those families are likely to thrive that sell more than they buy.”
a. The virtuous woman made many products. She provided well first and foremost for her family.
b. But she had time, energy, and materials left over to make additional products to sell.
c. She was not spending more than they took in. She worked hard so they took in more than they spent.
Lessons
1. The virtuous woman worked—and some of her work was outside of the home.
2. I realize that some Christian women have some strongly held views about the subject of women working outside the home.
3. Perhaps we could glean a few Biblical principles relating to the subject.
a. Titus 2:3-4 – This passage speaks about a young Christian woman has a husband and children. The text makes three statements:
• The godly wife is to love her husband (husband-lover)
• The godly wife is to love her children (child-lover).
• The godly wife is to take care of responsibilities at home. (a worker at home)
• The principle: her priority is her family.
b. Prov. 31 indicates that the virtuous woman did work.
• It appears that much of the work she did could have been done at home – as a cottage industry.
• However, some of her work took her outside of the home.
• The principle: The Bible does NOT forbid women with children from working.
c. These verses present Biblical principles—and these facts do not contradict one another. They complement one another.
d. We should all agree that the principles found in Titus 2 and Proverbs 31 are both Biblical and true.
4. This issue is really one of motivation and priorities.
a. The virtuous woman worked, but her motivation was not materialism or greed. It was not to keep up with the Joneses. It was not to embark on a career.
b. Her reason for working was to help meet the legitimate needs of her family.
c. And at the same time the virtuous woman fully understood that her real calling was not to the linen industry or the sash making business, but to her husband and children.
d. The virtuous woman was able to do both – run her business and run her household. This chapter does not condemn her for that—but praises her.
e. My advice to young mothers with children has always been to do everything you possibly can to stay at home with your kids while they are young and developing. That is the ideal.
f. But the ideal is not always possible for all families. Sometimes, even after cutting back to bare bones, there isn’t enough money to keep up with the bills.
g. Circumstances are different for every family and each family has to seek God’s will as to how to deal with their finances.
h. Money is a necessary part of life in this world. A family needs an income to survive.
i. But be sure to distinguish between needs and wants.
5. In the local church, we would do well to remember the virtuous woman.
a. Regardless of our personal convictions on the subject of women working outside the home, we should all agree that the Bible does not forbid it.
b. We should also all agree that a mother’s priority is to be her husband and children.
c. Women who work should not be condemned by those who are stay at home moms.
d. And stay at home moms should not be looked down upon by women who work outside the home.
e. Even when believers’ personal convictions differ, there should be unity and agreement concerning the Biblical principles.
Proverbs 31:25
She is Robed in Strength and Honor
A. Her Clothing
1. Previously we discovered that this noble woman made clothing for herself (vs. 22), for her family (vs. 21), and (by implication) for her husband (vs. 23). She even made the yarn and cloth for the clothing (vs.13, 19).
2. In our present passage we learn what her clothing is: strength and honor.
a. Obviously the clothing described is metaphorical.
b. But this figure of speech is designed to teach a literal truth.
c. Literally and physically, a person can be robed in dirty old rags or in beautiful, expensive, ornate clothing.
d. Metaphorically, this woman was robed in the BEST clothing: VIRTUES.
e. The particular virtues mentioned are strength and honor.
f. When a queen walks into a room, her royal clothing shouts out to all present that she is royalty – a queen.
g. When the virtuous woman walks into a room, her metaphorical clothing shouts out that she is a woman of strength and honor.
B. STRENGTH:
1. Defined: Power; might; boldness; ability; fortified; internal fortitude.
2. It is used of a strong city; fortified city; fortified tower.
3. Throughout this section, the virtuous woman is seen as a strong woman.
a. She is no shrinking violet.
b. Even the word translated “virtuous” means “strength; noble; vigor; ability.”
c. The word translated “virtuous” is translated as “strength” several times:
• Psalm 18:39 – “For thou hast girded me with strength unto the battle: thou hast subdued under me those that rose up against me.”
• Zech. 4:6 – “Then he answered and spake unto me, saying, This is the word of the LORD unto Zerubbabel, saying, Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the LORD of hosts.”
d. There are many evidences of strength found in this chapter:
• Vs. 13 – She seeks wool and flax and worketh willingly with her hands.
• Vs. 14 – She is like the merchants ships.
• Vs. 15 – She rises up early to feed her household.
• Vs. 16 – She considers a field; buys it; and plants a vineyard.
• Vs. 17 – She girds her loins with “strength” and “strengthens” her arm. This is clearly an expression of a strong, hard working woman. (different Hebrew word—but is a synonym)
• Vs. 18 – She works into the night.
• Vs. 19 – She works the spindle to made yarn herself.
• Vs. 21-22 – She makes her own clothing for her family.
• Vs. 24 – She runs her own business.
• This is one strong lady.
• There is nothing inconsistent with being feminine and being strong.
» She wasn’t strong from weight lifting.
» She wasn’t trying to be a man or look like a man.
» But she was physically strong and wasn’t afraid to get her hands dirty in working with her hands.
» She was strong and fortified on the inside—and it showed on the outside through her many labors.
C. Honor
1. Honor defined: Ornament; splendor; majesty; best quality; nobility; impressive character; dignity.
2. Usage:
a. Psalm 8:5 – “For thou hast made him a little lower than the angels, and hast crowned him with glory and honour.”
b. Isa. 53:2b – “He hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him.” It is used of Messiah and in this verse means something desirable.
c. The term is often used of God’s glory or of royalty – something that stands out as majestic and impressive.
3. This was the metaphorical clothing of the virtuous woman.
a. Her physical clothing was beautiful. (vs. 22)
b. But in vs. 25, Lemuel’s mother is speaking about another kind of beauty.
c. There was something noble and dignified about her; something desirable, comely; attractive; honorable.
d. She was adorned with these traits.
e. Whether she was physically beautiful or not, we don’t know. That is irrelevant anyway.
f. What matters is that she was a beautiful woman in her strength of character… she was desirable and comely because of her virtue.
g. She was robed in strength and honor.
h. This is what made her beautiful—regardless of what she actually looked like.
i. This is what made her strong—her strength is not just physical; it is primarily moral.
j. The true force of her strength was her dignity, virtue, and godly character. This is what made her a powerful woman.
1. REJOICE: To laugh; to rejoice; celebrate; to laugh at – mock; to smile at.
a. The virtuous woman laughs at the future – in the sense that she is not afraid of whatever it might bring. She is ready for it.
b. She isn’t sitting around biting her nails and fretting over the future. She laughs at it! She celebrates it!
2. The virtuous woman rejoices as she faces the future because she is prepared.
a. Vs. 21 – She is not afraid of the winter because she is prepared for it.
• She made warm clothing for them ahead of time.
• She looks ahead to the next season not in fear and trembling, but rather rejoicing. She is ready for it.
• This also seems to be another description of her strength.
• She laughs at the future out of boldness and confidence.
• Her confidence is not based on pride or a sense of superiority; rather her confidence is based upon the fact that she worked hard and is prepared for the future… not weak and fearful.
• Her hard work prepared her and armed her against any future potential sorrow and anxiety.
• She laughs at that which causes others (unprepared people) to worry.
b. Prov. 30:25 – “The ants are a people not strong, yet they prepare their meat in the summer.”
• The virtuous woman is prepared—like the ants—an illustration of wisdom, hard work, and planning ahead.
• The ants can also rejoice for the season to come.
• They too are ready for it.
3. Do not misread this passage. This lady does not laugh at the future because she is TRUSTING in herself, in her wisdom, in her wealth, in her business, or in her investments.
a. She laughs at the future because she lived a life that was in accordance with God’s Word (seeking wisdom; diligence; family oriented; did her best, etc.)
b. Therefore she is ready for the future.
c. She laughs, not out of pride or self-confidence, but out of the confidence that a godly life brings naturally.
d. This lady put her all in everything she did. She stuck with the projects she took on. She was no quitter. She worked hard and did her very best.
e. She faced all of the problems of the present and worked through them. She didn’t quit or run away. As a believer, she would have learned to trust God and that nothing is too hard for the Lord.
f. That gave her confidence for the future… because God never changes.
g. She had full confidence that she did her part to the best of her ability. She could leave the outcome—the future—in God’s hands.
h. There is a confidence that comes from doing what it right—and this woman had it.
i. Therefore, she could rejoice in the future!
j. The one who goes through life in disarray, disorganized, cutting corners, taking the lazy way out, running away from problems, not doing our best, just doing enough to squeak by, will have plenty to worry about concerning the future.
k. But the woman described in Proverbs 31 is not that person.
l. She is just the opposite. Therefore, her future is not one that she fears.
m. This lady had confidence in God and in God’s ways.
n. Every believer can and should have this kind of confidence with respect to the future. We are not to be worry warts.
o. Confidence in God equals confidence in the future, for God is Sovereign and holds the future.
p. The God who brought us through all the troubles and trials of the past is more than capable of taking us through all the troubles and trials the future may bring—victoriously. We can rejoice in that.
q. The confidence in God this lady possessed instilled in her a confidence about the future that enabled her to rejoice in time to come.
Proverbs 31:26
Wisdom and the Law of Kindness
Introduction:
1. So far in the description of the virtuous woman, we have seen an exceptionally talented and able woman.
a. She is a diligent worker, engaged in many projects.
b. She is described as a maker of yarn, a seamstress, a real estate agent, a vinedresser, a gardener, an organizer, a cook, an energetic and thrifty shopper, and a business woman.
c. She gets up before the sun and she burns the candle into the wee hours of the night.
2. After considering all that she does, one might think that this lady is burning the candle on both ends and is going to have a nervous breakdown any day now.
a. With so many projects going on, one would think that she is going to experience burn out.
b. One might think that as a result of all that she does, her family would suffer in the long run.
c. However, the text does not indicate that she was doing too much.
d. The text does not present all this information in a bad light.
e. All that is recorded of her is to describe the fact that she is a virtuous woman—not a workaholic who ignores her family.
3. Verse 26 gives two reasons that explain HOW this woman is able to do so much without a meltdown.
Wisdom
1. The first explanation is her wisdom. This strong, able, virtuous woman was also WISE.
2. WISDOM defined: Wisdom; skill; experience; shrewdness, the capacity to understand and to have the skills needed for living; technical skills needed to do a craft.
3. USAGE:
a. Ex. 28:3 – Used of the wisdom needed for crafts: “And thou shalt speak unto all that are wise hearted, whom I have filled with the spirit of wisdom, that they may make Aaron’s garments.”
b. Isa. 10:13 – Used of the wisdom needed to conduct war: “For he saith, By the strength of my hand I have done it, and by my wisdom; for I am prudent: and I have removed the bounds of the people, and have robbed their treasures, and I have put down the inhabitants like a valiant man.”
c. Psalm 104:24 – The wisdom of God as the Master Craftsman in creating the world: “O LORD, how manifold are thy works! in wisdom hast thou made them all: the earth is full of thy riches.”
d. I Kings 3:28 – Used of Solomon’s wisdom in governing: “And all Israel heard of the judgment which the king had judged; and they feared the king: for they saw that the wisdom of God was in him, to do judgment.”
e. Psalm 90:12 – The wisdom needed in using time wisely: “So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom.”
4. The virtuous woman who was engaged in so many projects, who worked such long hours, and did so much, did not burn out because she had WISDOM.
a. She had the wisdom needed for her various crafts. (see definition “a.” above)
• Because she was a skilled seamstress, (perhaps learned it from her mother as a child), she was able to make clothing for her family much quicker than a novice.
• People who are skilled in any craft make their craft look easy.
• Skilled craftsmen don’t have to do the same procedure five times over like an unskilled worker does.
• Her husband probably made sure that she had all the right tools for the job too—which is wise. Having the right tools makes any job easier and quicker.
• She didn’t burn out because she wisely used her skills to do a good job in a shorter amount of time.
b. She had the wisdom needed to govern and organize all of the projects she was engaged in. (see definition b, c, d above)
• This lady could walk and chew gum at the same time.
• She was a skilled multi-tasker. Some people just don’t have that ability. This lady did.
• For example, consider what we noted about her organizational skills described in verse 15.
» Using the most common meaning for the term indicates that this woman rose up early to (1) feed her family and her maidens and also to (2) give “instructions” to her maidens. (their work assignments for the day)
» In other words, after feeding her maidens, she used their labors wisely and efficiently.
» The virtuous woman had plans and goals to accomplish each day.
» Evidently, she had already prepared the instructions for each maiden the night before. She had already thought out and perhaps wrote down a “to do” list to give to her maidens each morning.
» She did this because she was a diligent leader of her maidens and wanted to use their talents in a most effective manner.
» This woman was disciplined; organized; a good planner; a wise and efficient manager.
• She didn’t burn out because she had the wisdom to put her organizational skills to work for her.
c. She had the wisdom needed to use her time wisely. (see definition “e” above)
• This lady did not waste time. She didn’t sit around and watch the grass grow.
• She numbered her days and hours and applied her heart unto wisdom.
• She redeemed her time.
• We noted in vs. 15 that she was up before the sun.
• We noted in vs. 18 that her candle didn’t go out at night. (hyperbole)
• She didn’t fold her hands for just a little more sleep.
• God gives us all the same amount of hours in a day and the same number of days in a week.
• What we DO with that time is up to us.
• The example God gives to ladies is a woman who uses her time wisely and diligently.
• This lady was anything but lazy. She was a go getter.
• And because she had wisdom, she knew enough not to be constantly moving and running around without making progress.
• There are some folks who seem to be constantly busy—always doing something—but never getting anything finished.
» They start multiple projects with high hopes of checking everything off their “to do” list, but never seem to finish any of them.
» They live their whole lives surrounded by loose ends that never get done.
» They have good intentions; but they lack the wisdom needed to bring about a satisfactory result.
• The virtuous woman had the wisdom needed to NOT start projects that she could not complete.
» We only read of her finished products in this chapter.
» She didn’t start a sash business and then quit because it was too much for her.
» She had the wisdom to know how much she could get done; how much time she had to put into it; how much energy she had to put into it; how many products she could make.
» In other words, she knew her limits. She set reasonable limits and accomplished her goals.
• The virtuous woman did not burn out because she had the wisdom to organize her time, to redeem her time, and to finish the goals that she set for herself in time.
5. While this lady had many talents, her greatest asset was her wisdom.
a. Prov. 4:7-9 – “Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all thy getting get understanding. 8Exalt her, and she shall promote thee: she shall bring thee to honour, when thou dost embrace her. 9She shall give to thine head an ornament of grace: a crown of glory shall she deliver to thee.”
b. All the activities she was involved in could have and would have destroyed her without the wisdom to allocate her time and energy properly.
c. Prov. 4:11-12 – “I have taught thee in the way of wisdom; I have led thee in right paths. 12When thou goest, thy steps shall not be straitened; and when thou runnest, thou shalt not stumble.”
d. Prov. 9:1 – “Wisdom hath builded her house, she hath hewn out her seven pillars.” Without wisdom, all of her activities could have torn down her house… and household. Wisdom is what made all the difference.
e. Prov. 9:10 – “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom: and the knowledge of the holy is understanding.”
• Her wisdom was characterized by a godly fear. That kept her away from unprofitable projects and pathways.
• Wisdom caused her to seek God in everything.
• God is able to lead and guide: in which projects to take on… and in which activities to bypass… how to use one’s time, etc.
The Law of Kindness
1. This expression is variously translated for a couple of reasons:
a. The meaning of the Hebrew word translated “kindness” has several meanings.
b. The emphasis of the translator either on the word “law” or “kindness.”
2. Consider some of the ways it was handled by various translators:
a. ESV: the teaching of kindness
b. NET: loving instruction
c. NIV: faithful instruction
d. Kiel & Delitzsch – amiable instruction
3. The word translated “law” is the Hebrew word “torah.”
a. It is used of the Old Testament Mosaic Law.
b. The term itself means to teach or instruct… hence, the translation “instruction.”
c. It is translated “law” in Proverbs 1:8 – “My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother.”
d. Here is it used as a synonym for instruction. Either translation is perfectly accurate.
4. The Hebrew word (hesed) translated “kindness” has a wide range of meaning.
a. It is variously defined as kindness, lovingkindness, mercy, faithfulness, devotion, love, etc.
b. It speaks of affection that is steadfast in a relationship.
c. With God it speaks of His faithfulness to His people because of their covenant relationship to Him—all based on His mercy and kindness.
d. This term is often used to describe the character of God.
e. This Hebrew word is used 26 times in Psalm 136 where it is consistently translated as “mercy” (His mercy endureth forever).
f. Mercy and kindness are certainly related terms.
g. This term is used in Prov. 19:22 – “The desire of a man is his kindness.” In other words, that which makes a man desirable is his kindness.
5. Just as God was faithful in His mercy and kindness towards those with whom He had a relationship, so too the virtuous woman was faithful in her mercy and kindness towards those with whom she had a relationship, namely, her husband and family… and perhaps all those she came in contact with (neighbors; business clients, etc.)
6. The law of kindness was “in her tongue.”
a. This expression indicates that this lady TAUGHT her family about kindness verbally.
b. She was able to teach about kindness because she was a kind person herself. Jesus taught us that whatever comes out of the tongue was originally in the heart. (Matt. 15:18a – “But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart.”)
c. Vs. 20 – She was kind to the poor and needy. She used her finances to help them too. She didn’t just “feel” for them. She did something about it.
d. She taught her children all about kindness… perhaps from the Torah – the books of Moses.
• Deut. 15:11 – “For the poor shall never cease out of the land: therefore I command thee, saying, Thou shalt open thine hand wide unto thy brother, to thy poor, and to thy needy, in thy land.”
• Deut. 24:17 – “Thou shalt not pervert the judgment of the stranger…” (foreigners)
• Deut. 16:14 – “And thou shalt rejoice in thy feast, thou, and thy son, and thy daughter, and thy manservant, and thy maidservant, and the Levite, the stranger, and the fatherless, and the widow, that are within thy gates.”
• Ex. 22:26 – “If thou at all take thy neighbour’s raiment to pledge, thou shalt deliver it unto him by that the sun goeth down.” The outer garment was sometimes used as a pledge for a loan or for work to be performed. It was not to be kept overnight by the one loaning the money. It was the poor man’s “bedding.”
• We often think of the Torah with all of its laws, regulations, and penalties. However, the Torah also had much to say about kindness to one’s neighbor.
e. The virtuous woman had the “torah” of kindness on her tongue. She instructed her family in this kind of mercy, love, and kindness.
• Even when she gave orders to her children or servants, she did so, not in the tone of a domineering tyrant, but with kindness. The way you say something is often as full of meaning as what you say.
• Prov. 18:7 – “A fool’s mouth is his destruction, and his lips are the snare of his soul.”
• Some wives might be loose with their tongues = to their own destruction and the detriment of her family. That was not true of this lady.
• She didn’t go about as a talebearer and revealer of secrets. (Prov. 20:19)
• Prov. 27:15 – “A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.” It wasn’t constant nagging that was on her tongue—it was kindness.
• She had a wholesome tongue—which is a tree of life (Prov. 15:4).
7. This tells us something else about the character and heart of this strong, capable woman.
a. She had so many skills, she had so many projects going on, and she was so well organized, that one might begin to think of her as a well-greased machine.
b. But she did not operate like a cold, heartless machine—a taskmaster… or a business woman who trampled on the backs of others to get things done.
c. No, she was not a machine. She was not a robot. She was kind… merciful… and consistently so.
d. Her character was like that of the Lord; she was a godly woman.
e. Sometimes when I have so many things going on, I can get a little snappy.
f. This woman had the wisdom to know her limits. She refused to do so many things that she was no longer kind to others.
g. When Martha was preparing the food for Jesus, she was doing a lot of things. She was very busy, but she wasn’t kind. She began to complain about her sister and even about the Lord.
h. The virtuous woman was kind. She had a heart.
i. She worked hard and diligently. She worked many hours.
j. But she did not allow herself to get so exhausted and frazzled that she took out her frustration on others.
k. She was kind. No wonder her husband and children rose up and praised her.
Proverbs 31:27
The Virtuous Woman and her Household
Introduction:
1. Last week we noted that the virtuous woman (strong, capable woman) was involved in MANY projects.
a. She was described as a maker of yarn, a seamstress, a real estate agent, a vinedresser, a gardener, an organizer, a cook, an energetic and thrifty shopper, and a business woman.
b. She got up before the sun and she burned the candle into the wee hours of the night.
2. One might read this chapter and conclude that this woman was too busy and that her family was being ignored while she was busy with all of her projects.
a. It appears at first glance that she must not be taking care of business in her own household—that her house must be filthy and neglected.
b. With all the projects she had going on, there must be fuzzballs under her bed and green fur in her refrigerator.
c. And yet, when we come to verse 27, we discover that that was not the case.
1. The ways of her household.
a. WAYS: It speaks of the movement of people; a procession; marching activity of soldiers; used of traveling merchants or caravans; it came to mean the affairs or matters, or activities of a person or household.
b. Psalm 68:24 – It is used twice in this verse and speaks of the “goings” of God Himself… His activities.
2. The ways of her household…
a. The ways of her household speaks of all the activities (the comings and goings—the busy-ness—the movements and happenings) in this lady’s home.
b. In every household there is always a time of life when there is lot of activity going on.
c. There are people coming and going—and everyone has their own schedule—everyone has their own activities.
d. There is the husband, the wife, and the kids—and all of their activities seem to intersect in the home.
e. When the kids are young and active, there can be a lot of commotion taking place in the home.
f. There can be a lot of drama at times.
g. There may even be some friction.
h. The expression “the ways of her household” involves all of this combined activity.
3. The virtuous woman looked well to the ways of her household.
a. “Looketh well” means to keep watch; to be a lookout; to intently watch a situation; to guard.
b. Usage:
• Prov. 15:3 – “The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.”
• Habakkuk 2:1a – “I will stand upon my watch, and set me upon the tower, and will watch to see what he will say unto me…”
c. The virtuous woman watched the ways of her household like a hawk… like a watchman guarding a city.
• She watched for bad attitudes in her children, bad language, or bad behavior.
• She kept an eye out for any danger that might enter the home and turned it away.
• She was careful to be engaged in what her children were reading… who their friends were… what they did with their time… their walk with God.
• She may have been a bit nosey at times—but that’s her job! Her job is to watch and to keep on top of things in her household.
d. In other words, even though she had many projects going on, she did NOT ignore her family.
• Her priorities were not out of balance.
• She did not neglect her household duties as a wife, mother, and housekeeper.
• She wasn’t so busy making sashes to sell and spinning yarn that she didn’t have time to attend to the daily needs of her household… her children and her husband.
e. Without verse 27, her priorities might be questioned; but in light of verse 27, it is clear that she balanced her time, energy, and attention carefully, thoughtfully, and wisely.
4. Verse 26 mentioned her wisdom. Verse 27 is an expression of her wisdom.
a. It takes wisdom to be able to balance all of the activities in one’s life… and to know what needs attention, how much, and when.
b. It is easy to be out of balance—which is a foolish way to run a household.
c. Some people don’t have the wisdom to balance life’s activities.
• As a result, they spend all of their time and energy running around like a chicken with its head cut off… lots of activity, but not much accomplished.
• Some spend their time running about putting out one fire after the next… instead of facing and dealing with the source of the fires.
• As a result, they are not led by the Spirit, but are led by circumstances.
d. This lady had the wisdom to look WELL to the ways of her household.
e. She served her family well.
• And keep in mind what Jesus said about serving others in Matt. 20:27 – “whosoever will be chief among you, let him be your servant.”
• Serving others in the home may be ridiculed by our culture, but it is greatness in God’s sight.
f. Titus 2:5 – “To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.”
• This woman was an excellent “keeper at home.”
• That didn’t mean that she never left home; this chapter reveals otherwise.
• But she never neglected home. She “kept” it—guarded it—and preserved it.
• This was a good testimony—“that the word of God be not blasphemed.”
5. The virtuous woman also is described in this chapter as a good organizer and manager.
a. In verse 15 she rises early each morning and gives out the instructions to the servants for the day.
b. In verse 18, she stayed up late getting out orders for her sash business. She managed her time such that she was not overloaded with work and assured her customers that they would have their products on time.
c. In verse 20, she was able to save enough to be able to give to the poor.
d. In verse 21, she planned ahead for the coming cold season and made sure she and her household were ready for it with warm clothing.
e. She organized well and planned ahead.
f. She was a good manager of her time and her household, and she is being praised in verse 27 for that quality.
6. Of course this lady had some advantages that not all ladies have.
a. Vs. 15 – She was a woman of means.
• She had multiple servants working for her.
• Not many women today have servants.
• But it is a good idea to have children engaged in doing age appropriate chores around the house.
b. Vs. 28 – She had a loving family that supported her in all that she did. Not every woman has that.
• Some women have to deal with an unreasonable husband or rebellious children who make it virtually impossible to manage a household efficiently and smoothly.
• Not every woman’s circumstances in life are the same… so these verses are not designed to be used to judge one another.
c. The family seemed to function well together.
• This was no dysfunctional family.
• They worked together—not against each other. Hence, a lot was accomplished by all for the betterment of the whole family.
7. And while the harmony of this household depends upon each member’s willingness to submit, serve, and work together, our proverb seems to give much of the credit to the virtuous woman.
a. She looked well to the ways of her household.
b. She watched over her family like a hawk and did whatever she could to make sure it functioned smoothly and efficiently.
c. She was busy adding to the prosperity of the family, as well as keeping an eye on all the affairs and activities of the household.
1. This was a woman of means. However, she did not use her wealth as an excuse to sit around and waste time or eat the bread of idleness.
a. Vs. 13 – She sought out wool and flax for making cloth.
b. Vs. 14 – She traveled all over town to find the best deals.
c. Vs. 16 – She bought, planted, and tended a vineyard.
d. Vs. 18 – She made and sold merchandise for a profit.
e. Vs. 19 – She worked on a spindle making yarn.
f. Vs. 21-23 – She made clothing for herself and her family.
g. Vs. 24 – She made and sold fine linen and girdles (sashes).
h. She was anything but idle.
2. She rolled up her sleeves and worked WITH her servants.
a. This is humility—and diligence—and wisdom.
b. Vs. 15 – She rose early and prepared food for her “household” – which term includes her immediate family and her household servants.
c. The servants would certainly appreciate this about her.
d. They would also appreciate the fact that she didn’t lounge around eating candy and snapping orders all day.
e. She gave them orders in the morning, and then she (the lady of the house) got busy herself. They all worked together.
f. It is rare for women of means to be such hard workers, when they don’t really have to.
g. Her diligence added to the smooth functioning of the household.
h. No one could ever read this chapter and conclude that this wealthy woman was a lady of leisure. Just the opposite was true.
3. She certainly did NOT eat the bread of idleness.
4. And yet in all of her activities, she never neglected her family. She had her priorities right.
Proverbs 31:28
She is Blessed and Praised
Introduction:
1. We have been considering the many talents, skills, and labors of the virtuous, noble, strong woman in Proverbs 31.
2. In tonight’s verse the author mentions her family’s appreciation for who she is and all that she does.
28a Her children arise up, and call her blessed;
1. The virtuous woman is being praised first of all by her children.
2. She is praised by her children for all that she DOES for them.
a. It is not surprising that her children praise her, considering all the things we have learned about her in this section.
b. Vs. 13 – She is out in the fields getting flax and wool to make clothing for them.
c. Vs. 14 – She travels all over town and perhaps the region looking for the best products—that her children enjoy.
d. Vs. 15 – She is up early in the morning, before the sun rises, to prepare food for her children for the day.
e. Vs. 16 – She planted and tended to a vineyard, the fruits of which her children enjoyed.
f. Vs. 19 – She makes yarn and cloth—which her children wear.
g. Vs. 21 – She sees to it that her household is dressed in warm and fashionable scarlet clothing.
h. Vs. 22 – She makes and decorates her home with beautiful tapestries, which her children enjoy.
3. She is praised by her children for the kind of PERSON that she is to them.
a. Vs. 11-12 – The children saw how well she treated their father.
b. Vs. 15 – They saw how well she treated the servants.
c. They saw her getting up early in the morning and staying up late at night to help provide for the family’s needs.
d. Vs. 20 – They saw her stretching out her hand to the poor.
e. Vs. 22 – They saw her artistic side too in making the home beautiful with her tapestries for wall hangings and bed covers.
f. Vs. 23 – The children knew that to a large extent, their father’s reputation, accomplishments, and status in the city was due to his noble wife standing behind him.
g. Vs. 26 – The children saw her wisdom and experienced her kindness daily.
h. Vs. 27 – The children observed how their mother looked well to the ways of the household, day in and day out.
i. The children of this noble woman learned about self-discipline, orderliness, diligence, endurance, sacrifice, giving to others, generosity, priorities, wisdom, kindness, honor, keeping the household in order, and many other valuable lessons of life by observing their mother over the years.
4. They arise up and call her BLESSED.
a. It’s no surprise that they arise up and call her blessed.
b. It would be remarkable if they didn’t!
c. They are simply acknowledging the facts: this woman IS blessed – blessed by God.
d. She is blessed with wisdom, kindness, diligence, grace, generosity, selflessness, etc.
e. These wonderful traits are not natural. That is not the way the old nature works.
f. These qualities are blessings from above that she manifests on earth.
g. James 1:17 – “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning.”
5. Arising up:
a. This Hebrew word means to “stand” but has lots of different connotations.
b. Here the connotation implied is standing out of respect and honor.
c. Kiel and Delitzch attribute to this term the “idea of reverential honour.”
d. We see this meaning often in the Scriptures.
• Ex. 33:10 – “And all the people saw the cloudy pillar stand at the tabernacle door: and all the people rose up and worshipped, every man in his tent door.”
• Lev. 19:32 – “Thou shalt rise up before the hoary head, and honour the face of the old man, and fear thy God: I am the LORD.”
• I Kings 2:19 – “Bathsheba therefore went unto king Solomon, to speak unto him for Adonijah. And the king rose up to meet her…”
• Rising up was a means of showing respect and honor.
e. The children of this noble woman “rose up” to honor their mother for all she does and for who she is.
6. There is a second possibility for the meaning of the word translated “arise up,” (by Matthew Henry, Harry Irsonside, and others) namely, to arise up one day in the future and take her place—when the children have households of their own.
a. Later in life they will call her blessed.
b. Later in life, when they have their own children, they will realize with much more DEPTH, all that their virtuous mother did for them… all she sacrificed for them… all that she exemplified for them…
c. They may not have appreciated it that much while growing up; but when they “arise up” to adulthood and have their own families, they will realize the debt they owe her.
d. And they will HONOR their mother for years to come.
e. That’s the way it is supposed to work. That’s the norm.
f. This is all certainly true—but I’m not sure this meaning is what the author intended.
• The reason I believe the praise is from her children while they are still children is because of the next phrase in which the husband does the same.
• There is nothing in the context that would lead a reader to believe that her husband waits until the children “arise up” as adults to bless his wife.
1. “Her husband also” – means that her husband also calls her blessed.
2. Her husband praises her for who she is and for all she does.
a. “Praise” means to praise, commend, to boast about; to shine.
• Her husband speaks highly of her; he praises her publically.
• He does not talk about her in a demeaning way, but builds her up with the way he talks about her.
• He boasts of her character and her achievements.
b. Vs. 10 – He realizes that his wife is more valuable than rubies.
c. Vs. 11 – He appreciates that he can trust her with anything. She is on his side and by his side. She is his helpmeet.
d. Vs. 12 – She does him good all the days of her life. How could he not appreciate her? How could he not praise her?
e. And all those other things she did, the fruits of which her children enjoyed, he enjoyed too: fruits from her vineyard, clothing, tapestries for the home, special products she gathered from afar, the extra income she supplied for the family’s needs, the diligence and hard work, her kindness and wisdom.
3. This woman devoted her life to her family; and they appreciate her for all she does and all she is.
a. It is amazing how far a little “appreciation” can go… how encouraging it can be… how reassuring it can be.
b. Some wives sacrifice themselves daily in the home, and never even receive something as simple as a “thank you,” or “nice job.”
c. Appreciation should not be reserved only for her birthday and Mother’s Day.
d. In fact, NOT being consistently thankful for one’s wife is sin: it is a sin of omission. Here’s why:
• Prov. 19:14 – “A prudent wife is from the Lord.” She is a gift from God to her husband.
• James 1:17 – “Every perfect gift cometh down from above and cometh down from the Father…”
• Not being thankful for one’s wife is not being thankful to the Giver… the Lord Himself.
• The Bible has a lot to say about being thankful and EXPRESSING it.
• NOT being thankful and not expressing our thanksgiving is a violation of scores of Bible verses.
• Disobeying Bible verses is called SIN.
e. Thanksgiving and praise for one’s wife is good if it is done out of obedience to God’s Word. It is possible to “say” words of praise because God demands it and you have to.
f. It is better when it also comes naturally from the heart – a heart that has experienced her blessings in many ways… a husband’s heart that is full of genuine love for his wife…
4. This noble woman devoted her life to serving her family, and they recognized it; they appreciated it; they praised her for it.
a. Nothing is more satisfying to a wife and mother to hear such words of appreciation.
b. Appreciation doesn’t necessarily mean a $5000.00 trip to Hawaii.
c. Appreciation can be expressed in simple things… like words from the heart… and countless other expressions that don’t cost a penny.
d. Prov. 12:25 – “Heaviness in the heart of man maketh it stoop: but a good word maketh it glad.”
e. Prov. 15:23b – “a word spoken in due season, how good is it!”
f. Prov. 16:24 – “Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones.”
g. Prov. 25:11 – “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.”
h. Showing appreciation requires thought, heart, love, and encouraging words; but not money or things.
Proverbs 31:29
Thou Excellest them All
Introduction:
1. In the previous verse, Lemuel wrote of the fact that the children and the husband of the virtuous woman both praise her for who she is and for all that she does.
2. The praise continues in vs. 29. In vs. 29, her virtue is compared to others.
3. This verse is unique in that all the other verses speak about this virtuous woman in the third person (she).
a. But vs.29 speaks of her in the second person (you – thou).
b. For that reason, it is probably best to understand vs. 29 as the words of the husband (and children?) addressed to his virtuous wife.
1. The first part of this proverb states the fact that there have been MANY virtuous women.
2. At first, this might sound like a contradiction to the way Lemuel began the description of the virtuous woman.
a. Vs. 10 – “Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.”
• This passage seems to imply that it is hard to find a virtuous woman.
• Such a woman is rare—like a rare gem—a ruby.
• That is what vs. 10 states, and it is entirely true.
• When you cast a broad net out over ALL the women in the entire world, a virtuous woman, like the one described in Proverbs 31, IS rare.
• Vs. 10 states emphatically that they are hard to find. Who can find such a woman?
• But if you have found one, you have found a gem!
b. Vs. 29 states that there are MANY such women.
• This is not a contradiction.
• Compared to all the women in the world, there are not many. They are RELATIVELY rare in that comparison.
• But if you pooled all the virtuous women in the world together, there would be MANY.
• The terms are used in a relative sense.
• For example, the Bible says that there are FEW that enter through the narrow gate compared to the MANY on the broad road. Compared to all the people in the world, very few are true believers.
• However, if we had a conference with all the believers in one place, we might say that MANY attended.
• Numbers by their nature are relative.
3. With that understood, Lemuel states that MANY women have done virtuously.
a. The wife of this husband certainly was not the only virtuous woman in the world.
b. But to him, she was the BEST.
c. Adam Clark wrote: “Thou hast ascended above the whole of them—thou hast carried every duty, every virtue, and every qualification and excellency, to a higher perfection, than any of whom we have ever read or heard.”
d. The expression “done virtuously” is also used in Ruth 4:11.
• “And all the people that were in the gate, and the elders, said, We are witnesses. The LORD make the woman that is come into thine house like Rachel and like Leah, which two did build the house of Israel: and do thou worthily in Ephratah, and be famous in Bethlehem.”
• This was the prayer of the people for Ruth when taken in by Boaz.
• They prayed for her to be a virtuous (worthy; noble; strong; valiant) woman.
• Ruth BECAME that kind of woman.
• She showed signs of it in her single state – before being wed to Boaz.
• But she went on to prove it later throughout her marriage.
e. And Ruth was not the only virtuous woman.
• MANY have done virtuously!
• You don’t have to be perfect to be a virtuous woman.
f. MANY believing women are like rare, precious jewels.
• And among the precious gems, there is a great variety: there are rubies, emeralds, onyx, amethyst, and diamonds.
• They are not all the same; but they are all precious gems.
• They may not all be good at planting a vineyard, or spinning yarn, or as a seamstress, or at cooking.
g. But each one has their own, unique set of skills and abilities that they can use in a virtuous, sacrificial, generous manner.
h. There have been MANY godly wives and mothers over the ages.
1. MANY have done well at virtue; but ONE excels them all.
a. There is no woman on earth like her. Who can find her equal?
• 31:10 – Previously he said, “Who can find one?”
• 31:29 – He says essentially: “There are many out there; you can find one if you look hard enough. But who can find one as good as this one? This one has no equal.”
b. This virtuous woman described in Proverbs 31 is set before the MANY other virtuous women as the ideal woman, the ideal wife and mother as their goal.
• Other virtuous women should strive to be more like her.
• Others should seek to be even more virtuous and to excel at virtue.
2. The usage of the term “daughters” could be taken in two ways:
a. FIRST: The term “daughters” is sometimes used in the Old Testament as a way of referring to women/females in general. (the daughters of Israel)
• If this is the meaning here, then Lemuel is stating that the daughter (actually wife and mother) being described in chapter 31 excels all the other women in the world.
• The woman described here is model and example for all other women in the world.
• This whole section then becomes a description of the perfect woman… the ideal woman. It is a poetic way of describing what other women should strive for.
• This seems to be the most obvious and simplest way to understand this section.
b. SECONDLY: It may imply a contrast between the mother and wife in the family in contrast to her younger daughter.
• If this is the case, then Lemuel is making a contrast in virtue between mothers and their single daughters.
• A young, single daughter in the family may be virtuous.
» She may be kind, diligent, generous, giving, sacrificial, talented, creative, and godly, etc.
» In her single state, she may manifest much virtue.
» But in their single state, they do not have the opportunity to manifest as much virtue as a wife and mother does… who cares for both her husband and her children.
» The young daughters are not mothers yet and have no children to care for in a motherly way.
» They may be virtuous and sacrificial—but they know nothing of the kind of sacrifice of a mother.
» The young daughters may be virtuous, but because they have no husband, they know nothing of the kind of selflessness and service of a wife.
» This is not said to disparage them; they simply don’t have the life experience.
» But the virtuous woman described in this section—who is both a wife and a mother—this woman excels them all!
» Her virtue excels the virtue even of her virtuous daughters.
» For example, if the mother died, and the daughters were charged with caring for their father and the household, a man could not have his household cared for by good daughters as he could by a good wife (a thought from Matthew Henry).
» The daughters may have virtue, but it has never been exercised and proven (tried and true) to the degree of the wife and mother mentioned here.
» They will have their chance later in life to prove their virtue.
3. But for now, the virtue of the wife and mother excelleth them all!
Proverbs 31:30
A Woman that Fears the Lord
Introduction:
1. In this passage we discover the secret to the success, the wisdom, the works, and accomplishments of this woman: she fears the Lord.
2. For this she is praised.
1. FAVOR:
a. Defined: Grace; charm; elegance; favor; popularity (to find favor in the eyes of men).
b. Usage:
• Gen. 39:21 – “But the LORD was with Joseph, and shewed him mercy, and gave him favour (same word) in the sight of the keeper of the prison.”
• Esther 2:15b – “And Esther obtained favour in the sight of all them that looked upon her.”
c. In the context of Proverbs 31:30, the term speaks of a gracious woman, an elegant and charming woman.
d. It may also speak of her as being well liked and favored—because of her charm—popular.
e. And of course, these are good qualities.
f. The virtuous woman probably possessed these qualities too.
2. DECEITFUL:
a. Defined:
• Injurious falsehood; untrue; unreal; a lie; misleading; fraud; a mistaken belief; a deception that disappoints.
b. Usage:
• Psalm 119:128 – “Therefore I esteem all thy precepts concerning all things to be right; and I hate every false way.”
• Ex. 23:7a – “Keep thee far from a false matter…”
• Proverbs 10:18 – “He that hideth hatred with lying lips, and he that uttereth a slander, is a fool.”
» Notice that lying lips cover up what is really taking place on the inside.
» The lips lead you to believe one thing—but it is a lie.
» The reality is that you were deceived… and that leads to disappointment.
c. The term is used most often of deception with the tongue—a lie—words that are misleading and unreal.
3. The point of the proverb is that a charming personality can be deceptive.
a. I don’t understand the words of Prov. 31:30 to be absolute in every case.
b. Note that the word “is” is italicized. It was added by the translators. Something NEEDS to be added.
c. I would have chosen to add “can be” rather than “is.”
d. The word “is” sounds absolute; but it even with that translation, it needs to be understood that this is a proverb. It doesn’t cover every case.
e. Certainly the author is not saying that ALL gracious, elegant, charming women are deceivers!
f. Rather, this proverb is sounding a warning that a gracious, elegant, charming woman CAN BE deceptive.
g. Charm, poise and elegance are good in their place.
• This woman may have gone to finishing school.
• She may have learned just how to behave in public.
• She may wave like Queen Elizabeth.
• She may know just how to hold her silverware, how to stand, how to do all the things that is considered elegant, sophisticated, charming, and proper.
• This woman may be polished – like royalty.
h. However, if that is all a woman has, her charm COULD BE deceitful.
• Charm and polish are good.
• It’s better than being rough, coarse, and rude.
• But charm and polish are merely external.
• They say nothing about her heart… her attitudes… the kind of person she is… what kind of wife or mother she would be.
• In fact, charm CAN BE nothing more than outward show.
• That’s the warning.
i. It might be easy to see a charming, cultured, sophisticated, polished woman and ASSUME that her outward grace and charm are a reflection of her inward beauty.
• That is NOT always the case.
• The outward packaging may be deceptive.
• You can package snake oil elixir in beautiful wrapping—but that doesn’t mean that it IS what you were expecting.
• You might be deceived—and thus very disappointed.
• Many a young man has been deceived by the outward charm of a woman—only to discover after marriage that she was not the kind of person he thought she was!
• It is a deception that disappoints.
1. The parallel:
a. The second part of the proverb is saying virtually the same thing as the first part.
• It may be a synonymous parallelism.
• Favor and beauty
• Deceitful and vain
b. However, “favor” and “beauty” are not exactly the same. It is possible that it was intended to be a synthetic parallelism – one that builds upon the first section.
2. BEAUTY:
a. Defined: The term is like our English word beauty.
• It speaks of physical beauty – and is often used of the beauty of a woman, as is the case in Proverbs 31:30.
• Like charm, elegance, and favor, beauty is good. There is some value to beauty.
• The Bible does not belittle or demean beauty; but it does send out some warnings… especially to young men.
b. Usage:
• Esther 1:11 – “To bring Vashti the queen before the king with the crown royal, to shew the people and the princes her beauty: for she was fair to look on.”
• Proverbs 6:25 – “Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids.”
• Physical beauty is eye catching, attractive, and very appealing. It can even be seductive—so be careful with beauty.
c. There is a place for beauty.
• The virtuous woman was very likely a beautiful and attractive woman.
• She attracted the eye of a king (King Lemuel)—who could have virtually any woman in the kingdom he wanted.
• The virtuous woman obviously took good care of herself. She didn’t just “let herself go.”
• Proverbs 31:22 – She was very well dressed. She was fashionable. She paid attention to detail.
• Again, notice that the word “is” is italicized. It would prefer adding “can be”, as in the first section.
• It is not that beauty IS vain in every case. But beauty CAN BE vain.
d. The thought is similar to Proverbs 11:22: “As a jewel of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion.”
• In this proverb, Solomon describes a woman without discretion.
• Her outward beauty and grace are compared to a jewel of gold. They are visible and attractive.
• But that is not what the woman IS. The woman IS a pig who happens to have a nice piece of jewelry in her snout.
• The nice jewelry does not change the nature of the pig.
• Charming women can be the exact opposite of charming on the inside.
• This woman was fair (the fairest of them all?) on the outside. But she lacked discretion on the inside.
• Peter tells us that you can wash a pig on the outside spick and span, but pigs will be pigs. They will eventually return to rolling in the mud.
• Jesus said that cleaning the outside of the cup is good; but the inside of the cup is what really matters.
3. Beauty is VAIN.
a. Vain defined: Empty; a vapor; passing; meaningless.
b. Beauty is good, but only skin deep.
c. If that’s all a woman has, she is shallow and empty.
d. Beauty is like a vapor in that it doesn’t last.
• The stunning beauty that you marry at 20 may not be so stunning later on in life.
• In time, she will become old, gray, and wrinkly. It’s just a fact of life.
• And eventually that beautiful body becomes dust.
• Earthly beauty in a mortal body is vain… like a vapor. It doesn’t last.
• It is foolish to commit the rest of your life to a woman on the basis of physical beauty alone. That is truly vain.
• It’s not just the body that you marry; but the PERSON who lives in that body.
1. Here Lemuel encourages his readers to look a little deeper than the skin. Beauty is only skin deep… and it doesn’t last. It’s the mind and heart UNDER the skin that counts.
2. II Cor. 4:16 – “For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day.”
a. The physical body is in the process of “perishing.”
b. But for a godly person—one who fears the Lord—what really counts is that the PERSON inside that body is being renewed daily—into the image of Christ.
c. What really makes a woman beautiful is on the inside.
d. External beauty does not guarantee internal character.
e. A very ugly woman may be dwelling in a gorgeous body.
3. I Peter 3:3-4 – “Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; 4But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.”
a. Peter is not saying that outward beauty is evil or that women should not take care of the outside of the cup.
b. But rather, Peter is saying that while outward beauty has its place—that is not what makes a woman truly beautiful.
c. True beauty is on the inside… it is “hidden” in the heart. It is a meek and quiet spirit.
4. The most important question is, “Does she fear God?”
a. If she truly fears God, then:
• She will be faithful to her husband.
• She will walk in humility before God.
• She will obey God’s Word—and thus be a good wife and mother.
• She will be wise – for the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.
• She will honor her husband, who has been appointed by God as her head.
• She will do her best to BE the kind of woman described in Proverbs 31:10-31. She will be a virtuous woman.
• Fearing God is at the root of all the virtue in this woman.
b. Interestingly, this is the first mention of God in this section on the virtuous woman. This is the climax of the poem.
• So far it has been all earthly qualities—but qualities that obviously were present in this lady BECAUSE she feared God.
• Fearing God changes everything. That’s what to look for!
1. We see the virtuous woman being praised by her husband and children (vs. 28-29).
2. We will see more of her being praised in the community (vs.31).
Proverbs 31:31
Give Her the Fruit of Her Hands
Introduction:
1. This is the final passage dealing with the virtuous woman.
2. The section ends with more words of praise for her.
3. Vs. 28 – Her children and her husband praise her.
4. Vs. 29 – She is praised for excelling all others in virtue.
5. Vs. 30 – She is praised, not for her charm or beauty, but for the fact that she fears the Lord.
6. Vs. 31 speaks of rewards for her virtue.
A. The Fruit of Her Hands
1. What are the FRUIT of her hands?
a. They are the fruit of her labors.
b. The whole section has been describing her labors.
c. The fruit of her hands is a figure of speech which means the REWARD of her hard work.
2. Consider the work of her hands in this chapter.
a. Vs. 12 – She DID her husband good all of the days of her life. This speaks of the good DEEDS she did daily.
b. Vs. 13 – She sought out wool, flax, and worked with her hands. She worked with the sheep and in the fields collecting flax. She worked these two materials with her hands to produce yarn and linen for making clothing for both cold and warm days.
c. Vs. 14 – She traveled far and wide seeking the best products and the best deals for her family.
d. Vs. 15 – She got up before sunrise every day and prepared meals for her family and for the household servants.
e. Vs. 16 – She bought a field and planted a vineyard—and evidently took care of the vineyard so that her family would have fresh fruit and would have something to drink… wine to sweeten the water.
f. Vs. 18 – She made merchandise—working into the wee hours of the night.
g. Vs. 19 – She laid her hands to the spindle – making yarn and cloth for clothing.
h. Vs. 20 – She was involved in helping the poor. Some of the fruit of her labors she gave to helping others in need.
i. Vs. 21 – She made warm clothing for her household in winter; she made scarlet (fashionable) clothing for her family.
j. Vs. 22 – She made artistic tapestries to beautify her home (for wall hangings; bed covers; and clothing). She also made clothing of silk and purple—more beauty and fashion.
k. Vs. 24 – She made sashes to sell in the marketplace. This was evidently a lucrative business that she managed.
l. Vs. 27 – She labored diligently and was not idle.
m. And of course there would be thousands of other labors of love involved in caring for and training the children.
3. All of this had a monetary value.
a. How much would it cost to hire someone to come into the household and do all this work?
b. How much would it cost to hire someone to take a wild field and plant a vineyard and maintain the vineyard?
c. How much does it cost to clothe a family for a year?
d. How much would it cost to hire a cook to come into your home and prepare three meals a day?
e. How much would it cost to hire a home decorator—and not just a decorator, but to manufacture or pay for all the decorations?
f. How much would it cost to have someone clean your home every week? How about every day?
g. Each of the verses considered speaks of many hours of labor—hard labor. And it continued all the days of her life.
h. How much would all that cost?
i. It’s no wonder that the section begins by saying, “her price is far above rubies.” (vs. 10)
• The price of rubies was between: $1,200 to $25,000 per carat. (according to awesomegems.com)
• The virtuous woman is far more valuable that rubies.
4. As Americans, we may not be able to appreciate this portion of Scripture as people in other cultures and in other centuries may have appreciated it.
a. Compared to women worldwide, women are treated well in the USA. There are laws protecting them from mistreatment. They get equal pay for equal work. They have freedom to marry whoever they want. They can go to school and get a good education. They can choose to be a stay at home mom or they can seek a career. They can vote. They can drive and travel wherever they want.
b. That has not always been the case throughout world history.
c. Women have been treated as second class citizens.
d. Men have taken advantage of them.
e. Just consider the lives of many women in the Middle East and elsewhere—even today in the 21st century.
• It was against the law for girls in Afghanistan to go to school.
• Women are raped and it is virtually impossible for them to win in court.
• Women must wear a burka.
• In some countries women are not allowed to drive a car.
f. But regardless of how poorly women were treated in various cultures throughout the centuries, in the BIBLE, they were honored.
g. The Bible speaks of their VALUE.
h. The BIBLE praises them.
i. Of course there are those today who believe the Bible degrades women because they are to submit to their husbands. That is based on a misunderstanding of what headship and submission involves. The world has seen too many example of headship taken to the extreme. Women are most content and fulfilled when they fulfill their God given role God’s way.
j. But apart from the Bible misinterpreted and misapplied, what the Bible actually SAYS (rightly divided) exalts women… honors women… and values women.
k. Proverbs 31:10-31 is a perfect example of this.
B. Give Her the Fruit…
1. This command goes beyond verbally praising a virtuous woman for her labors of love. This command speaks of actually GIVING her the rewards of her labors.
2. The command seems to be addressed to her household – her husband, children, and household servants.
3. She is to be VALUED for all that she does.
4. This also speaks of giving her GIFTS or money or something substantial for all that she does… as a means of appreciation and just because it is right. The workman is worthy of his (or her) reward.
5. The point is that she should EAT of these fruits too. She should be able to enjoy the benefits of her labors.
6. And later on in life her children are to “give her the fruit of her labors” according to I Tim. 5:4: “But if any widow have children or nephews, let them learn first to shew piety at home, and to requite their parents (pay back): for that is good and acceptable before God.”
7. It might seem so obvious to us today in America that such a hard working woman should receive the fruit of her labors. But that has not always been the case historically.
a. Cruel, ungodly husbands have abused the concept of headship and have NOT rewarded their wives. Their wives get precious little for their labors. They are not valued.
b. A godly husband will obey the command in this passage.
1. The two commands:
a. The first command is direct: “give her.”
b. The second command is indirect: “let her.”
2. This command is that the labors of this virtuous woman were to be seen “in the gates” – the center of community life.
a. Most of her works revolved around the home.
b. But her praise is not confined to the home.
c. The community (in the gates) will honor such a woman.
d. Her best praise is ascribing to her all her own works.
e. The demonstration of her works praises her. They carry their own commendation.
f. Dorcas was praised publically for all the clothing she made for others in the community. Her own works proclaimed her goodness and perhaps the best means of praising her. The garments she made for others spoke loudly.
g. Ruth’s love and care for her mother in law and her labors in the fields of Boaz earned her high PRAISE in the community.
3. Her husband and children should praise her.
a. But ultimately, it is the life, character, and works of this virtuous woman that give her the greatest praise.
b. It was her life – a life of “doing good and not evil all the days of her life” that bring the greatest praise to her.
c. Even if she has an ungodly, selfish, and cruel husband who never praises her; even if she has ungrateful children who never praise her—her faithful LIFE and her WORKS shall praise her.
d. Her ungrateful family may not praise her in this life. She may feel that there is no point in trying to be a virtuous woman any longer. But that is no excuse for a virtuous woman to “give up.”
e. Ultimately, a godly, virtuous woman is not serving her family exclusively; she is actually serving the Lord.
f. I Cor. 15:58 – “Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye stedfast, unmoveable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labour is not in vain in the Lord.”
g. And as a faithful, virtuous Christian lady stands before the Lord at the Bema seat, she shall receive the greatest praise of all, “Well done, thou good and faithful servant.”
h. When all is said and done, that is the praise that really matters.
