Proverbs
Notes on Proverbs – Chapter 5
Proverbs 5:1-6
The Strange Woman
1 My son, attend unto my wisdom, and bow thine ear to my understanding:
1. Solomon addresses his son on an issue that is obviously of grave concern to him: he is speaking about the strange woman—the harlot.
2. In fact, Solomon spends nearly three entire chapters (5-7) on this subject!
3. Why does he devote so much time to it?
a. Evidently, the sin of adultery was very much available in his day. There is a LOT in the Bible about this sin—as it is today.
b. Perhaps another reason for such an extended treatment of this subject is because of the devastating and long lasting consequences of this sin!
c. One man suggested that Solomon gives such a lengthy treatment of the subject is because it was a beam in his own eye.
• His own personal downfall began by taking on many wives. (I Kings 11:1-3)
• These may be lessons Solomon learned from experience. He doesn’t want his son to make the same mistakes he did.
4. Now Solomon tells his son to listen carefully to what he is about to say on this subject. Bow thine ear!
5. At this point, Solomon may be speaking to a grown, married man. (vs.15 – seems to imply that he was married.)
2 That thou mayest regard discretion, and that thy lips may keep knowledge.
1. Solomon wants his son to regard discretion…
a. Regard: watch; keep; observe; pay heed; retain
b. Discretion: purpose, discretion, device,
c. Solomon wants his son to guard this purpose or resolve in life: to remain pure…
2. That thy lips may keep knowledge… he wants his son to KNOW and to be aware of the dangers of the strange woman…
3. A father who loves his son will warn him about the harlot… her ways… her deception… and a father who loves his son will do all he can to see to it that he regards discretion and keeps this knowledge…
4. Ps.119:9, 11 – a young man will cleanse his way by taking heed to God’s Word… and hiding it in his heart—that he might not sin against God.
3 For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil…
1. Now Solomon begins to describe the strange woman. The first thing he says about her is that she is deceptive.
2. When he mentions her lips and mouth, it is not clear whether he is speaking of her kisses or her words.
3. But that is not the main point. The main point is that she comes across as sweet as honey and smoother than oil…
a. 2:16 – the strange woman flatters with her words…
b. 7:21 – the strange woman used her sweet words to entice this young man.
4. His warning seems to be this: be careful if someone comes across as TOO sweet… or TOO smooth.
a. Ps. 55:21 – smooth words on the lips CAN be a phony cover for something sinister in the heart.
b. This is a good warning in lots of areas other than the strange woman!
c. Be careful about the sweet talking salesman who is smoother than oil!
d. Be careful about anyone who “butters you up.” They often have ulterior motives.
e. The salesman’s motive is to get your money into his pocket…
• When a total stranger calls me on the phone and begins asking how I am… I can be pretty sure that he really doesn’t care.
• When someone is syrupy sweet to me, alarms go off immediately.
f. That is the case with the strange woman. She does have ulterior motives.
g. The strange woman wants to use the young and foolish man… she is not out for your good!
5. Of course we don’t want to go overboard and not trust anyone. But we do need to exert caution when the words are sweeter than honey… smoother than oil. That is often a tactic used to “get something” out of you…
6. This woman tries to lead the young man to believe that his life will be sweeter and richer…happier… more enjoyable and more pleasant by being with her.
a. Her flattery makes him feel good… important… someone cares about him… thinks highly of him… …(“she really cares about me!”)
b. For somebody that has been down in the dumps, that can be quite enticing…—that is exactly her plan.
c. Like the salesman who tries to convince a prospective customer that if he signs on the dotted line, his life will be immeasurably improved! That is not always the case once you sign!
d. Very often the snake oil and all purpose elixir doesn’t really cure arthritis and make your hair grow back! The words of the salesman were sweet and smooth—but were deceptive. They led you to believe something that was not true.
7. In a sense, this is the very nature of sin. It is sweet, smooth, and promises us the world… but does not come through…
a. Sin of all types makes promises of pleasure… and seems to come through at first. (Heb. 11:25)
b. Sin is pleasurable, but it doesn’t last. It is only for a season…
c. Like the high of a drug—it is pleasurable for a time, but soon you crash… and your body eventually pays the consequences…
d. The devil is a master at making evil look good…and so is Madison Avenue. And so is the strange woman. Don’t be fooled by any of them. It is all the same tactic.
4 But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.
1. Now Solomon describes her END…
a. At first, she comes across as sweet as honey… but in the end, she is as bitter as wormwood.
b. At first she comes across as smooth as a fragrant oil anointing your skin… but in the end she is as sharp as a sword piercing and penetrating into your skin… ripping you open!
2. His point is the obvious contrast between her beginning (how she first introduces herself) and her end (the end results).
a. The beginning: sweet and smooth. The end: bitter and sharp!
b. The pleasure and sweetness that seemed to characterize this relationship at first will eventually develop into a bitter spirit.
c. The adulterer who seeks a few moments of pleasure may discover that the price was his marriage… his kids… his home… everything down the tubes… and a life of bitterness sets in.
d. I’m sure every one of us knows several families ruined by adultery. It is bitter.
e. The adulteress promises pleasure and happiness… but brings ruin and destruction and bitterness instead.
f. Adultery feels good initially… but in the end it hurts like the piercing of a sword.
g. These are not idle threats… these are not exaggerated warnings. This is the stuff of real life.
3. This contrast between the initial sweetness and bitterness in the end is true of virtually every enticement of sin.
a. Prov. 23:31– when you initially look at wine in the cup its color, smell, and ambiance are quite appealing… sweet and smooth…
b. Prov. 23:32 – however, in the end (at the last) it bites like a serpent!
c. Prov. 23:33 – alcohol leads to all kinds of other sins.
d. Prov. 23:34-35 – it makes you sick…
e. Prov. 23:19 – it produces woe, contentions, wounds…
f. I Tim. 6:9-10 – the same thing is true of the promise of riches. They allure through covetousness… and promise happiness… but in the end pierce men through with many sorrows… hurtful lusts… it can drown men in destruction and perdition!
g. Sin is always attractive in prospect—but hideous and hurtful in retrospect!
4. The sinner is deceived into thinking that nothing will happen to me. I will be able to get away with it. There will be no consequences to my action.
a. If the men and women living in cardboard boxes and sleeping in their own vomit in the back streets of Boston could have seen a video of their “END” before they took their first drink—they probably would never touch alcohol.
b. If the married man who ended up getting divorced, losing his wife, his kids, his home, his job… was told the outcome of his adulterous affair, he probably would never have gotten involved.
c. Why does it happen? Self-confidence—it won’t happen to me! I can handle this. I won’t fall! Pride!
d. I Cor. 10:12 – Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth, take heed lest he fall!
5 Her feet go down to death; her steps take hold on hell.
1. The way of this strange woman is the way of death… she is on the road to destruction that leads to condemnation.
2. There is a narrow way—which is too straight and narrow for her ways.
3. Then there is the broad way of destruction. That is her road… She is headed for death and hell… and she is enticing others to come along.
4. At first she seemed so sweet and smooth… but in the end—death!
5. There is a way which SEEMETH right unto a man, but the ends thereof are the ways of death.
6. The devil attempts to make evil look good—seem right.
7. Don’t be fooled. Those who practice sin are headed for death and hell.
6 Lest thou shouldest ponder the path of life, her ways are moveable, that thou canst not know them.
1. Finally, he describes her most effective tactic—speed.
2. Her ways are moveable…
a. She is slippery… she moves and changes to meet the various circumstances… lest you get away!
b. She works upon every weakness… snatches up every unguarded moment—LEST you ponder the path of life!
c. She knows she has but a short time to make the sale…
• Have you ever tried to say NO to a lively salesman?
• You don’t want new vinyl siding, well, could we interest you in some new windows? No windows, well how about a new roof!
• They are trying to make a sale before you hang up or walk away… and thus are moveable… slippery… changeable… if you don’t fall for the first sales pitch, they’ve got ten more!
3. The strange woman is moveable… LEST you begin to start thinking… pondering the path of life…
a. She does not want to give time for the conscience to begin to kick in…
b. She affords the young man no time to reflect upon what he is about to do…
c. She does not want the young man to have time to think about the possible consequences…
d. The idea here is similar to the unbelievable offer the salesman has for you on this new time sharing condo… but the offer is only good if you sign now… don’t stop and think about it—just sign now!
• They too can be quite “moveable”!
• If you don’t fall for their first pitch… they keep the pitches coming until one seems to sound too good to ignore!
e. In a similar fashion, the strange is moveable…changeable… she’ll say whatever you want her to say… promise whatever you want to hear… just ACT NOW! Don’t stop and think about how this will impact your life… just do it!
f. Ps. 119:59 – she’s afraid that he will think on his ways and turn away!
4. Solomon wants his son to KNOW this… to know her tactics… her motives… so that his son will FLEE youthful lusts… and not fall prey to this evil woman.
Proverbs 5:7-14
The Results of Immorality
Introduction:
1. Thus far in the chapter (vs.1-6), Solomon pointed out to his son the deception of the immoral woman. She comes on as sweet as honey and smoother than oil, but in the end is bitter… and sharp like a sword.
2. In this next section (vs.7-14), Solomon warns his sons about the consequences of immorality.
3. He begins in vs. 7 as he did in vs.1 by strongly exhorting his son to LISTEN carefully to what he is about to say… HEAR… and don’t depart from what you hear! This is important.
4. In vs. 8 he warns his son to stay away from the immoral woman.
a. Notice that he warns his son not even to come NEAR her door!
b. Don’t put yourself in temptation’s way!
c. Lit. = distance your road from her…
d. Pray that God would lead us OUT of temptation…
e. If we pray for that, then we are responsible to stay away ourselves too!
• There is no sense in praying for deliverance from sin if we insist on toying with objects or places that are associated with sin!
• Run away—like Joseph!
f. Rom. 13:14 – make no provision for the flesh!
g. The application to us is clear. We, too, should avoid ANYTHING and everything that would stir up our flesh… (TV; videos; Internet; magazines; — make no provision for the flesh! Don’t even come close to her door!)
h. Of course there isn’t anything sinful about being near her door—except that it places you only one step away from sin!
i. For that reason, we should FEAR sin… and fear being around temptation. We should fear it and stay away like we would fear leprosy and stay away… or any other deadly disease. Avoid it like the plague!
Lost honor (vs. 9a)
1. Honor = splendor, majesty, vigor, glory
2. The man who spends his time with immoral women is handing over… throwing away… losing his honor, integrity, and self-respect.
3. Prov. 6:32-33 – this man receives dishonor and a reproach that will not go away!
a. This sin results in a wound—a painful experience—in contrast to the pleasure of sin in the immediate… the long lasting consequences are a painful… like a wound that never heals. It will always be a sore spot.
b. This sin produces a reproach that is not wiped away. It is a mark of dishonor that you wear…
c. All sin can be forgiven, but not wiped out. The consequences of some sins cannot be wiped out…
d. David’s reproach for his sin with Bathsheba was never wiped out.
• He genuinely repented and God forgave him.
• God called him a man after his own heart.
• But—this reproach of this sin STICKS to David to this day!
• It didn’t mean God had no use for him or that he could not be restored to fellowship with God. He was… but the stigma remained. That is the nature of the sin of immorality.
• This is what Solomon warns his son about! If you fail in this area, you will be branded with this label as David was.
Lost years (vs. 9b)
1. The adulterer and fornicator will not only lose his honor, he will lose years off his life.
2. It is not entirely clear whether Solomon had in mind
• Sexually transmitted diseases…
• Or perhaps the revengeful rage of a jealous husband who seeks to kill the man who went with his wife…a love triangle often results in murder… watch the 6:00 o’clock news!
• Or perhaps just as a general principle that those who live in the fast lane lose years off their life…
• When children obey their parents—it adds years to their life. Here’s one way a son can listen to and obey his father and add years unto his life.
Lost wealth (vs. 10)
1. This sin is costly too—expensive! Your wealth could end up in the hands of strangers!
a. There is a cost for prostitutes… and it can become addicting like a drug… (Prov. 29:3)
b. The prodigal spent his father’s wealth on harlots. That was the complaint of the older son, “He hath devoured thy living with harlots.”
2. If disease results, there is a cost to that too. (lost wages; doctors; etc.)
3. Sometimes bribes and blackmail must be paid to keep the affair quiet…
4. 6:34-35 – Solomon implies that the man involved in this sin might have to try to make up to the offended husband with gifts and money—but it will not work.
5. If a child is produced, then there is the cost of child support…
6. This kind of lifestyle and the reputation earned by it may result in poor performance at work and it may hinder your career and thus your pay…
7. If this sin is widely known it can cause you to lose your job in some instances… especially if it involves someone from work.
8. This sin can be costly in many ways. Your wealth could end up in the hands of strangers.
9. There could be lawsuits involved! All your labors (all you have worked for) could end up in the house of a stranger… someone else might end up possessing all your possessions! Recently there have been court cases where one spouse sues the adulterer for breaking up the home—and they have won!
10. Prov.6:26 – this sin can reduce a man to a piece of bread. It strips a man of all he has… down to a piece of bread! I know of such cases! Solomon probably did too—thus he warns his son!
Lost health (vs. 11)
1. Not only can the sin of immorality take away your honor and wealth, it can destroy your body too!
2. The flesh and body being consumed may speak of diseases transmitted.
3. It can shorten your life… it can also make your life miserable… sick… a consumed body.
4. The destruction of the body may be the result not only of this kind of immorality, but of the whole lifestyle that goes along with it—life in the fast lane… usually includes drugs or alcohol…
5. This kind of person is obviously not taking care of his or her body. In time, this lifestyle WILL catch up to you and will consume your flesh.
Lost opportunity (vs. 12-13)
1. These are the words of the man given to lust at the end of his life.
a. He has just experienced all of the consequences of his sin.
b. Now he knows what people had warned him earlier.
c. Now he has lost his honor, his wealth, his health, his respect…
d. At the end of his days he has nothing… and he laments his life of poverty, disease, and disgrace.
2. People warned him of the dangers and the consequences, but he hated the instruction… he despised the reproofs… back then he didn’t want to listen to anyone. He just wanted to do his own thing.
3. Now he realizes how he has wasted his life… he should have listened, but it is too late now. “If only I had listened…” seems to be the intent of this verse.
4. This seems to be the most painful of the consequences… living the rest of his days knowing that the shame, disgrace, poverty, and poor health is all his fault! Living with the guilt… the stinging conscience… the regret… the irretrievable loss… hurts!
• David said of his sin, “my sin is ever before me.” (Ps. 51:3)
• How many times did David say, “If only I had turned away that night on the roof”?
5. This foolish man groans because he refused to listen to his parents… to his Sunday school teacher…
Lost respect (vs. 14)
1. Finally, the author speaks of his loss of respect in the community.
NIV = “I have come to the brink of utter ruin in the midst of the whole assembly.”
2. This man’s sin caused him to lose face in the community… it brought him not pleasure but disgrace…
3. Some have been brought to the brink of suicide because of the shame, guilt, and consequences associated with their sin.
4. This loss of respect also served as a warning to others NOT to commit sins of immorality. There was a stigma attached to it—like the wearing of the scarlet letter. That had a sobering effect on the community…
5. Unfortunately, this stigma seems to be lost in our culture… unless your picture appears on TV as a sexual offender. Adultery seems to have no stigma any more—but it sure did in Bible days.
6. Our society seems to have lost its ability to blush or to feel shame.
7. However, if there is any sense of shame at all—this sin will bring it out!
8. This kind of a lifestyle leads to remorse and a wasted life… and ultimately the man is disgraced in his community—which meant something in the olden days—when honor meant something.
Conclusion:
1. We reap what we sow. (Gal. 6:7-8)
2. Failing to take heed to the warnings of a godly father results in a life of regret later on.
3. In our loose age these warnings are more needful than ever before. These kind of warnings need to be given to kids at a younger and younger age nowadays too.
4. Solomon gives his son lots of things to THINK about. He wants his son to THINK about the consequences of sin. We should think about such things too. It leads to making wiser decisions. It instills fear in us…
5. In the end it results in a loss of health, wealth, honor, it leads to mourning (vs. 11a); is bitter (vs. 4); regret (vs. 12-13); ends in disgrace (vs. 14).
6. These are good reasons to remove thy way far from the immoral woman!
Proverbs 5:15-17
Drink Waters Out of Thine Own Cistern
15 Drink waters out of thine own cistern, and running waters out of thine own well.
1. In figurative language, Solomon tells his son to be faithful to his wife.
2. Solomon uses these two figures (a cistern and a well) to illustrate a man’s relationship to his wife.
a. Cistern: a shallow well…a pit… often a large container to store water in.
• In Bible lands, each man had to keep his own supply of water.
• There was no running water… and sometimes even the wells would run dry. A cistern was necessary.
b. Running waters = speaks of a spring of water… sometimes called “living” water—because it moves…
3. To a man living in a dry, hot, arid region, a cistern or running well water would symbolize perfect physical refreshment.
a. When the man is hot, he runs to the well for a drink. That’s what it’s for!
b. When a man or woman has a physical need—that is what your spouse is for!
c. The cistern or well is itself bubbling up and is for his refreshment; to satisfy him;
d. A well is always there—always a source of satisfaction.
e. I Cor. 7:4 – this is a two way street—for both husband and wife.
• If Solomon was speaking to his daughter, he might say the same kind of things. In fact, he did in Song of Solomon.
c. A spring shut up; a fountain sealed: (Song of Sol. 4:12)—Here Solomon uses a similar illustration.
• His bride was like a garden enclosed in walls—keeping all others out. Gardens were walled off to keep out intruders… people who don’t belong there…
» Isa. 5:1-4 – God spoke of Israel, his wife, as an enclosed garden.
» God wanted Israel all to Himself. He did not want her to chase after other lovers…after other gods.
» Thus, she was enclosed… hedged about…
• She is like a spring that is shut up—closed to all but her husband.
• He likens his wife to a sealed fountain of refreshment and satisfaction, but only for him.
• She had kept herself “sealed” up for only her husband, preserving her purity for her husband.
f. Your marriage partner is for your refreshment and satisfaction—physically, emotionally, and in every other way.
4. The command here is to “drink water out of your own cistern” or to seek refreshment and satisfaction from your OWN cistern… and from your OWN well.
a. The sexual desire is likened to a desire for water—an intense thirst that needs to be satiated. A cistern or a bubbling well will satisfy that thirst.
b. In other words, his command is—don’t seek satisfaction or gratification outside of your marriage partner! Drink from your own well.
c. If you don’t have your own well (if you are not married) then wait until you have your own well! (It is better to marry than to burn—if you’re really thirsty, you need a well)
d. If you DO have your own well (if you are married) then don’t go seeking to drink from some other man’s well! That’s adultery.
e. The husband is not to drink from another man’s well. And the wife is to be a fountain sealed off—a spring shut up to all but her husband.
f. These passages speak clearly about God’s design for marriage.
• And note that the man is to have ONE cistern (singular).
• Interestingly, these words of wisdom were spoken by Solomon—who later came to have 700 wives!
• He recorded this wisdom for us, but he didn’t follow it himself. This was his downfall. (I Kings 11:1-4)
5. Jeremiah 2:11-13 – illustrated unfaithfulness using the figure of a cistern.
a. vs. 11 – Israel was unfaithful to God—her Husband. She went after other gods.
b. Vs. 12 – this is a fearful thing… this kind of sin should cause men to shudder.
c. Vs. 13 – God’s people committed two evils:
• First, they forsook God. He was to them a fountain of living water! Unending refreshment and satisfaction spiritually.
• Secondly, they hewed out cisterns. They made their own replacement for God! (Idols) A cistern is a pretty poor substitute for a spring of living water… but they made the exchange. Later they discovered that the cistern they made was cracked and unable to hold water—their false gods provided no real satisfaction.
d. Thus, seeking another cistern was used to illustration unfaithfulness. Here to God—in Proverbs, to one’s wife.
6. Taking these two passages together makes it clear that God demands faithfulness.
a. Not everyone is always happy in their marriage. I have counseled quite a few folks who were not.
b. But regardless of the level of happiness or fulfillment—the command still stands: Drink waters out of thine own cistern! Physical needs are to be met only within the confines of marriage.
c. And those emotional and spiritual needs that are not being met by your earthly cistern can be met in God—He is better than a cistern. He is a ever-springing fountain of living water—unending Source of satisfaction and refreshment for the soul.
d. We have no guarantee that our spouse will walk with the Lord, be kind to us, or even be faithful to us.
e. But we DO have a guarantee that the Lord will be faithful—and that He can supply all the inner needs of our soul, which may not be met by an unfaithful spouse.
f. Our God is a fountain of living water…
16 Let thy fountains be dispersed abroad, and rivers of waters in the streets.
1. The same motif is used in this passage—of fountains and waters.
a. Only this time, he speaks of the fountain as the husband—the male. His inner physical drive is likened to a fountain or a river of water… constantly flowing or bubbling up and needs an outlet.
b. The wording in the KJV seems to be encouraging the male to disperse his fountain all over town.
2. This sentence seems to contradict what Solomon just said in vs. 15.
a. For that reason, most translations have chosen to translate this sentence as a question.
b. NAS: Should your springs be dispersed abroad, Streams of water in the streets?
c. NIV: Should your springs overflow in the streets, your streams of water in the public squares?
d. NKJV: “Should your fountains be dispersed abroad, streams of water in the streets?”
e. The obvious answer to the rhetorical question is NO! Of course he should not let his water flow out into the public squares!
f. His point is that Solomon did not want his son to be promiscuous and father children all over town!
g. The passage speaks of the utter waste of reproductive power when involved with a prostitute or adulterous situation.
h.) He likens it to a man who would take water from his cistern and throw it away on the streets of the town! What a waste! This would be seen as an especially foolish thing to do by those who lived in a dry, desert region.
i. The physical relationship between husband and wife is a precious commodity—not something to be thrown around foolishly.
3. Thus, the wife is like a bubbling fountain—an inner drive that is to satisfy the husband. The husband, too, is like a bubbling fountain, and that fountain is not to be thrown all over town, but is for the satisfaction of the wife.
a. I Cor. 7:1-5 – this union was created by God.
b. Marriage was designed by God to satisfy needs.
c. It is designed to meet those needs in order to prevent immorality. (vs. 2)
d. Paul warns the marriage partners to render due benevolence to their spouse—in other words—both partners are to satisfy! So that your spouse doesn’t seek to drink from another cistern!
17 Let them be only thine own, and not strangers’ with thee.
1. Now he tells his son not to allow his fountains (reproductive powers) to flow all over town.
a. Some understand the “them” to refer to the children produced illegitimately…
b. Others see the “them” as a reference to fountain of sexual desire mentioned in the previous passages.
c. The two ideas are not necessarily mutually exclusive.
d. He may be speaking of the drive and the product of that drive (children)
e. If he dispenses this drive all over town, then the product of that (the children) will not be your own, but will belong to a stranger!
f. The Bible speaks highly of the value of children. Our society doesn’t value them as God does (or we wouldn’t have all the abortions we do).
g. The result of the man who is dispersing his fountain all over town is such a waste!
• Precious children who could be such a blessing to him will instead be brought up in miserable environment of a prostitute.
• It is a tragedy when illegitimate children are brought into the world. The circumstances are tragic…
h.) If the “them” refers only to his fountain—his drive—then Solomon is saying that it should be satisfied not with strangers, but with his own wife.
Proverbs 5:18-21
Rejoice with the Wife of Thy Youth
Introduction:
1. Solomon has been warning his son against the sin of sexual immorality.
a. He warns against the strange woman—harlot (vs. 3-4)
b. He tells his son to stay away from the evil woman (vs. 8)
c. He warns of the consequences of failing to do so (vs. 9-14)
2. In the last half of this chapter, he tells his son HOW to remain pure in this area.
a. Be faithful to your own wife—don’t go to someone else’s wife… drink out of your own cistern. (vs. 15-17)
b. Be satisfied with your own wife. (vs. 18-21)
18 Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth.
1. In the previous section, Solomon had just warned his son to be faithful to his own wife. He reiterates that in different language in vs. 18.
2. Let thy fountain be blessed…
a. His fountain refers back to vs. 15 – his wife is his source of water—his cistern… his well of running water.
b. Solomon says, let your own well be blessed… Your wife IS a blessing. Let her be a blessing to you physically too.
c. Your OWN wife ought to be the source of your happiness or blessedness. Don’t go looking elsewhere to find “happiness.”
3. Rejoice with the wife of thy youth…
a. Don’t go to another man’s wife to find happiness or joy. Find it with your own wife!
b. Learn to rejoice with your wife…
c. God has designed the wife to be a source of blessing and joy to her husband—and vice versa. (Ecc. 9:9)
d. It was not good that man should be alone, so God made him a helpmeet.
• It was not good because man is a social creature and needs the fellowship…
• It was not good because man has a physical need too that could only be filled by a woman…
• So God created marriage… to be a source of blessing and joy.
• Solomon warns his son NOT to look outside of marriage to find this blessedness or joy. Rejoice with your own wife!
4. Solomon seems to imply here that a lack of happiness of joy could LEAD to immorality.
a. Too often a partner in marriage becomes unhappy… discouraged… disappointed… down… depressed… and in need of a lift… in need of some happiness and joy… (A vulnerable position!)
b. Along comes what appears to be someone who makes you feel good… they flatter you… make you feel happy again… takes away the blues… you feel uplifted… just what you needed… Watch out!!!
c. We are so FEELINGS oriented… but we shouldn’t be. We are to live our lives by FAITH that rests upon the FACTS of God’s Word… not by how we feel!
d. Solomon warns his son to find his joy with his own wife!
e. WORK at being happy with your own spouse…
f. And if your spouse is not cooperating… then remind yourself that you DIED with Christ…
g. Remind yourself that your main purpose in life is NOT being happy but being faithful to God—which means being faithful to your spouse.
h. God expects us to be faithful to our spouse regardless of HOW we feel!
i. If we DO what is right, in time, we will FEEL joy and contentment in the fact that we are obedient…
j. Thus, if we know that unhappiness in a marriage leads to immorality, we ought to work at being happy with our spouse! AND do all you can to make your spouse happy and joyous in the relationship…
k. Rejoice with the wife of thy youth!
5. Note also that Solomon did not say to rejoice with the WIVES of your youth, but with your wife—singular!
19 Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.
1. Here Solomon gives his cure for a young man being captivated by the strange woman—be captivated by your wife!
2. Let her be as a loving hind and a pleasant roe…
a. This is language similar to that used in Song of Sol. 2:9,17.
b. Obviously, this was flattering language… in an agricultural society it was considered flattering to be compared to beautiful, graceful animals like a deer.
c. I wouldn’t recommend that any men here compare their wives to any sort of animal today—it won’t go over nearly as well today!
d. BUT—compliment her!
3. Solomon then tells his son to be satisfied with his wife and to be ravished in her love.
a. Satisfied – if a man is satisfied with his wife, there is no need to look elsewhere!
• Drink from your own cistern and satisfy your thirst—and then you won’t be tempted to drink from another man’s cistern.
• Satisfied = to be satiated or saturated, have or drink to one’s fill; to be drunk or intoxicated…
• Marriage should be physically satisfying—for both partners.
• It should be joyous, satisfying, and fulfilling.
• How does a young man avoid being ensnared by the immoral woman? By drinking from his own cistern and to drink to one’s fill = be satiated and saturated!
• The marriage bed is HOLY—be filled with that kind of holiness… and don’t go looking elsewhere. It isn’t holy anywhere else!
• A wise husband who wants to remain pure will drink to the full at his own cistern! His thirst is FULLY satisfied!
• A wise wife will do the same…
• Note that it says, “at all times”…
• One of the quickest ways to drive a spouse to immorality is to “close the well”—if the thirst isn’t satisfied at home, it WILL be elsewhere!
• That’s why Paul says in I Cor. 7:3-6 – that the wife doesn’t have power over her own body—the husband does… and the husband doesn’t have power over his own body either—the wife does!
• Paul also said “defraud ye not one the other” = except it be with consent and for a little time lest ye tempted for your incontinency! (lack of self control)
» The problem is that we usually approach this from the wrong perspective. We expect to BE satisfied… to BE happy…
» However, true fulfillment comes from satisfying your partner!
» Contentment and satisfaction does not come by “receiving” but through “giving.”
» If we selflessly serve others—we will BE satisfied. If we are constantly looking to BE satisfied, we will be empty… because we are approaching the matter in a selfish way.
» Love is about giving… not getting.
» This principle is true in marriage… in the local church… in all kinds of relationships—“It is better to give than to receive.”
» This is true of the physical relationship in marriage—it is true in every other part of marriage — true fulfillment and contentment comes through selflessly serving and pleasing the other…
b. Be ravished in her love…
• Ravished = to err, stray; to swerve, meander, reel, roll, be intoxicated, err (in drunkenness)—here it has the idea of being drawn into something… captivated…
• Solomon tells his son that it’s OK to be enticed or captivated by love—just make sure it is HER love … the wife of thy youth!
• Note also: always! This is a constant part of marriage. Don’t ignore it.
• Don’t be ravished or intoxicated by magazines… or TV… or movies… or videos… or pictures on the Internet… or by flirting at the water cooler… or in any other way…
• Be always ravished in HER love!
• This is Divine wisdom speaking in these verses… God’s method of sexual purity…
20 And why wilt thou, my son, be ravished with a strange woman, and embrace the bosom of a stranger?
1. Now Solomon challenges his son to THINK… to think about WHY he would ever want to do such a thing as get involved in immorality.
2. WHY? (vs. 3-4) when you know it ends in bitterness?
3. WHY? (vs. 9) when you know your honor given to others…
4. WHY? (vs. 10) when you know that strangers will be filled with thy wealth?
5. WHY? (vs. 11-12) when you know that it will bring nothing but remorse and mourning later…
6. WHY? When you know that water from your own cistern is just as sweet… and without the guilt, remorse, and loss of honor?
7. WHY be ravished with a strange woman when God has given you your own spouse… to have and to hold and to embrace and to rejoice with… WHY?
8. WHY embrace the bosom of a stranger if (1) you know it ends in bitterness, and (2) your own wife is a source of blessing and joy?
9. Why poison your own fountain? Immorality just doesn’t make sense. It is folly.
21 For the ways of man are before the eyes of the LORD, and he pondereth all his goings.
1. WHY be ravished with a strange woman? There are lots of reasons not to. Here’s one more: God is watching!
• God is watching when we are sitting in front of the TV… or a video
• God is watching when we read a magazine… or are on the Internet…
2. If YOU don’t want to watch your own steps—rest assured, God is watching… He is pondering ALL our goings… and our thoughts… and desires…
3. This truth should affect our conscience… and cause us to FEAR sinning against the Lord in this way.
4. Consider the words of Solomon as he ended the book of Ecclesiastes: (12:14) – “For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good or whether it be evil.”
5. That’s why it is a good idea for US to “ponder the path of thy feet” (Prov. 4:26) Pay attention to what you are doing… what direction you are taking… where your feet are leading you… especially in the area of morality.
6. Immorality is a plague in our land today… it is considered acceptable in the world. It is UN-acceptable to God.
Proverbs 5:22-23
The Cords of Sin
Context
1. Solomon is warning his son about the dangers of sin in this verse.
a. vs. 22 – his own iniquities…his sins…
b. What Solomon says is true about sin in general… all sin.
2. The context of the chapter indicates WHICH sin in particular he is speaking about: the sin of sexual impurity… adultery…
a. vs. 3 – Warning of the strange woman
b. vs. 8 – remove your way far from her
c. vs. 15 – be faithful to your own wife… don’t look elsewhere for satisfaction.
d. vs. 20 – why be ravished with a strange woman?
e. The entire chapter deals with this one issue.
3. He has also warned his son about the consequences of this sin…
a. vs. 4 – it ends as a bitter experience
b. vs. 5 – her feet go down to death… hell…
c. vs. 9 – loss of honor
d. vs. 10 – strangers filled with your wealth
e. vs. 11 – mourning… body consumed…
Consequences
A.) His Own Iniquities Shall Take the Wicked Himself
1. Iniquities – perversity, depravity, iniquity, guilt or punishment of iniquity.
a. Note that Solomon is not talking about sin in general, but about a man’s own personal sins.
b. There is a sense in which we are ALL affected by sin in general…
• We all live in a cursed earth…
• We all have bodies that are affected by sin in general…
• We all face the possibility of being robbed… killed… potential of war…
• We all face the potential of dealing with the consequences of the sins of others.
• Sometimes others sin and we have to pay the consequences (ex: if a politician wastes our money; if someone wrongly accuses us)
c. But here Solomon is talking about a man’s OWN sins.
• There are consequences to our own sins too…
• And we have no one to blame for these sins but ourselves.
• There is no passing the buck when it comes to our own sins.
• This passage deals with an obvious but often overlooked consequence of our own sins.
2. Take – to capture, take, seize; to take hold of;
a. The wicked is TAKEN by his own iniquities.
b. The wicked here refers to the sinner… and the particular sin in this context is immorality.
c. The term take means “capture.”
d. Gesenius defines the term as “to take or catch animals in a net or in snares.”
e. Cf. its usage in Amos 3:5 – “and have TAKEN nothing?”
f. Cf. Ps. 35:8 – “catch” is the same word as “take” in Prov. 5:22
g. It is also used of taking captives or capturing a city. (Josh. 11:12)
h.) Thus, Solomon is saying that (of sin in general, but this sin in particular) that sin can take hold of a person… seize him or her… capture him/her… carry away as a captive…
i. Thus, the picture of this sin is like that of a trap… there is bait… and then there is the closing of the trap…
• The bait – vs. 3
• The trap – vs. 4
j. A trap takes you in… but doesn’t let you go!
• A trap usually has some bait to allure the animal
• But, once the door closes, that animal is trapped and is no longer free…
• The little bite of carrot or meat that allured the animal to the trap is certainly NOT worth the consequences!
• The point of this passage is not simply that there ARE consequences. The point seems to be that sin can SEIZE us—lay hold of us and not let go!
k. NIV – The evil deeds of a wicked man ensnare him;
l. NASB – His own iniquities will capture the wicked,
m. Of course the obvious answer to this sin problem is never to start!
• Whether the sin is immorality… adultery… pornography… alcohol… drugs… if you don’t start, you won’t get trapped!
• If you turn away from the bait, the trap door will never close on you… and rob you of your freedom!
• If you don’t take your first drink, you won’t become an alcoholic!
• If you drink from your own cistern, and are ravished always in her love (vs. 20), then you won’t become ensnared in an illicit affair.
• If you refuse to open that first pornographic web site or magazine, you won’t become captured by it!
• If you refuse to take that first hit of cocaine, you will never become addicted.
n. BUT, the wicked man IS taken captive… and by his OWN sins! He has no one to blame for the tragic results but himself!
B.) Holden With the Cords of His Sins
1. The second part of the verse says essentially the same thing… synonymous parallelism—for emphasis and explanation.
2. Holden – to grasp, hold, support, attain, lay hold of, hold fast
a. His sins “HOLD” him… hold him fast…
b. The sense is similar to the previous term “take” = take captive; seize
c. Sin will “take hold” of a man… or woman… or young person…
d. The previous term implied a trap or a snare. Thus, we have a picture of HOW a man’s iniquities can “take” or capture a man…
e. This part of the verse also gives us a mental picture as to HOW sin holds us… like cords.
3. Cords – a cord, rope, territory, band, company
a. Used in Josh. 2:15 – Rahab let the spies down from the wall with a cord.
b. Ps.140:5 – used in conjunction with a snare—a rope trap…
c. Gesenius translates this word as a “gin, a noose, a snare”
d. Its main meaning is that of a cord… a rope… that has the capacity to ensnare and do harm…
4. Solomon warns his son that the sin of adultery and immorality is ensnaring…
a. It is like winding a cord around yourself.
b. Even if that cord is as thin as a tiny piece of thread…it CAN ensnare.
c. Sin is deceptive like that. A man might commit a sin, and discover that the sin can be broken as easily as a mere piece of thread.
d. That self-confidence emboldens him to commit the sin again… and again…
e. And while it might be broken easily at first, once MANY threads have been wound about the man—he soon discovers he can’t get out!
f. Our pride and self confidence assures us that we can break the habit at any time… this passage implies that that is not so.
• Repetition forms a habit
• Habit becomes a ruling principle… second nature…
• Sin becomes easier to commit… harder to break…
g. Cf. Prov. 29:6 – sin has a built in “snare”!
h. Cf. Prov. 1:31 – sinners eat the fruit of their own way… filled with their own devises…
i. In a sense, God doesn’t have to continually judge men for their sin. Sin has a built in judgment attached. God doesn’t have to chain the sinner down… his own sins are like chains that he places on himself…
5. Ecc. 7:26 – And I find more bitter than death the woman, whose heart is snares and nets, and her hands as bands: whoso pleaseth God shall escape from her; but the sinner shall be taken by her.
a. Once again, Solomon warns that the sinner will be TAKEN by her.
b. The immoral woman is like a snare, a net, a trap, bands that will seize a young man.
c. Now if Solomon were talking to his daughter he would have warned her about the immoral man in the same way…
6. The way to escape is to escape NOW…
a. Don’t wait… don’t linger… run like Joseph.
b. Sin’s habit might be broken as a thin thread at first…but if left unchecked those threads can accumulate rapidly… and become binding…
c. It’s easy to quit smoking after your first cigarette. It is difficult after 10-20 years of smoking!
C.) He Shall Die Without Instruction
1. This kind of sin is destructive.
a. Prov. 11:3b – the perverseness of transgressors shall destroy them.
b. Prov. 11:5b – but the wicked shall fall by his own wickedness.
2. Death is not unusual for a man who has no control in this area of his life.
a. Death because of an outraged husband seeking revenge…
b. Death because of disease
c. Death because of life in the fast lane in general…
3. NIV – He will die for lack of discipline…
a. Instruction: discipline, chastening; correction
b. The point is that underneath the sin of immorality a total lack of self discipline… a lack of self control…
c. That is a killer!
d. Prov. 28:25 – A man without self control is like a city whose walls are broken down… defenseless… powerless… easily overtaken by anyone or anything…
e. That man will die… he will be attacked and defeated!
D.) In the Greatness of His Folly He Shall Go Astray
1. Here Solomon speaks about another consequence of the sin: going astray.
2. The sin of immorality will lead a man FAR away from where he once was.
a. Away from God… from family… from kids… from friends…
b. He ends up far, far away… not because there is no way back, but because usually the man has LOST his common sense…
c. Hos. 4:11 – Whoredom and wine and new wine take away the heart. (no sense left—no heart for leaving the sin…)
3. It is not just folly, but GREAT folly!
4. Gal. 6:7-8a – Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. 8For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption;
